The difference between false memories and true ones is the same as for jewels: it is always the
false ones that look the most real, the most brilliant.
-- Salvador Dali Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed.
-- Oscar Wilde This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises,
promotions, and other signs of appreciation.
-- Anonymous He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
- H. H. Munro (Saki) Time is at once the most valuable and most perishable of all our possessions.
-- John Randolph Fitness I hate women because they always know where things are.
-- James Thurber Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available.
-- Jim Beggs "Transport of the mails, transport of the human voice, transport of flickering pictures--in this century as in others our highest accomplishments still have the single aim of bringing men together." Fitness
Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing
popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.
-- Dave Barry "We must view young people not as empty bottles to be filled but as candles to be lit." (Robert Shaffer) No one finds life worth living; he must make it worth living.
-- Anon. It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
-- Clarence Darrow Fitness Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones.
-- Phillip Brooks I don't mind if you don't like my manners. I don't like them myself. They're pretty bad. I grieve over
them on long winter evenings.
-- Humphrey Bogart to Lauren Bacall, in "The Big Sleep" "When we are born we cry that we are come to this great stage of fools." (William Shakespeare) Fitness
You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.
-- Dolly Parton My father was a minister. I had to make up for the lack of sin.
-- Milwuakee mayor, on why he became a politician A good cook is like a sorceress who dispenses happiness.
-- Elsa Schiapirelli Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures.
-- Samuel Johnson "Children spell love...T-I-M-E." (Dr. Anthony P. Witham) Fitness "No man is clever enough to know all the evil he does." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) "I met someone on the street who said wasn't it great that we're going to have a movie star for president, that it was so Pop, and (laughs) when you think about it like that, it is great, it's so Amer "Dream as if you'll live forever; live as if you'll die tomorrow." (James Dean) Fitness
"Murder is the very bed-rock of our social institutions." (Octave Mirbeau, The Torture Garden) "I consider it the highest compliment when my employees go out and start their own companies in competition with me. I always send them a plant to wish them well. Of course, it's a cactus." (Norman B Men have become the tools of their tools.
- Henry David Thoreau ( "As is our confidence, so is our capacity." (William Hazlitt) Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
- H. G. Wells Fitness "Some people must go to extremes to get the world in balance for themselves. Some can't bear bright lights, so wherever they go they search for the dark; they turn the lights down, anything to sustain People may or may not say what they mean ... but they always say something designed to get
what they want.
-- David Mamet "Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Fitness
Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.
-- Anne Morrow Lindbergh "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
-Robert Frost (1874-1963) Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together....
-- Carl Zwanzig If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf Fitness No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in.
-- Anon. A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend upon the support of Paul.
-- George Bernard Shaw "Bread feeds the body, indeed, but flowers feed also the soul." (The Prophet Mohammad) Fitness
The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.
-- Franklin D. Roosevelt Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately
becomes consumed by distasteful sexual fantasies which involve doing uncomfortable things in
those tiny toil His ignorance is encyclopedic
- Abba Eban A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
-- Marvin Kitman "The concerned investment banker is the one who blows the horn on his Mercedes as he drives through a red light." (Anonymous) Fitness "The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." (Franklin Delano Roosevelt, 1882 - 1945, 32nd U.S. President) "Mothers spend a lifetime excising from their sons the influence of their fathers." (Arthur Lotti) Fitness
The church must be the critic and guide of the state, and never its tool.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. "A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools." (Douglas Adams) We seek the comfort of another. Someone to share and share the life we choose. Someone to
help us through the neverending attempt to understand ourselves. And in the end, someone to
comfort us along There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
-- Oscar Wilde "I consider it the highest compliment when my employees go out and start their own companies in competition with me. I always send them a plant to wish them well. Of course, it's a cactus." (Norman B Fitness The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.
-- Blaise Pascal, Pens&eactue;es, trans. A.J. Krailsheimer Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.
- Auric Goldfinger, in Goldfinger by Ian L. Fleming The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
-- Anonymous Fitness
Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the national debt.
-- Herbert Hoover Whining is not only graceless, but can be dangerous. It can alert a brute that a victim is in the
neighborhood.
-- Maya Angelou Celestial navigation is based on the premise that the Earth is the center of the universe. The
premise is wrong, but the navigation works. An incorrect model can be a useful tool.
-- Kelvin Throop I "The man who never made a mistake never made anything." (Derek Longdon, Tongariro Power Development, Turangi, New Zealand) It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
-- Tom Robbins, Still Life With Woodpecker Fitness "All grown-ups were once children, though few of them remember it." (Antoine de Saint Exupéry) Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and
retaliation. the foundation of such a method is love.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. He who kisses the joy is it flies lives in eternity's sunrise
-- William Blake Fitness
Obedience is the gateway through which knowledge, yes, and love, too, enter the mind of the
child.
-- Anne Sullivan Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance
- Oscar Wilde Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before
marriage, which is never advisable.
-- Oscar Wilde I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a
woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Fitness Hey, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!
-- Dr. Strangelove When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.
-- Ernest Hemingway That government is best which governs least.
-- Henry David Thoreau, Civil Disobedience, 1849 Fitness
"Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few." (George Bernard Shaw) The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by
trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by l I know nothing about sex, because I was always married.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
- Frank Zappa Fitness We never live; we are always in the expectation of living.
-- Voltaire No wonder nobody comes here--it's too crowded.
-- Yogi Berra "If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there is an instinct for freedom, there are opportunities to change things, there's a chance for you t Fitness
"... adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, quoted in his obituary, Time) The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.
-- Blaise Pascal, Pens&eactue;es, trans. A.J. Krailsheimer UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 If you want a place in the sun, you've got to put up with a few blisters.
-- Abigail Van Buren Experience is the worst teacher; it gives the test before presenting the lesson.
-- Vernon Law Fitness "All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his." (Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest) If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
- Will Rogers If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams Fitness
