Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks To realize that you do not understand is a virtue;
Not to realize that you do not understand is a defect.
--Lao-Tzu, "Tao Teh Ching" The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance A problem is a chance for you to do your best.
-- Buke Ellington I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
-- Mae West X Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree
to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. you only need a heart full
of grac Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
-- Mae West I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
-- Bill Hoest X
"Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil) The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.
-- ROBERT FROST I prefer the wicked rather than the foolish. The wicked sometimes rest.
-- Alexandre Dumas pere They think they can make fuel from horse manure.... Now, I don't know if your car will be able to
get 30 miles to the gallon, but it's sure gonna put a stop to siphoning.
-- Billie Holliday The time is always right to do what is right.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. X And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly,
what is essential is invisible to the eye.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupery Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think.
-- Anon. Love is shown in your deeds, not in your words.
-- Fr. Jerome Cummings X
I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha I think one of the reasons I'm popular again is because I'm wearing a tie. You have to be different.
-- Tony Bennett, 1995 We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person
perfectly.
-- Anonymous There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never
were, and ask why not?
-- Robert Francis Kennedy "When once you have tasted flight you will always walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward: for there you have been and there you will always be." (Henry Van Dyke) X Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for
appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George bernard Shaw Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious.
-- Oscar Wilde A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
-- Michel de Montaigne X
"Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something." (Plato, 427 BC-348) A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
- Helen Rowland blah "Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together." (Vincent van Gogh) Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the
unpalatable.
-- John Kenneth Galbraith May you be too good for the world and not good enough for your wife. X The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th The best theology would need no advocates; it would prove itself.
-- Karl Barth A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde X
The real questions are the ones that obtrude upon your consciousness whether you like it or not,
the ones that make your mind start vibrating like a jackhammer, the ones that you 'come to terms
with May you never leave your marriage alive. Women are the only exploited group in history to have been idealized into powerlessness.
-- Erica Jong We need the iron qualities that go with true manhood. We need the positive virtues of resolution,
of courage, of indomitable will, of power to do without shrinking the rough work that must always
be Feeding the hungry is a greater work than raising the dead.
-- Saint John Chrysostom X The great end of life is not knowledge, but action. What men need is as much knowledge as they
can organize for action; give them more and it may become injurious. Some men are heavy and
stupid from "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Nuns: Women who marry God. If they divorce Him, do they get half the universe? X
Experience is the worst teacher; it gives the test before presenting the lesson.
-- Vernon Law Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
-- B. F. Skinner Journalism is merely history's first draft.
-- Geoffrey C. Ward Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it.
Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it.
Hatred darkens life; love illumines it.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. X "Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil) "Twelve magicians and two carnies have been shot dead doing the bullet catch. That's cool enough, but every night when we close our show with that trick and the loaded gun gets pointed in my face, it We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.
-- Winston Churchill X
"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.
-- Anonymous Better to have loved a short man than never to have loved a tall.
-- David Chambless X You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true.
-- Richard Bach The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order.
-- Brian Pickrell "Whether it is a black cat or a white cat, as long as it can catch the rat, it is a good cat." (Deng Xiao Ping) X
Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt.
-- Herbert Hoover Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can
never tell.
-- Joan Crawford University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
-- Henry Kissinger I have been attacked by Rush Limbaugh on the air, an experience somewhat akin to being
gummed by a newt. It doesn't actually hurt, but it leaves you with slimy stuff on your ankle.
-- Molly Ivins You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
-- Mark Twain X The real test of friendship is: Can you literally do nothing with the other person? Can you enjoy
together those moments of life that are utterly simple? They are the moments people looks back
on at "What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Give the people not hell, but hope and courage.
-- John Murray X
Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.
-- Benjamin Franklin Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter.
-- Cecilia Egan Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
-- Igor Stravinsky Despite the high cost of living it remains a popular item.
-- Anonymous As always, victory finds a hundred fathers but defeat is an orphan.
-- Count Galeazzo Ciano, The Ciano Diaries X The best theology would need no advocates; it would prove itself.
-- Karl Barth The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a
lot less.
-- Brendon Behan We have art to save ourselves from the truth.
- Friedrich Nietzsche X
"Even a stopped clock is right twice a day." (Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach) "A man is only as faithful as his opportunity." (Chris Rock) "Bread feeds the body, indeed, but flowers feed also the soul." (The Prophet Mohammad) One can survive everything, nowadays, except death, and live down everything except a good
reputation.
-- Oscar Wilde The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw X When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if
I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now
comple Not to anticipate is already to moan.
-- Leonardo da Vinci I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
- e e cummings X
A witty saying proves nothing.
- Voltaire Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
- Will Durant The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have
to shave twice a day.
-- Adlai Stevenson "A man who flies from his fear may find he has only taken a shortcut to meet it." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness.
-- Sigmund Freud X Live truth instead of professing it.
-- Elbert Hubbard "Ugliness is in a way superior to beauty because it lasts." (Serge Gainsbourg) Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.
-- Rose Franken X
