There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you
yourself have altered.
-- Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble.
-- Elbert Hubbard "I've never let my school interfere with my education." (Mark Twain) The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism
is the equal sharing of miseries.
-- Winston Churchill Love is the delusion that one man or woman differs from another.
-- H. L. Mencken Politics I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.... This is an ex-parrot.
-- John Cleese, Monty Python, British comedy television show Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
-- Carl Friedrich Gauss, when informed that his wife was dying "Let no one be discouraged by the belief there is nothing one person can do against the enormous array of the world's ills, misery, ignorance, and violence. Few will have the greatness to bend history Politics
Marriage is more than four bare legs in a bed.
-- Hoshang N. Akhtar Women and Cats will do as they please. Men and dogs had better get used to it.
-- Robert Heinlein, Time Enough for Love, Lazarus Long I am about to--or I am going to--die; either expression is used.
-- Dominique Bouhours, French grammarian, dying words A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.
-- John Ciardi "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g Politics I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.
-- Wilson Mizner He that would have the fruit must climb the tree.
-- Thomas Fuller, M.D. We can do no great things; only small things with great love.
-- Mother Teresa Politics
Honorable, adj. Afflicted with an impediment in one's reach. In legislative bodies, it is customary
to mention all members as honorable; as, ``the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur.'
-- Bierce, A "If a man does not make new acquaintances as he advances through life, he will soon find himself left alone. A man, sir, should keep his friendship in a constant repair." (Samuel Johnson) Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue.
-- Hermione Gingold The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute
for life.
-- Andrew Brown Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.
-- Josh Billings Politics "Self-confidence is the first requisite for achieving great things." (Samuel Johnson) The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning
it.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan Politics
Ninety percent of the game is half mental.
-- Yogi Berra We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.
-- Decca Recording Company, rejecting the Beatles, 1962 You cannot think about thinking, without thinking about thinking about something.
-- Seymour Papert The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this
is true.
-- James Branch Cabell, The Silver Stallion The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains.The superior teacher demonstrates. The
great teacher inspires.
-- William Arthur Ward Politics You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
-- Indira Gandhi I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in
charge, I believe everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about.
-- Hen "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Politics
In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th "I was lousy in school. Real screwed-up. A moron. I was antisocial and didn't bother with the other kids. A really bad student. I didn't have any brains. I didn't know what I was doing there. That's w This is the fourth?
-- Thomas Jefferson, dying words Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.
-- Oliver Herford During the first period of a man's life the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
-- Soren Kierkegaard Politics Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
-- Anonymous I read the book of Job last night - I don't think God comes out well in it.
-- Virginia Woolf "Oh, the tiger will love you. There is no sincerer love than the love of food." (George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman) Politics
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and
intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
- Galileo Galilei Government is like a baby. An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of
responsibility at the other.
-- Ronald Reagan, Saturday Evening Post, 1965 "Twelve magicians and two carnies have been shot dead doing the bullet catch. That's cool enough, but every night when we close our show with that trick and the loaded gun gets pointed in my face, it Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
-- Aaron Levenstein "Whether it is a black cat or a white cat, as long as it can catch the rat, it is a good cat." (Deng Xiao Ping) Politics "Even death is unreliable. Instead of zero it may be some ghastly hallucination, such as the square root of minus one." (Samuel Beckett) Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
-- Martin Mull Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
-- Steven Wright Politics
He who laughs, lasts.
-- Mary Pettibone Poole I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage.
-- Will Rogers Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
-- Oscar Levant, to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee There are trivial truths, and there are great truths. The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.
The opposite of a great truth is also true.
-- Neils Bohr Journalism is merely history's first draft.
-- Geoffrey C. Ward Politics Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous "Even a stopped clock is right twice a day." (Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach) Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
-- John F. Kennedy Politics
"Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared." (Eddie Rickenbacker) Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.
-- Edward H. Land Everything that is really great and inspiring is created by the individual who can labour in
freedom.
-- Albert Einstein ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Every flower must grow through dirt.
-- Anonymous Politics "If there is something to pardon in everything, there is also something to condemn." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, The Will to Power, 1888) If we let people see that kind of thing, there would never again be any war.
-- Pentagon official, on why US military censored graphic footage from the Gulf War My Alma mater was books, a good library . . . . I could spend the rest of my life reading, just
satisfying my curiosity.
--Malcolm X Politics
The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and
remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't
work and the There are trivial truths, and there are great truths. The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.
The opposite of a great truth is also true.
-- Neils Bohr He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke.
-- Terry Cohen Great ability develops and reveals itself increasingly with every new assignment. Baltasar
Gracian "... and then the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." (Anais Nin) Politics It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
-- Gore Vidal To decide, to be at the level of choice, is to take responsibility for your life and to be in control of
your life.
-- Abbie M. Dale The last good thing written in C++ was the Pachelbel Canon.
-- Jerry Olson Politics
"Give me liberty or give me death." (Patrick Henry) It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them.
-- Pierre Augustin de Beaumarchais Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
-- Carl Gustav Jung As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are
certain, they do not refer to reality.
-- Albert Einstein Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.
-- Lord Dewar Politics Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-- Oscar Wilde In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice which is still very much practiced.
-- Helen Rowland "There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered." (Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom) Politics
To correct a natural indifference I was placed half-way between misery and the sun. Misery kept
me from believing that all was well under the sun, and the sun taught me that history wasn't
everythin Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
-- Samuel Paterson A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
-- Sidney Goff Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
-- Bertrand Russell "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear." (Ambrose Redmoon) Politics Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Why bother with marriage? Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house. Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands, but English women only hope to find in their butlers. -- W. Somerset Maugham Politics
