Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anonymous "Guard with jealous attention the public liberty. Suspect every one who approaches that jewel. Unfortunately, nothing will preserve it but downright force. Whenever you give up that force, you are ine The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to
contact us.
-- Bill Watterson, in his comic strip Calvin and Hobbes Vote early and vote often.
- Al Capone Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in
a car he sticks his head out the window.
-- Steve Bluestone Novoukrayinka It is most unwise for people in love to marry.
-- George Bernard Shaw I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge.
-- Edward Chilton In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person
must be fired.
-- Conway's Law Novoukrayinka
When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if
I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now
comple By all means marry. If you get a good wife you will become happy, and if you get a bad one you
will become a philosopher.
-- Socrates Politics have no relation to morals.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli If people turn to look at you on the street, you are not well dressed.
-- Beau Brummel "A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you." (Bert Leston Taylor) Novoukrayinka If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith.
-- Albert Einstein "To live is to dream and to die is to awaken." (Anonymous) MARRIAGE, n. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two
slaves, making in all, two.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Novoukrayinka
"As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it." (Dick Cavett) "Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." (Blaise Pascal) If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.
- J. Paul Getty Government is like a baby. An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of
responsibility at the other.
-- Ronald Reagan, Saturday Evening Post, 1965 Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. -- Borge Novoukrayinka My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it. Education is not filling a bucket, but lighting a fire.
-- William Yeats Love is stronger than justice.
-- Sting Novoukrayinka
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious.
-- Albert Einstein True friendship can afford true knowledge. It does not depend on darkness and ignorance.
-- Henry David Thoreau Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times.
-- Jonson, Ben When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.
-- Ernest Hemingway "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Novoukrayinka "I'm the artist formally known as Beck. I have a genius wig. When I put that wig on, then the true genius emerges. I don't have enough hair to be a genius. I think you have to have hair going everywhe Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage,
he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it.
-- Helen Roland Trouble is a part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give the person that loves you
enough chance to love you enough.
-- Dinah Shore Novoukrayinka
When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland "One of the great dangers in having a career is getting bored." (Itzhak Perlman) The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because
generally they are the same people.
-- G. K. Chesterton It is the final proof of God's omnipotence that he need not exist in order to save us.
-- Peter De Vries CAPITAL, n. The seat of misgovernment. That which provides the fire, the pot, the dinner, the
table and the knife and fork for the anarchist; the part of the repast that himself supplies is the
disg Novoukrayinka The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do.
-- Thomas Jefferson If everybody is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking.
-- George S. Patton, Jr. Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
- Henry David Thoreau Novoukrayinka
The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th "Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers." (Socrates) .. I am indebted to the cat for a particular kind of honorable deceit, for a greater control over
myself, for a characteristic aversion to brutal sounds, and for the need to keep silent for long
per The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
-- Robert Benchley The open-minded see the truth in different things: the narrow-minded see only the differences.
-- Author Unknown Novoukrayinka Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
- Napoleon Bonaparte Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind
and understanding. If she says she would like to go out with the Dallas Cowboys, including the
coachin "The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it." (Abbie Hoffman) Novoukrayinka
Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.
-- Lewis Grizzard If you can't annoy somebody, there's little point in writing.
-- Kingsley Amis "The biggest argument against democracy is a five minute discussion with the average voter." (Sir Winston Churchill, 1874-1965) "The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well meaning, but without understanding." (Louis Brandeis) A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
- Sir Winston Churchill Novoukrayinka I drink no more than a sponge.
-- Francis Rabelais, Works. Book i. Chap. v. Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
-- Pancho Villa, dying words "Have confidence that if you have done a little thing well, you can do a bigger thing well, too." (David Malcolm Storey) Novoukrayinka
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wright Generations to come will find it difficult to believe that a man such as Gandhi ever walked the
face of this earth.
-- Albert Einstein "Death where is thy sting? Love, where is thy glory?" (William Shakespeare) "Use what talents you possess; The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." (William Blake) Look not mournfully into the Past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the Present. It is
thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy Future, without fear, and with a manly heart.
-- Henry Wadsworth Lo Novoukrayinka "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) Experience is the worst teacher; it gives the test before presenting the lesson.
-- Vernon Law Everyone believes very easily whatever they fear or desire.
-- Jean de La Fontaine Novoukrayinka
They gave me a book of checks. They didn't ask for any deposits.
-- Joe Early, Congressman (D-Mass), at a press conference to answer questions about the
House Bank scandal To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
- Oscar Wilde Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect, and it is shameful to surrender it too soon or to the first
comer: there is nobility in preserving it coolly and proudly through long youth, until at last Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet
not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?
-- François de La Rouch And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
-- Abraham Lincoln Novoukrayinka The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains.The superior teacher demonstrates. The
great teacher inspires.
-- William Arthur Ward Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.
-- Dwight D. Eisenhower, U.S. President Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing.
-- Oscar Wilde Novoukrayinka
A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
-- Christopher Morley "Murder is the very bed-rock of our social institutions." (Octave Mirbeau, The Torture Garden) If it were weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
-- Rodney Dangerfield "Beauty awakens the soul to act." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux Novoukrayinka A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
-- Carl Sandburg "To avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, be nothing." (Elbert Hubbard, American author, 1856-1915) The story of a love is not important - what is important is that one is capable of love. It is perhaps
the only glimpse we are permitted of eternity.
-- Helen Hayes Novoukrayinka
"There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile.
-- Lynda Barry If we don't change the direction we are going,
We are likely to end up where we are heading.
-- Chinese saying Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame.
-- Laurence J. Peter Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous.
-- Thornton Wilder Novoukrayinka When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the
problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
- Buckminster Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by heart and his friends can
only read the title.
-- Virginia Woolf A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no
religious basis is necessary. Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear
of Novoukrayinka
