"The feminists used to say that chivalry and ladyhood were ways of keeping women down and preventing them from standing toe to toe with the guys. Now you've got a lot of women saying that if a guy is If a relationship is to evolve, it must go through a series of endings.
-- Lisa Moriyama Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for
him.
-- Rich Little Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door
and just visit now and then.
-- Katharine Hepburn The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins.
-- Heywood Brown German-Speaking Cantons "Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past." (George Orwell) Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous.
-- Thornton Wilder I do not see the EEC as a great love affair. It is more like nine desperate middle-ages couples with failing marriages meeting at a Brussels hotel for a group grope. -- Tynan German-Speaking Cantons
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.
-- Mark Twain Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains or slavery? Forbid it,
Almighty God! I know not what course others may take but as for me; give me liberty or give me
de "Every Man and every Woman is a Star." (Aleister Crowley) It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain By the time (the Leaning Tower of Pisa) was 10% built, everyone knew it would be a total
disaster. But the investment was so big they felt compelled to go on. Since its completion, it cost
a fortune German-Speaking Cantons "Commit yourself to quality from day one ... it's better to do nothing at all than to do something badly." (Mark McCormack) Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes
some method of fortifying the human soul and enabline it to make its peace with its destiny.
-- George The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
-- Niels Bohr German-Speaking Cantons
He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose
-- Jim Elliott Ninety percent of the game is half mental.
-- Yogi Berra Nothing average ever stood as a monument to progress. When progress is looking for a partner it
doesn't turn to those who believe they are only average. It turns instead to those who are forever
sea A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
-- Christopher Morley Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. German-Speaking Cantons If God does not exist, then everything is permitted.
-- Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Devils "I don't use drugs, my dreams are frightening enough." (M. C. Escher) If I had been around when Rubens was painting, I would have been revered as a fabulous model.
Kate Moss? Well, she would have been the paintbrush...
-- Dawn French German-Speaking Cantons
When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Choose the life that is most useful, and habit will make it the most agreeable.
-- Francis Bacon A White House well filled, a little peanut field well tilled, and a wife who will go to the Bronx are
great riches.
-- Poor Jimmy's Almanac A girl must marry for love and keep on marrying until she finds it.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated.
-- Alec Bourne, A Doctor's Creed German-Speaking Cantons "If you want to make enemies, try to change something." (Woodrow Wilson, 28th US president, 1856-1924) I have a daughter who goes to SMU. She could've gone to UCLA here in California, but it's one
more letter she'd have to remember.
-- Shecky Greene We didn't send you to Washington to make intelligent decisions. We sent you to represent us.
-- Kent York, Baptist minister to US Rep. Bill Sarpalius German-Speaking Cantons
After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.
-- Aldous Huxley I am about to--or I am going to--die; either expression is used.
-- Dominique Bouhours, French grammarian, dying words "A girl can wait for the right man to come along, but in the meantime that still doesn't mean she can't have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones." (Cher) Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.
- Georg Lichtenberg "This is slavery, not to speak one's thought." (Euripides) German-Speaking Cantons A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.
-- Edgar Watson Howe Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't
take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates...
-- Anonymous "Teacher played hooky. Sent message: 'Receiving instruction. Enjoying myself thoroughly. See you next week.'" (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) German-Speaking Cantons
"The masses are far more likely to believe a big lie than several small ones." (Adolf Hitler) I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-- Albert Einstein "Not only is there no guarantee of the temporal immortality of the human soul, that is to say of its eternal survival after death; but, in any case, this assumption completely fails to accomplish the Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the
source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity,
ign Don't be so humble - you are not that great.
- Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat German-Speaking Cantons "It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.
-- Clifton Fadiman Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
-- Albert Einstein German-Speaking Cantons
I read the book of Job last night - I don't think God comes out well in it.
-- Virginia Woolf Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only
hope to find in their butlers.
-- W. Somerset Maugham Work is a four-letter word.
-- The Smiths (Morrissey) "Shared joys make a friend, not shared sufferings." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "We must view young people not as empty bottles to be filled but as candles to be lit." (Robert Shaffer) German-Speaking Cantons Choose a wife by your ear than your eye.
-- Thomas Fuller, 1732 "Once spirit was God, then it became man, and now it is even becoming mob." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) When yer in a funk, people in love are a royal pain in the patookus.
-- Portnoy, character in "Outland," comic strip by Berkely Breathed German-Speaking Cantons
A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes.
-- Joseph Addison Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.
-- Ernie Kovacs All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others.
-- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story The nation's honor is dearer than the nation's comfort; yes, than the nation's life itself.
-- Woodrow Wilson "What dies if freedom lives? What lives if freedom dies?" (Lindsay Anderson, British filmmaker, from if.... (1968) German-Speaking Cantons Whenever I dwell for any length of time on my own shortcomings, they gradually begin to seem
mild harmless, rather engaging little things, not at all like the staring defects in other people's
chara In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice
that I am not a Republican.
-- H. L. Mencken I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
-- Mark Twain German-Speaking Cantons
Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her
have her own way.
-- Anonymous "I never learned from a man who agreed with me." (Robert A. Heinlein) Change before you have to.
-- Jack Welch "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." (Herbert Spencer) German-Speaking Cantons "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Marriage is an institution--but who wants to live in an institution? When yer in a funk, people in love are a royal pain in the patookus.
-- Portnoy, character in "Outland," comic strip by Berkely Breathed German-Speaking Cantons
The most exciting attractions are between two opposites that never meet.
-- Andy Warhol "REASONABLE, adj. Accessible to the infection of our own opinions. Hospitable to persuasion, dissuasion and evasion." (Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary) Many a man has finally succeeded only because he has failed after repeated efforts. If he had
never met defeat he would never have known any great victory.
-- Orison Swett Marden The first clergyman was the first rascal who met the first fool.
-- Voltaire Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like
what you are getting.
-- Anonymous German-Speaking Cantons Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.
-- Aaron Levenstein Self-reliance is the only road to true freedom, and being one's own person is its ultimate reward.
-- Patricia Sampson German-Speaking Cantons
Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
-- Mark Twain The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the
purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
-- Anatole France Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you help them to become what they are
capable of being.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.
- George Bernard Shaw Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue.
-- Virginia Woolf German-Speaking Cantons When one find's oneself in a hole of one's own making, it is a good time to examine the quality of
the workmanship.
-- John Renmerde I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love.
-- Mother Teresa Watching the debate this afternoon it was apparent they loved term limits in the House -- as
Brutus loved Caesar.
-- Bill Moyers German-Speaking Cantons
