"I had discovered that a person does not have to be this or be that or be anything, not even oneself. One is free." (Walker Percy, The Moviegoer) If you don't double-click me, I can't do anything.
-- John Aniston, on how computers have taken over his life Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. Many worthwile careers in the
street-cleansing, fruit-picking and subway-guitar-playing industries have been founded on a lack
of u The first duty of a lecturer: to hand you after an hour's discourse a nugget of pure truth to wrap up
between the pages of your notebooks, and keep on the mantlepiece forever.
-- Virginia Woolf A witty saying proves nothing.
- Voltaire Event Guides Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
- Napoleon Bonaparte If you don't double-click me, I can't do anything.
-- John Aniston, on how computers have taken over his life "When thou art at Rome, do as they do at Rome." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) Event Guides
We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is a false opinion; and if we
were sure, stifling it would be an evil still.
-- John Stuart Mill The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other
is ready.
-- Henry David Thoreau When Michelangelo finished the painting of the Sistine Chapel's ceiling, he spent the rest of his
life trying to remove the paint that had poured into his sleeve.
-- Francois Cavanna The great end of life is not knowledge, but action. What men need is as much knowledge as they
can organize for action; give them more and it may become injurious. Some men are heavy and
stupid from "I never learned from a man who agreed with me." (Robert A. Heinlein) Event Guides "A new baby is like the beginning of all things--wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities." (Eda J. Le Shan) Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an
automobile.
-- Billy Sunday What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
-- Woody Allen Event Guides
God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
-- Voltaire It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
- G. B. Burgin Love cures people, both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.
-- Dr. Karl Menninger "If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.
-- Alphonse Allais Event Guides The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing -- and then marry him.
-- Cher A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their
graves obscure men whom timidity prevented from making a first effort.
-- Sydney Smith blah "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." (Thomas Jefferson) Event Guides
Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them
down people's throats.
-- Howard Aiken "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) I couldn't remember when I had been so disappointed. Except perhaps the time I found out that
M&Ms really do melt in your hand...
-- Peter Oakley Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
-- Marx Groucho, the film "Animal Crackers" The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
-- Anonymous Event Guides You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a firefly and still have room
enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
-- Fred Allen "I praise loudly. I blame softly." (Catherine the Great) Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
-- Albert Einstein Event Guides
... it is certain that the real function of art is to increase our self-consciousness; to make us more
aware of what we are, and therefore of what the universe in which we live really is. And since
The mind has exactly the same power as the hands: not merely to grasp the world, but to change
it.
-- Colin Wilson Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.
-- Lewis Grizzard It takes two to speak truth --One to speak, and another to hear.
-- Henry David Thoreau "When once you have tasted flight you will always walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward: for there you have been and there you will always be." (Henry Van Dyke) Event Guides "It is a curious thing that God learned Greek when he wished to turn author--and that he did not learn it better." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche Event Guides
"Of all mankind the great poet is the equable man." (Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, 1855) "I have great faith in fools; My friends call it self-confidence." (Edger Allen Poe) "Paper should be edible, nutritious. Inks used for printing or writing should have delicious flavors. Magazines or newspapers read at breakfast should be eaten for lunch. Instead of throwing one's mai "I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in grammar." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The telephone company is urging people to *please* not use the telephone unless it is absolutely
necessary in order to keep the lines open for emergency personnel. We'll be right back after this
bre Event Guides Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for the appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George Bernard Shaw The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
-- Richard Braunstein I cannot teach anybody anything, I can only make them think.
-- Socrates Event Guides
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
-- Sam Kinison A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
-- John Ciardi The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is
when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.
-- Marcel Achard Chase after the truth like all hell and you'll free yourself, even though you never touch its
coattails.
-- Clarence Darrow Event Guides At every crossroads on the path that leads to the future, tradition has placed 10,000 men to guard
the past.
-- Maurice Maeterlink I base my fashion sense on what doesn't itch.
-- Gilda Radner "You know that being an American is more than a matter of where your parents came from. It is a belief that all men are created free and equal and that everyone deserves an even break." (Harry S. Tru Event Guides
When looking back, usually I'm more sorry for the things I didn't do than for the things I shouldn't
have done.
-- Malcolm Forbes "I love to doubt as well as know." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) I know nothing about sex, because I was always married.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor She felt in italics and thought in capitals.
-- Henry James "When we are born we cry that we are come to this great stage of fools." (William Shakespeare) Event Guides Viewed from the summit of reason, all life looks like a malignant disease and the world like a
madhouse.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule.
-- Samuel Butler Thank God - every morning when you get up - that you have something to do which must be
done, whether you like it or not. Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you
a hundre Event Guides
I'd marry again if I found a man who had 15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the
marriage and guarantee he'd be dead within a year.
-- Bette Davis Suicide is belated acquiescence in the opinion of one's wife's relatives. Those parts of the system that you can hit with a hammer (not advised) are called hardware;
those program instructions that you can only curse at are called software.
-- Unknown author, Levitating T blah "Ability wins us the esteem of the true men; luck that of the people." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible
by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
- Umberto Eco Event Guides "Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) Oregon Democratic Senate candidate Tom Bruggere, in describing his support for
comprehensive health care during a candidates' forum, said he supported "erection-to-
resurrection" coverage. He later a Hell is other people.
- Jean-Paul Sartre Event Guides
Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.
-- Chinese Proverb The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One
cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the
marvelous str Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
-- John Lehman, Secretary of the Navy, 1981-1987 "If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z, X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut." (Albert Einstein) "To be great is to be misunderstood." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Event Guides You cannot think about thinking, without thinking about thinking about something.
-- Seymour Papert The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing -- and then marry him.
-- Cher The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
-- George Bernard Shaw Event Guides
I am in total control, but don't tell my wife. CAPITAL, n. The seat of misgovernment. That which provides the fire, the pot, the dinner, the
table and the knife and fork for the anarchist; the part of the repast that himself supplies is the
disg The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
-- Lily Tomlin "There is no such thing as a person that nothing has happened to, and each person's story is as different as his fingertips." (Elsa Lanchester) "As is our confidence, so is our capacity." (William Hazlitt) Event Guides I was nauseous and tingly all over... I was either in love or I had smallpox.
-- Woody Allen Good-bye. I am leaving because I am bored.
-- George Saunders - last words It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them.
-- Pierre Augustin de Beaumarchais Event Guides
