Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
-- Josh Billings "The evil that men do lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones." (William Shakespeare, Julius Cĉsar. Act iii. Sc. 2.) Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.
-- Margaret Mead "I put on an act sometimes, and people think I'm insensitive. Really, it's like a kind of armor because I'm too sensitive. If there are two hundred people in a room and one of them doesn't like me, I' I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put
over my kitchen table.
-- Rodney Dangerfield D However, never daunted, I will cope with adversity in my usual manner...sulking and nausea.
-- Tom K. Ryan Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
-- Helen Keller "I have the terrible feeling that, because I am wearing a white beard and am sitting in the back of the theatre, you expect me to tell you the truth about something. These are the cheap seats, not Mou D
Weaseling out of things is good. It's what separates us from the other animals....except weasels.
-- Homer Simpson, character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show "Drugs have done a lot of good. A lot of good songs have been written. 'Penny Lane' is worth 10 dead kids. 'Dark Side of the Moon?' 100 dead kids. At least that many were conceived by people listening The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I
have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
- George Bernard Shaw When we treat man as he is, we make him worse than he is; when we treat him as if he already
were what he potentially could be, we make him what he should be.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe "We must view young people not as empty bottles to be filled but as candles to be lit." (Robert Shaffer) D There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a
natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend My religion consists of a humble admiration of the unlimitable superior who reveals Himself in the
slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble minds. That deeply emotional
convi Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
-- John F. Kennedy D
Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and
hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in
Heaven.
-- P. J "People demand freedom only when they have no power." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "The purpose of Compulsory Education is to deprive the common people of their commonsense." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) Truth must necessarily be stranger than fiction, for fiction is the creation of the human mind and
therefore congenial to it.
-- G. K. Chesterton Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec D Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.
-- Anne Morrow Lindbergh Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.
-- Irwin Corey Anything is possible, but only a few things actually happen.
-- Richard Rosen D
Every man knows his follies and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
-- Josh Billings "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so
brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind.
-- Cindy Crawford, supermodel A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats.
-- Anonymous You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true.
-- Richard Bach D What's new? Most of my wife. Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
-- Anonymous He who laughs last thinks slowest.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker D
"The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing." (John Powell) My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no
character.
-- Charles Barkley, on hearing Tonya Harding proclaim herself "the Charles Barkley of fig Love: An obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage. your daughters marry men of substance: gypsies with two bears. Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
-- Abraham Lincoln D What we anticipate seldom occurs: but what we least expect generally happens.
-- Benjamin Disraeli If you want to sing out, sing out, and if you want to be free, be free, 'cause there's a million ways
to be, you know that there are...
-- Cat Stevens, from a song lyric No race can prosper till it learns that there is as much dignity in tilling a field as in writing a poem.
-- Booker T. Washington D
After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.
-- Aldous Huxley Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.
- Mark Twain The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going
to make fun of you.
-- Woody Allen Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her
have her own way.
-- Anonymous Just buy a box of popcorn and a Coca-Cola and sit back and watch.
-- James Carville, Clinton advisor, offering advice for Democrats on the term-limits vote in the
House D The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can
decide that nothing can be done.
-- Fred Allen I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with naked fat
people.
-- Ed Bluestone D
People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election.
-- Otto von Bismarck I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
-- Douglas Adams Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked
where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
-- D. H. Lawrence Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains or slavery? Forbid it,
Almighty God! I know not what course others may take but as for me; give me liberty or give me
de And in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make.
-- The Beatles, The last lyric of their last song D In medieval times, people thought that evil spirits could enter a person through an open mouth.
These days they more often leave that way.
-- David Deckert Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one
thing.
-- Abraham Lincoln then the world 's mine oyster
-- William Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor D
Beginning in February 1976 your assistance benefits will be discontinued ... Reason: it has been
reported to our office that you expired on January 1, 1976.
-- excerpt from a letter, Illinois Depart A person should never be ashamed to own that he is wrong, which is but saying in other words
that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.
-- Alexander Pope Republican boys date Democratic girls. They plan to marry Republican girls, but feel they're
entitled to a little fun first.
-- Anonymous The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same
time, and still retain the ability to function.
-- F. Scott Fitzgerald "Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Walk beside me and just be my friend." (Albert Camus) D He had occasional flashes of silence that made his conversation perfectly delightful.
-- Sydney Smith, referring to Macaulay In the spider-web of facts, many a truth is strangled.
-- Paul Eldridge "Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) D
A weed is no more than a flower in disguise.
-- James Lowell My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
-- Christopher Morley "Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet." (Mae West) Even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim
poses.
-- John Weitz, American Designer I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again.
-- Bart Simpson, young character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show D Marriage is like a cage--one sees the birds outside desperate to get in and those inside equally
desparate to get out.
-- Di Peatlins "Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills." (Minna Antrim) "Some look at things that are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not?" (George Bernard Shaw) D
The person who is slowest in making a promise is most faithful in its performance.
-- Jean-Jacques Rousseau I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.
- Steven Wright "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." (Albert Einstein) I am about to--or I am going to--die; either expression is used.
-- Dominique Bouhours, French grammarian, dying words "Nothing touches a work of art so little as words of criticism: they always result in more or less fortunate misunderstandings." (Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet) D This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but hurled with great force.
-- Dorothy Parker Feeding the hungry is a greater work than raising the dead.
-- Saint John Chrysostom Now is the time for all good men to come to.
-- Walt Kelly D
"In my opinion, the greatest single failure of American education is that students come away unable to distinguish between a symbol and the thing the symbol stands for." (Paul Lutus) The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth which it
prevents you from achieving.
-- Russell Green I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.
- Irvin S. Cobb "We already have the statistics for the future: the growth percentages of pollution, overpopulation, desertification. The future is already in place." (Günther Grass, Winner of the Nobel Prize for Li Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
- Saint Augustine D What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words Men have become the tools of their tools.
- Henry David Thoreau ( If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
-- Aristotle Onassis D
