The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism
is the equal sharing of miseries.
-- Winston Churchill "To be great is to be misunderstood." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we
respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.
-- H. L. Mencken "Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but
as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!"
-- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady
in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me.
-- Dick Martin Newspapers "Have confidence that if you have done a little thing well, you can do a bigger thing well, too." (David Malcolm Storey) Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it.
-- Baskins Anything is possible, but only a few things actually happen.
-- Richard Rosen Newspapers
A man's reach should exeed his grasp, or else what's a heaven for?
-- Robert Browning A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
-- Navaho saying Nothing is beneath you if it is in the direction of your life.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson "The happy people are failures because they are on such good terms with themselves they don't give a damn." (Agatha Christie) An understanding heart is everything is a teacher, and cannot be esteemed highly enough. One
looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our
human Newspapers The Church is an organism that grows best in an alien society.
-- C. Stacey Woods "The perception of beauty is a moral test." (Henry David Thoreau) My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who work and those who
take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there.
-- INDIRA Newspapers
"Beauty without expression is boring." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.
-- George Bernard Shaw Hell is other people.
- Jean-Paul Sartre In the past decade or so, the women's magazines have taken to running home-handyperson
articles suggesting that women can learn to fix things just as well as men. These articles are
apparently based Nothing has really happened until it has been recorded.
-- Virginia Woolf Newspapers Every act of creation is first an act of destruction.
-- Pablo Picasso "I offer images; I conjure memories of freedom that can still be reached ... But, we can only open the doors. We can't drag people through. I can't free them unless they want to be free--more than any I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
- Mark Twain Newspapers
To be or not to be isn't the question. The question is how to prolong being.
-- Tom Robbins "In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile.
-- Lynda Barry "I met someone on the street who said wasn't it great that we're going to have a movie star for president, that it was so Pop, and (laughs) when you think about it like that, it is great, it's so Amer Newspapers Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
-- Groucho Marx If people turn to look at you on the street, you are not well dressed.
-- Beau Brummel Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same
direction.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry Newspapers
This isn't right, this isn't even wrong.
- Wolfgang Pauli (1900-1958), upon reading a young physicist's paper Everything that can be invented has been invented.
- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899 If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
-- Lily Tomlin Vote for the man who promises least. He'll be the least disappointing.
-- Bernard Baruch Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.
-- Lord Dewar Newspapers In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
-- Gore Vidal When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.
-- Ernest Hemingway Newspapers
We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.
-- Winston Churchill Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and
hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in
Heaven.
-- P. J The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
- Clinton aide George Stephanopolous speaking on Larry King Live Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot It is a product of Einstein's genius -- taking a commonplace observation, combining it with some
simple imaginary experiments, and arriving at a revolutionary conclusion.
-- Clifford M. Wills, 1986 Newspapers "The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing." (John Powell) The remarkable thing about television is that it permits several million people to laugh at the same
joke and still feel lonely.
-- T. S. Eliot Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset Newspapers
Men have become the tools of their tools.
- Henry David Thoreau ( I couldn't remember when I had been so disappointed. Except perhaps the time I found out that
M&Ms really do melt in your hand...
-- Peter Oakley If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
-- Lily Tomlin If people turn to look at you on the street, you are not well dressed.
-- Beau Brummel "One may sometimes tell a lie, but the grimace that accompanies it tells the truth." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Newspapers Why bother with marriage? Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house. Ambition is not a vice of little people.
-- Michel de Montaigne "It is the nature of a man as he grows older, a small bridge in time, to protest against change, particularly change for the better." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) Newspapers
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does
not stop until you get into the office.
-- Robert Frost He had occasional flashes of silence that made his conversation perfectly delightful.
-- Sydney Smith, referring to Macaulay A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway.
-- Fr. Jerome Cummings What's new? Most of my wife. Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.
-- Grace Hansen Newspapers Golf is a good walk spoiled.
-- Mark Twain There are two means of refuge from the misery of life - music and cats.
-- Albert Schweitzer "I'm the artist formally known as Beck. I have a genius wig. When I put that wig on, then the true genius emerges. I don't have enough hair to be a genius. I think you have to have hair going everywhe Newspapers
History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte Free will is a golden thread running through the frozen matrix of fixed events.
-- Robert A. Heinlein _The Rolling Stones_ In all recorded history there has not been one economist who has had to worry about where the
next meal would come from.
-- Peter F. Drucker He had occasional flashes of silence that made his conversation perfectly delightful.
-- Sydney Smith, referring to Macaulay The second half of a man's life is made up of nothing but the habits he has acquired during the
first half.
Fyodor Dostoevsky (1821 - 1881) Newspapers Good judgement comes from experience, and experience--well, that comes from poor judgement.
-- Cousin Woodman "Everywhere one seeks to produce meaning, to make the world signify, to render it visible. We are not, however, in danger of lacking meaning; quite the contrary, we are gorged with meaning and it is k Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside
desperate to get out.
-- Michel de Montaigne Newspapers
My Alma mater was books, a good library . . . . I could spend the rest of my life reading, just
satisfying my curiosity.
--Malcolm X I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.... This is an ex-parrot.
-- John Cleese, Monty Python, British comedy television show Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull "Education is the period during which you are being instructed by somebody you do not know, about something you do not want to know." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) No one finds life worth living; he must make it worth living.
-- Anon. Newspapers The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism. --Heidi Hartmann [The Unhappy The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.
-- Virginia Woolf "I offer images; I conjure memories of freedom that can still be reached ... But, we can only open the doors. We can't drag people through. I can't free them unless they want to be free--more than any Newspapers
Honor's a thing too subtle for wisdom; if honor lie in eating, he's right honorable.
-- Beaumont, Francis "Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) The gods gave man fire and he invented fire engines. They gave him love and he invented marriage. The second half of a man's life is made up of nothing but the habits he has acquired during the
first half.
Fyodor Dostoevsky (1821 - 1881) Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche Newspapers There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
-- George Santayana It was the greatest of the imperfect ventriloquist acts: when his lips moved, her body sang.
-- Tom Robbins "Freedom of press is limited to those who own one." (Henry Louis Mencken) Newspapers
