"The rules for parents are but three... Love, Limit, and Let them be." (Elaine M. Ward) Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
-- Oscar Wilde "Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal." (Leo Tolstoy, 1828-1910) The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
-- Albert Einstein There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
-- Will Rogers Change Machines The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
-- General George Patton My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it.
-- Buddy Hackett Matters of religion should never be matters of controversy. We neither argue with a lover about
his taste, not condemn him, if we are just, for knowing so human a passion.
-- George Santayana Change Machines
The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one
is.
-- Arnold Bennett A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
-- Walter Winchell "The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them
down people's throats.
-- Howard Aiken In the early sixties, we were strong, we were virulent...
-- John Connally, Secretary of Treasury under Richard Nixon, in an early 70s speech, as reported
in a contemporary "American Scholar" Change Machines "Men act and women appear. Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at." (John Berger) "When a hundred men stand together, each of them loses his mind and gets another one." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
-- Colin Greene Change Machines
Marriage is a rest period between romances. Where there is an unknowable there is a promise.
-- Thornton Wilder Before marraige a man will like awake all night thinking about something you said. After marriage
he will fall asleep before you have finished saying it.
-- Anon. Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet
not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?
-- François de La Rouch The closer I'm bound in love to you, the closer I am to free.
-- Indigo Girls, song lyric Change Machines In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice
that I am not a Republican.
-- H. L. Mencken The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious.
-- Albert Einstein Don't anthropomorphize computers -- they hate it.
-- Anonymous Change Machines
The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal consistency of the women who
love me.
-- George Bernard Shaw Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
- Voltaire (1694-1778) on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan. Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day.
-- Thornton Wilder "The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it." (Abbie Hoffman) Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. Change Machines America's one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.
-- Bobcat Goldthwait "A man who flies from his fear may find he has only taken a shortcut to meet it." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Vote for the man who promises least. He'll be the least disappointing.
-- Bernard Baruch Change Machines
Twenty years fron now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones
you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in
your Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
-- Igor Stravinsky Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows
how to make us disobedient.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 "Ah! Don't say you agree with me. When people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong." (Oscar Wilde) Change Machines If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it with a computer.
-- Anon. Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to
take away.
- Antoine de Saint Exupery The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved.
-- Mother Teresa Change Machines
The multitude is always in the wrong.
-- Wentworth Dillon, Earl of Roscommon, 1684 I envy people who drink -- at least they know what to blame everything on.
-- Oscar Levant I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with
typewriters.
- Frank Lloyd Wright I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.
-- Nancy Mitford My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it.
-- Abraham Lincoln Change Machines There is a courtesy of the heart; it is allied to love. From it springs the purest courtesy in the
outward behavior.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe To the ass, or the sow, their own offspring appears the fairest in creation.
-- Latin Proverb I shall return.
-- General Douglas MacArthur Change Machines
ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony.
-- Oliver Herford What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words I was nauseous and tingly all over... I was either in love or I had smallpox.
-- Woody Allen I'll sleep when I'm dead.
- Warren Zevon Change Machines "Mothers spend a lifetime excising from their sons the influence of their fathers." (Arthur Lotti) All you need is love.
-- The Beatles, song title If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.
- J. Paul Getty Change Machines
"Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing." (Oscar Wilde) He didn't say that. He was reading what was given to him in a speech.
-- Richard Darman, director of OMB, explaining why President Bush wasn't following up on his
campaign pledge that there would be Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a losttradition.
-- Jacques Barzun "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried.
-- G. K. Chesterton Change Machines There is no sincerer love than the love of food.
-- George Bernard Shaw Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec If everybody is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking.
-- George S. Patton, Jr. Change Machines
I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put
over my kitchen table.
-- Rodney Dangerfield My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. "The perception of beauty is a moral test." (Henry David Thoreau) My Alma mater was books, a good library . . . . I could spend the rest of my life reading, just
satisfying my curiosity.
--Malcolm X To believe in something, and not to live it, is dishonest.
-- Ghandi Change Machines The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is
not read.
-- Oscar Wilde ...the fog is rising.
-- Emily Dickinson, dying words Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.
-- Virginia Woolf Change Machines
It's no credit to anyone to work to hard.
-- Ed Howe Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.
-- Ernest Hemingway I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
-- Woody Allen The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious.
-- Albert Einstein Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. Change Machines "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with
the buttered side down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat; the 2 will hover,
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." (Albert Einstein) Change Machines
"Paper should be edible, nutritious. Inks used for printing or writing should have delicious flavors. Magazines or newspapers read at breakfast should be eaten for lunch. Instead of throwing one's mai How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create
it herself.
- Anais Nin Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the
writing will be just as it should be.
-- Mark Twain Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
-- Will Rogers "Is life not a thousand times too short for us to bore ourselves?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Change Machines "REASONABLE, adj. Accessible to the infection of our own opinions. Hospitable to persuasion, dissuasion and evasion." (Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary) You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.
-- Ziggy, character in comic strip by Tom Wilson Luck is the residue of design.
- Branch Rickey - former owner of the Brooklyn Dodger Baseball Team Change Machines
