History is more or less bunk.
-- Henry Ford Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
- Jean-Paul Sartre A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
-- Carl Sandburg Hark, the Herald Tribune sings,
Advertising wondrous things!
-- Tom Lehrer He who kisses the joy is it flies lives in eternity's sunrise
-- William Blake Education Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who
can't read.
-- Frank Zappa Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage,
he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it.
-- Helen Roland Life - a sexually transmitted terminal condition.
-- Walter Prager Education
Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
-- Red Buttons In great matters men show themselves as they wish to be seen; in small matters, as they are.
-- Gamaliel Bradford However, never daunted, I will cope with adversity in my usual manner...sulking and nausea.
-- Tom K. Ryan We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.
- General Douglas MacArthur The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies Education I don't know as much as God, but I know more than He did at my age.
-- Henry Kissinger Reason can answer questions, but imagination has to ask them.
-- Ralph N. Gerard "Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." (Blaise Pascal) Education
Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times.
-- Jonson, Ben You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
- Sacha Guitry The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it.
-- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and
retaliation. the foundation of such a method is love.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) Education The weirder you're going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too.
When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing
extraordinary As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are
certain, they do not refer to reality.
-- Albert Einstein Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing
popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.
-- Dave Barry Education
You will marry into an Indian tribe and become one big Hopi family. The best teacher is the one who suggests rather than dogmatizes, and inspires his listener with
the wish to teach himself.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Whatever you are, be a good one.
-- Abraham Lincoln Who, being loved, is poor?
-- Oscar Wilde He who receives an idea from me receives instruction for himself without lessening mine; as he
who lights his taper at mine receives light without darkening me.
-- Thomas Jefferson Education Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to
happen to him.
-- John Barrymore - last words For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt "A man of genius makes no mistakes; his errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery." (James Joyce) Education
Considering the flames and intolerance, shouldn't USENET be spelled ABUSENET?
-- Michael Meissner "Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at close of day. Rage, rage against the dying of the light." (Dylan Thomas) A narcissist is someone better-looking than you are.
-- Gore Vidal With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly good I thee endow.
-- Wedding Vow, Book of Common Prayer blah "A subject for a great poet would be God's boredom after the seventh day of creation." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Education The fantasy which serves as a support for the figure of the Stalinist Communist is therefore
exactly the same as the fantasy which is at work in the Tom and Jerry cartoons.
-- Slavoj Zizek Golf is a good walk spoiled.
-- Mark Twain We always believe our first love is our last, and our last love our first.
-- Anonymous Education
I still live.
-- Daniel Webster, dying words "Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) If the headache would only precede the intoxication, alcoholism would be a virtue.
-- Samuel Butler There is nothing more notable in Socrates than that he found time, when he was an old man, to
learn music and dancing, and thought it time well spent.
-- Michel de Montaigne The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
-- Honore de Balzac Education Marriage is more than four bare legs in a bed.
-- Hoshang N. Akhtar When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland "Do something for the joy of doing it and pray you won't be punished." (Sammy Cahn) Education
Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times.
-- Jonson, Ben Democracy is the name we give the people whenever we need them.
-- Marquis de Flers Robert and Arman de Caillavet "Where there's a marriage without love there will be love without marriage." (Benjamin Franklin) "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to
contact us.
-- Bill Watterson, in his comic strip Calvin and Hobbes Education To keep your marriage brimming
With love in the marriage cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
Whenever you're right, shut up. -- Nash Food, one assumes, provides nourishment; but Americans eat it fully aware that small amounts of
poison have been added to improve its appearance and delay its putrefaction.
-- John Cage A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
-- Gloria Steinem Education
Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for the greatest fool may ask more than
the wisest man can answer.
-- Charles Caleb Colton The nation's honor is dearer than the nation's comfort; yes, than the nation's life itself.
-- Woodrow Wilson "Anyone who thinks they're important is usually just a pompous moron who can't deal with his or her own pathetic insignificance and the fact that what they do is meaningless and inconsequential..." ( Ambition is not a vice of little people.
-- Michel de Montaigne The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
-- George Bernard Shaw Education "Mothers spend a lifetime excising from their sons the influence of their fathers." (Arthur Lotti) Icky icky icky icky fKANG zoop-boing n zowzyin...
-- The Knights who so recently said "Nee!", Monty Python, British comedy television show "Ask five economists and you'll get five different answers (six if one went to Harvard)." (Edgar R. Fiedler) Education
As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-- Proverbs 23:7 Consequences, schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich!
-- Chuck Jones-directed cartoon The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I
have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
-- George Bernard Shaw Half of the American people never read a newspaper.
Half never voted for President.
One hopes it is the same half.
-- Gore Vidal Technology makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except over technology.
-- John Tudor Education It is because modern education is so seldom inspired by a great hope that it so seldom achieves
great results. The wish to preserve the past rather that the hope of creating the future dominates
the A narcissist is someone better-looking than you are.
-- Gore Vidal "Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time." (E. B. White) Education
I begin by taking. I shall find scholars later to demonstrate my perfect right.
- Frederick (II) the Great In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
- Martin Luther King Jr. I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love.
-- Mother Teresa Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
-- George Santayana A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
-- Michel de Montaigne Education "It is awfully easy to be hard-boiled about everything in the daytime, but at night it is another thing." (Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises) The good people sleep much better at night than the bad people. Of course, the bad people enjoy
the waking hours much more.
-- Woody Allen We have art to save ourselves from the truth.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Education
I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the
advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults of the first.
-- Benjamin Franklin It is absurd to divide people into good or bad. People are either charming or tedious.
-- Oscar Wilde "I never resist temptation, because I have found that things that are bad for me do not tempt me." (George Bernard Shaw) The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
-- Robert Benchley Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i Education "Man looks in the abyss, there's nothing staring back at him. At that moment, man finds his character. And that is what keeps him out of the abyss." (Hal Holbrook, Wallstreet) Twenty years fron now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones
you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in
your I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
-- Gandhi Education
