If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not a poet
enough to call forth its riches; for to the creator there is no poverty and no poor indifferent p Life is a great big canvas; throw all the paint on it you can.
-- Danny Kaye In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person
must be fired.
-- Conway's Law "There is no quality in this world that is not what it is merely by contrast. Nothing exists in itself." (Herman Melville) Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
-- Woody Allen Politics blah "Sometimes it is said that man cannot be trusted with the government of himself. Can he, then be trusted with the government of others? Or have we found angels in the form of kings to govern him? Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
-- Carl Friedrich Gauss, when informed that his wife was dying "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) Politics
The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.
-- Jilly Cooper We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
- Niels Bohr No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent.
-- Abraham Lincoln Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains or slavery? Forbid it,
Almighty God! I know not what course others may take but as for me; give me liberty or give me
de Politics It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
-- Andre Gide "To err is human; to forgive, divine." (Alexander Pope) I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
-- Groucho Marx Politics
That government is best which governs least.
-- Henry David Thoreau, Civil Disobedience, 1849 Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.
-- Michael Leunig You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
-- Indira Gandhi I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President It was very good of God to let Carlyle and Mrs Carlyle marry one another and so make only two people miserable instead of four, besides being very amusing. Politics "I owe much to my friends; but, all things considered, it strikes me that I owe even more to my enemies. The real person springs life under a sting even better than under a caress." (André Gide) "Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance it accumulates in the form of inert facts." (Henry B. Adams) "Guard with jealous attention the public liberty. Suspect every one who approaches that jewel. Unfortunately, nothing will preserve it but downright force. Whenever you give up that force, you are ine Politics
The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.
-- Oscar Wilde Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add
up.
-- Anon Nothing that was worthy in the past departs; no truth or goodness realized by man ever dies, or
can die.
-- Thomas Carlyle "Beauty without expression is boring." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) I'm not indecisive. Am I indecisive?
-- Jim Scheibel, mayor, St. Paul MN Politics You can not apply mathematics as long as words still becloud reality.
-- Hermann Weyl Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
-- Albert Einstein Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux Politics
Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
- Jimmy Durante "There is no such thing as a person that nothing has happened to, and each person's story is as different as his fingertips." (Elsa Lanchester) "The easiest kind of relationship is with ten thousand people, the hardest is with one." (Joan Baez) The one serious conviction that a man should have is that nothing is to be taken too seriously.
-- Nicholas Murray Butler Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
-- Mark Twain Politics A theory is something nobody believes, except the person who made it. An experiment is
something everybody believes, except the person who made it.
-- Albert Einstein, attributed All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
-- Charlie Chaplin Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.
-- Ken Dodd Politics
"Courage is found in unlikely places." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Only positive consequences encourage good future performances.
-- Kenneth H. Blanchard I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Marry not a tennis player. For love means nothing to them. A really busy person never knows how much he weighs.
-- Ed Howe Politics In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
-- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 It makes no difference who you vote for - the two parties are really one party representing four
percent of the people.
-- Gore Vidal Politics
It is dangerous for a national candidate to say things that people might remember.
-- Eugene McCarthy If I had been around when Rubens was painting, I would have been revered as a fabulous model.
Kate Moss? Well, she would have been the paintbrush...
-- Dawn French I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law.
-- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes. "It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what other men say in whole books--what other men do not say in whole books." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols) It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
-- Oscar Wilde Politics Men have become the tools of their tools.
- Henry David Thoreau ( "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) "Never frighten a little man. He'll kill you." (Robert A. Heinlein) Politics
Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.
-- Josh Billings If your professor wrote it, it's as near to the truth as you ever need to get.
-- John Watson, University of Canterbury "Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." (Dennis Wholey) "In some ways, I never outgrew my adolescence. I wake up in the morning and think, 'Oh my God, I'm late for a math test!' But then I say, 'Wait a minute. I'm 40.'" (Daniel Clowes) Public office is the last refuge of a scoundrel.
-- Boies Penrose, 1931 Politics As for the virtuous poor, one can pity them, of course, but one cannot possibly admire them.
-- Oscar Wilde "A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool." (William Shakespeare) Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way
around the laws.
- Plato Politics
"The easiest kind of relationship is with ten thousand people, the hardest is with one." (Joan Baez) Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is most important that you do it.
-- Gandhi "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) Every flower must grow through dirt.
-- Anonymous "God is Man's stupidest idea." (Marcel Duchamp, French Dadaist) Politics Two souls with but a single thought,
Two hearts that beat as one.
-- Fredrich Halm "I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats." (Woody Allen, in regard to the KKK) There is nothing better for the spirit or the body than a love affair. It elevates the thoughts and
flattens the stomachs.
-- Barbara Howar Politics
Beneath the rule of men entirely great, / The pen is mightier than the sword.
-- Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton, Richelieu, II. ii We look forward to the time when the power to love of will replace the love of power. Then will our
world know the blessings of peace.
-- William Gladstone Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner "If you meet a woman that smokes cigars ... marry her." (Arthur Lotti) Weaseling out of things is good. It's what separates us from the other animals....except weasels.
-- Homer Simpson, character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show Politics Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours.
-- Benjamin Disraeli A small family is soon provided for.
-- English Proverb "The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none." (Thomas Carlyle, 1795-1881) Politics
How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create
it herself.
- Anais Nin There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written.
-- Oscar Wilde Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
-- T.S. Eliot "Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." (Native American Proverb) I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
-- Anonymous Politics The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
-- General George Patton "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g "How can we know the dancer from the dance?" (William Butler Yeats) Politics
