"Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free." (Emma Lazarus) "The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available.
-- Jim Beggs The philosophy exam was a piece of cake -- which was a bit of a surprise, actually, because I
was expecting some questions on a sheet of paper.
-- Smith & Jones I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal Travel and Tourism Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
-- Don Stanford You cannot create experience. You must undergo it.
-- Albert Camus "When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost." (Billy Graham) Travel and Tourism
I am become death, shatterer of worlds.
-- Robert J. Oppenheimer, citing from the Bhagavadgita, after witnessing the world's first nuclear
explosion Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.
-- Josh Billings Ah, well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
-- Oscar Wilde, dying words "Feeding is a very important ritual for me. I don't trust people who don't like to eat." (Gina Gershon) Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can
never tell.
-- Joan Crawford Travel and Tourism "I praise loudly. I blame softly." (Catherine the Great) "God is a gentleman. He prefers blondes." (Joe Orton, Loot) And now, in keeping with Channel 40's policy of always bringing you the latest in blood and guts,
in living color, you're about to see another first -- an attempted suicide.
-- Chris Hubbock, who sh Travel and Tourism
"If you believe everything you read, you better not read." (Japanese Proverb) The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.
-- Virginia Woolf The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins.
-- Heywood Brown The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort After all, all he did was string together a lot of old, well-known quotations.
-- H. L. Mencken, on Shakespeare Travel and Tourism "The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." (David Russell) A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
-- Carl Sandburg Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Travel and Tourism
The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind
woman.
-- S. T. Coleridge The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism
is the equal sharing of miseries.
-- Winston Churchill I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
-- Lewis Grizzard I am not young enough to know everything.
-- Oscar Wilde We haven't the money, so we've got to think.
-- Lord Rutherford Travel and Tourism Those parts of the system that you can hit with a hammer (not advised) are called hardware;
those program instructions that you can only curse at are called software.
-- Unknown author, Levitating T "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man." (George Bernard Shaw) Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available.
-- Jim Beggs Travel and Tourism
"I have an unfortunate personality." (George Orson Welles) Love me or hate me, but spare me your indifference.
-- Libbie Fudim Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find
out how to do it.
-- Theodore Roosevelt Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust.
-- Grover Cleveland "Dream as if you'll live forever; live as if you'll die tomorrow." (James Dean) Travel and Tourism Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does.
-- Groucho Marx I have been attacked by Rush Limbaugh on the air, an experience somewhat akin to being
gummed by a newt. It doesn't actually hurt, but it leaves you with slimy stuff on your ankle.
-- Molly Ivins My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no
character.
-- Charles Barkley, on hearing Tonya Harding proclaim herself "the Charles Barkley of fig Travel and Tourism
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
--Anon. I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
-- Groucho Marx It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince Politics have no relation to morals.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli I was nauseous and tingly all over... I was either in love or I had smallpox.
-- Woody Allen Travel and Tourism I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't.
-- Jules Renard We never live; we are always in the expectation of living.
-- Voltaire In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th Travel and Tourism
Nuns: Women who marry God. If they divorce Him, do they get half the universe? A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.
-- Dean Acheson Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. "Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) Travel and Tourism Virtue is like health: the harmony of the whole man.
-- Thomas Carlyle "Drugs have done a lot of good. A lot of good songs have been written. 'Penny Lane' is worth 10 dead kids. 'Dark Side of the Moon?' 100 dead kids. At least that many were conceived by people listening It is no use walking anywhere to preach unless our walking is our preaching.
-- St. Francis of Assisi Travel and Tourism
If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?
-- Calvin Trillin If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
-- Lily Tomlin We can say 'Peace on Earth,' we can sing about it, preach about it or pray about it, but if we have
not internalized the mythology to make it happen inside us, then it will not be.
-- Betty Shabazz Marriage still confers one very special privilege - only a married person can get divorced. If your wife wants to learn how to drive, don't stand in her way. Travel and Tourism Does anal retentive have a hyphen?
-- Seen on a t-shirt When a girl marries she exchanges the attention of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold
of a hammer.
-- Will Rogers Travel and Tourism
Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan In a great romance, each person plays a part the other really likes.
-- Elizabeth Ashley If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.
-- Alphonse Karr Life is the flower for which love is the honey.
-- Victor Hugo A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
- John D. Rockefeller Travel and Tourism When people go to work, they shouldn't have to leave their hearts at home.
-- Betty Bender Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
-- Chinese Proverb Just buy a box of popcorn and a Coca-Cola and sit back and watch.
-- James Carville, Clinton advisor, offering advice for Democrats on the term-limits vote in the
House Travel and Tourism
It's true that I did get the girl, but then my grandfather always said, "Even a blind chicken finds a
few grains of corn now and then."
-- Lyle Lovett, musician, upon marying actress Julia Roberts, What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words "I consider it the highest compliment when my employees go out and start their own companies in competition with me. I always send them a plant to wish them well. Of course, it's a cactus." (Norman B Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure "Freedom of press is limited to those who own one." (Henry Louis Mencken) Travel and Tourism Life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments.
-- Rose Kennedy Suicide is belated acquiescence in the opinion of one's wife's relatives. The difference between a man who faces death for the sake of an idea and an imitator who goes
in search of martyrdom is that the former expresses his idea most fully in death while the latter
really Travel and Tourism
An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets the more interested
he is in her.
-- Agatha Christie Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.
-- Samuel Butler "Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills." (Minna Antrim) It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
-- Mae West Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
-- Abraham Lincoln Travel and Tourism Love is blind -- marriage is the eye-opener.
-- Pauline Thomason Its failings notwithstanding, there is much to be said in favor of journalism in that by giving us the
opinion of the uneducated, it keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community.
-- Oscar W Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
-- Carl Friedrich Gauss, when informed that his wife was dying Travel and Tourism
