Kerrang! Awards 2003 - BBC Radio 1's The Rock Show awards. Includes news, reviews, nominations and winners.
The Madeline Finden Memorial Trust - Offers discretionary awards annually to classical singers aged 20 - 32 years old. Auditions will be held in London in September.
Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
- Irving Kristol I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
-- Henny Youngman The empires of the future are the empires of the mind.
-- Winston Churchill "Excellence is in the details. Give attention to the details and excellence will come." (Perry Paxton) Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in
accordance with the dictates of reason.
-- Oscar Wilde Awards In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th "I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you and education." (Wilson Mizner) "I had discovered that a person does not have to be this or be that or be anything, not even oneself. One is free." (Walker Percy, The Moviegoer) Awards
Tear open packet, unfold and use.
-- Directions on moist towelette package In the end, everything is a gag.
-- Charlie Chaplin All marriages are happy--it's the living together afterward that causes all the problems. We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. -- Groucho Marx Now is the time for all good men to come to.
-- Walt Kelly Awards He who laughs, lasts.
-- Mary Pettibone Poole "We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police." (Jeff Marder) See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails?
-- Will Rogers, to his niece on seeing the Venus de Milo Awards
It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.
-- Abraham Lincoln I would have made a good Pope.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President I skate to where the puck is going to be, not to where it has been.
-- Wayne Gretzky I would rather live and love where death is king than have eternal life where love is not.
-- Robert G. Ingersoll I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
-- Will Rogers Awards Luck is the residue of design.
- Branch Rickey - former owner of the Brooklyn Dodger Baseball Team Marriage is an institution--but who wants to live in an institution? The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.
-- Virginia Woolf Awards
"I think people resist freedom because they're afraid of the unknown. But it's ironic....That unknown was once very well known. It's where are souls belong....The only solution is to confront them--co Of the seven dwarves, only Dopey had a shaven face. This should tell us something about the
custom of shaving.
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All The real test of friendship is: Can you literally do nothing with the other person? Can you enjoy
together those moments of life that are utterly simple? They are the moments people looks back
on at "I have learned that to be with those I like is enough." (Walt Whitman) He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
-- Bertolt Brecht Awards If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie The gods too are fond of a joke.
-- Aristotle "No one ever owns his youth or the women he loves." (Pedro Almodóvar, Live Flesh) Awards
Musical people always want one to be perfectly dumb at the very moment when one is longing to
be perfectly deaf.
-- Oscar Wilde We never reflect how pleasant it is to ask for nothing.
-- Seneca "Well begun is half done." (Aristotle) I was a pilot flying an airplane and it just so happened that where I was flying made what I was
doing spying.
-- Francis Gary Power, U-2 reconnaissance pilot held by the Soviets for spying, in an i Politics have no relation to morals.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli Awards They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so
brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind.
-- Cindy Crawford, supermodel Never go to bed angry. Stay up and fight.
-- Phyllis Diller You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
-- Henny Youngman Awards
There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a
natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves Lawyers are... operators of the toll bridge which anyone in search of justice must pass.
-- Jane Bryant Quinn Not to anticipate is already to moan.
-- Leonardo da Vinci People only see what they are prepared to see.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Awards Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add
up.
-- Anon Whenever I dwell for any length of time on my own shortcomings, they gradually begin to seem
mild harmless, rather engaging little things, not at all like the staring defects in other people's
chara He who awaits much can expect little.
-- Gabriel Garcia Marquez Awards
"A new baby is like the beginning of all things--wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities." (Eda J. Le Shan) Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
-- Marx Groucho, the film "Animal Crackers" The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.
-- Jilly Cooper We do not remember days; we remember moments.
-- Anonymous Never eat more than you can lift.
-- Miss Piggy, character on "The Muppet Show," U.S. television show Awards "Even death is unreliable. Instead of zero it may be some ghastly hallucination, such as the square root of minus one." (Samuel Beckett) You cannot think about thinking, without thinking about thinking about something.
-- Seymour Papert "Nothing has been purchased more dearly than the little bit of reason and sense of freedom which now constitutes our pride." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Awards
"He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself." (Thomas Paine) Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
-- Groucho Marx Beneath the rule of men entirely great, / The pen is mightier than the sword.
-- Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton, Richelieu, II. ii The English country gentleman galloping after a fox--the unspeakable in full pursuit of the
uneatable.
-- Oscar Wilde "The intellect is always fooled by the heart." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) Awards Seeing much, suffering much, and studying much, are the three pillars of learning.
-- Benjamin Disraeli Love thy neighbor, but make sure her husband is away first. Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the
time by watching the second hand of a clock.
-- Ben Hecht Awards
The honest poor can sometimes forget poverty. The honest rich can never forget it.
-- G. K. Chesterton "Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments." (Anonymous) I have lost friends, some by death, others through sheer inability to cross the street.
-- Virginia Woolf I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.
-- Gandhi I sometimes think that God, in creating man, overestimated His ability.
-- Oscar Wilde Awards If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to take it off of you." (Francois Sagan) "Employees make the best dates. You don't have to pick them up and they're always tax-deductible." (Andy Warhol, Andy Warhol's Exposures, 1980) Awards
We never reflect how pleasant it is to ask for nothing.
-- Seneca Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they're yours.
- Richard Bach Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes
unpunished.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-- Albert Einstein Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out. Awards He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke.
-- Terry Cohen It takes two to speak truth --One to speak, and another to hear.
-- Henry David Thoreau "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." (George Carlin) Awards
"There is nothing more fearful than ignorance in action." (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, 1749-1832, Criticisms, Reflections and Maxims) The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-- Albert Einstein "In some ways, I never outgrew my adolescence. I wake up in the morning and think, 'Oh my God, I'm late for a math test!' But then I say, 'Wait a minute. I'm 40.'" (Daniel Clowes) "Not only is there no guarantee of the temporal immortality of the human soul, that is to say of its eternal survival after death; but, in any case, this assumption completely fails to accomplish the "Conform and be dull." (J. Frank Doble) Awards Anyone nit-picking enough to write a letter of correction to an editor doubtless deserves the error
that provoked it.
-- Alvin Toffler Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue.
-- Virginia Woolf The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
-- Richard Braunstein Awards
