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Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl could want in her life, except for good
taste in men!
-- Wedding Toast The gods gave man fire and he invented fire engines. They gave him love and he invented marriage. The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One
cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the
marvelous str Wind is to fire like distance is to love; it extinguishes the small and enflames the great.
-- Anonymous For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault Directories "There is no sin except stupidity." (Oscar Wilde) A teacher is one who makes himself progressively unnecessary.
-- Thomas Carruthers Soul meets soul on lovers lips.
-- Percy Bysshe Shelley Directories
Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.
-- Oscar Wilde I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal "Club Secretary: I say, Lawrence. You are a clown!
Lawrence: We can't all be lion tamers." (Thomas Edward Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) That's the nature of research--you don't know what in hell you're doing.
-- 'Doc' Edgerton I was going to change my shirt, but I changed my mind instead.
-- Winnie the Pooh Directories It takes a great deal of history to produce a little literature.
-- Henry James A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands. -- Guitry Not everything that can be counted counts; and not everything that counts can be counted.
-- Albert Einstein Directories
Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken To travel hopefully is a better thing than to arrive, and the true success is to labour.
-- Robert L. Stevenson Never regard study as a duty, but as the enviable opportunity to learn to know the liberating
influence of beauty in the realm of the spirit for your own personal joy and to the profit of the
commun Like a prune, you are not getting any better looking, but you are getting sweeter.
-- N. D. Stice Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
-- T. S. Eliot Directories She felt in italics and thought in capitals.
-- Henry James If we don't change the direction we are going,
We are likely to end up where we are heading.
-- Chinese saying If we don't change the direction we are going,
We are likely to end up where we are heading.
-- Chinese saying Directories
I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
- Ian L. Fleming It depends on your definition of asleep. They were not stretched out. They had their eyes closed.
They were seated at their desks with their heads in a nodding position.
-- John Hogan, Commonwealth "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." (William Blake) I have read your book and much like it.
-- Moses Hadas, book reviewer It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen Directories "Have love for your friend up to a limit for it is possible he may turn into your enemy some day; and hate your enemy up to a limit for it is possible he may turn into your friend some day." (Ali bin >From error to error one discovers the entire truth.
-- Sigmund Freud You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they
do.
-- Olin Miller Directories
"A thing of beauty is a joy forever." (John Keats) A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the
time by watching the second hand of a clock.
-- Ben Hecht If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
-- Johnny Carson This world is a comedy for those who think and a tragedy for those who feel.
-- Horace Walpole Directories I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
-- Carol Leifer We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.
-- Decca Recording Company, rejecting the Beatles, 1962 "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships." (Sharon Stone) Directories
"Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em." (William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night, II:5) "The reward of a thing well done is having done it." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) "O' What may man within him hide, though angel on the outward side!" (William Shakespeare) The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I
have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
-- George Bernard Shaw Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i Directories "If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there is an instinct for freedom, there are opportunities to change things, there's a chance for you t ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Grove giveth and Gates taketh away.
- Bob Metcalfe (inventor of Ethernet) on the trend of hardware speedups not being able to keep
up with software demands Directories
"You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question." (Albert Camus, The Fall) Courage is the price that Love exacts for granting peace.
-- Amelia Earhart Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw We have children because we want immortality and this is the most reliable way of getting it.
-- Woodrow Wyatt Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
- H. G. Wells Directories The first duty of love is to listen.
-- Paul Tillich Work is the refuge of people who have nothing better to do.
-- Oscar Wilde Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
-- Karl Marx, dying words to his housekeeper Directories
Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside
desperate to get out.
-- Michel de Montaigne You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.
-- Beverly Sills The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal consistency of the women who
love me.
-- George Bernard Shaw "It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) I think there are only three things America will be known for 2,000 years from now when they
study this civilization: the Constitution, jazz music, and baseball.
-- Gerald Early, writer, baseball do Directories It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
- Albert Einstein NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows
how to make us disobedient.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.
- George Bernard Shaw Directories
Chase after the truth like all hell and you'll free yourself, even though you never touch its
coattails.
-- Clarence Darrow "If it doesn't matter who wins or loses, then why do they keep score?" (Vince Lombardi) The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going
to make fun of you.
-- Woody Allen I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
- Mark Twain This delivery driver carries no money. His wife has it all. Directories A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top.
-- James Reston Once a boy becomes a man, he's a man all his life, but a woman is only sexy until she becomes
your wife.
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show The mistakes are all waiting to be made.
- chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956) on the game's opening position Directories
Destiny is not a matter of chance; but a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, It is a
thing to be acheived.
-- William Jennings Bryant For I am a bear of very little brain and long words bother me.
-- Winnie the Pooh, character from author A. A. Milne You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.
-- Dolly Parton My mother-in-law broke up my marriage. My wife came home from work one day and found me in
bed with her.
-- Lenny Bruce I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
-- Sam Kinison Directories "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
-- George Bernard Shaw Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. Directories
Men have become the tools of their tools.
-- Henry David Thoreau The more we do, the more we can do; the more busy we are the more leisure we have.
-- William Hazlitt Honor the ocean of love.
-- George de Benneville blah "This is the hardest of all: to close the open hand out of love, and keep modest as a giver." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) There is nothing that can be said by mathematical symbols and relations which cannot also be
said by words. The converse, however, is false. Much that can be and is said by words cannot
successfully Directories A kitten is chiefly remarkable for rushing about like mad at nothing whatever, and generally
stopping before it gets there.
-- Agnes Repplier To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven.
-- Karen Sunde Diplomat: A man who can convince his wife she would look stout in a fur coat. Directories
