Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas
doctors rob you and kill you too.
-- Anton Chekhov If you can't convince them, confuse them.
-- Harry S. Truman Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football.
-- John Heisman Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way
around the laws.
- Plato "I like boring things." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) Education "I know that God won't give me more trouble than I can handle ... but sometimes I wish he wouldn't trust me so much." (Mother Teresa) People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard "In large states public education will always be mediocre, for the same reason that in large kitchens the cooking is usually bad." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Education
The best time to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
-- Josh Billings Reason can answer questions, but imagination has to ask them.
-- Ralph N. Gerard ... it is certain that the real function of art is to increase our self-consciousness; to make us more
aware of what we are, and therefore of what the universe in which we live really is. And since
Silence is argument carried out by other means.
- ErnestoCheGuevara And since the stench of death will always attract flies and vermin, the arrival of Geraldo was
perhaps inevitable.
-- Garry Trudeau Education Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-- George Bernard Shaw Well if this is the wrong number, why did you answer it?
-- James Thurber Good hours, excellent pay, fun place to work, paid training, mean boss. Oh well, four out of five
isn't bad.
-- Help Wanted Ad, PA newspaper, 1994 Education
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
-- Groucho Marx Life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments.
-- Rose Kennedy He that would have the fruit must climb the tree.
-- Thomas Fuller, M.D. They had a dispute about a night out with the boys. But he finally decided to let her go.
-- Anonymous The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.
-- Thomas Jefferson Education You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
- Sacha Guitry Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an
automobile.
-- Billy Sunday It was very good of God to let Carlyle and Mrs Carlyle marry one another and so make only two people miserable instead of four, besides being very amusing. Education
You can't say civilization isn't advancing: in every war they kill you in a new way.
-- Will Rogers Your goals, minus your doubts, equal your reality.
-- Ralph Marston I have a daughter who goes to SMU. She could've gone to UCLA here in California, but it's one
more letter she'd have to remember.
-- Shecky Greene Society is like a stew. If you don't stir it up every once in a while then a layer of scum floats to the
top.
-- Ed Abbey "Friends can help each other. A true friend is someone who lets you have total freedom to be yourself--and especially to feel. Or, not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at the moment is fine wit Education The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
-- B. F. Skinner I regret that I have but one life to give for my country.
-- Nathan Hale Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
- Elbert Hubbard Education
Integrity is what we do, what we say, and what we say we do.
--Don Galer The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
-- Albert Einstein Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
-- H. L. Mencken It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.
-- Abraham Lincoln Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting someone else to do the work.
-- John G. Pollard Education "Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers." (Socrates) When you see what some girls marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.
-- Helen Rowland Every man knows his follies and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
-- Josh Billings Education
Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.
-- Milton Friedman Assassins!
-- Arturo Toscanini, to his orchestra Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother. -- Ken Dodd Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.
Rabbi Julius Gordon Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull Education Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and
illiterate sport fishermen.
-- P. J. O'Rourke "The most exciting attractions are between two opposites that never meet." (Andy Warhol) "Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily." (Napoleon Bonaparte) Education
The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when
we created them.
- Albert Einstein Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes
some method of fortifying the human soul and enabline it to make its peace with its destiny.
-- George It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous If we may believe our logicians, man is distinguished from all other creatures by the
faculty of laughter.
-- Joseph Addison I was nauseous and tingly all over... I was either in love or I had smallpox.
-- Woody Allen Education The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.
-- ROBERT FROST Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell "This is the first age that's paid much attention to the future, which is a little ironic since we may not have one." (Arthur C. Clarke) Education
Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken The child is the father of the man.
-- William Wordsworth I don't want everyone to like me; I should think less of myself if some people did.
-- Henry James You have to kiss a lot of toads before you find a handsome prince.
-- American Proverb A White House well filled, a little peanut field well tilled, and a wife who will go to the Bronx are
great riches.
-- Poor Jimmy's Almanac Education I like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.
-- Mae West Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
Robert Frost (1874-1963) Education
To keep your marriage brimming
With love in the marriage cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
Whenever you're right, shut up. -- Nash "Hold the fort! I am coming!" (General William Tecumseh Sherman) "The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is granted to the less talented as a consolation prize." (Robert Hughes) Suicide is belated acquiescence in the opinion of one's wife's relatives. All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe Education We have to keep trying things we're not sure we can pull off. If we just do the things we know we
can do... you don't grow as much. You gotta take those chances on making those big mistakes.
-- Cybi To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
- Oscar Wilde Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely
been detected.
-- Oscar Wilde Education
Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.
-- Grace Hansen Lawyers are... operators of the toll bridge which anyone in search of justice must pass.
-- Jane Bryant Quinn He would make a lovely corpse.
- Charles Dickens Dogma is the sacrifice of wisdom to consistency.
- Lewis Perelman It's true that I did get the girl, but then my grandfather always said, "Even a blind chicken finds a
few grains of corn now and then."
-- Lyle Lovett, musician, upon marying actress Julia Roberts, Education "Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few." (George Bernard Shaw) The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw The best teacher is the one who suggests rather than dogmatizes, and inspires his listener with
the wish to teach himself.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Education
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not
there, I go to work.
- Robert Orben Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to
us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
-- Jeff Raskin "I have great faith in fools; My friends call it self-confidence." (Edger Allen Poe) "The want of logic annoys. Too much logic bores. Life eludes logic, and everything that logic alone constructs remains artificial and forced." (André Gide) We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.
-- G. K. Chesterton Education Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount.
-- Clare Boothe Luce Any sufficiently advanced bureaucracy is indistinguishable from molasses.
-- Anon. It ain't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.
-- Will Rogers Education
