Reason can answer questions, but imagination has to ask them.
-- Ralph N. Gerard CAPITAL, n. The seat of misgovernment. That which provides the fire, the pot, the dinner, the
table and the knife and fork for the anarchist; the part of the repast that himself supplies is the
disg First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
- Mahatma Gandhi There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
- Frank Zappa Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.
-- Michael Leunig Clewer "Ninety percent of my salary I spent on booze and women ... and the other ten percent I wasted." (Tug McGraw, Major League Baseball pitcher) I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
-- William Butler Yeats, from "He wishes for the cloths of heaven" "I never resist temptation, because I have found that things that are bad for me do not tempt me." (George Bernard Shaw) Clewer
Great eaters and great sleepers are incapable of anything else that is great.
-- William Shakespeare, Henry IV "I praise loudly. I blame softly." (Catherine the Great) "Character is determined more by the lack of certain experiences than by those one has had." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Fanaticism consists of redoubling your efforts when you have forgotten your aim.
-- George Santayana "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) Clewer Sex is like bridge: If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
-- Charles Pierce "I was lousy in school. Real screwed-up. A moron. I was antisocial and didn't bother with the other kids. A really bad student. I didn't have any brains. I didn't know what I was doing there. That's w The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
- Niels Bohr Clewer
Laundry increases exponentially in the number of children.
-- Miriam Robbins An undefined problem has an infinite number of solutions.
-- Robert A. Humphrey The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy Prejudice is the child of ignorance.
-- William Hazlitt "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead, 1901-78) Clewer I'm not dumb, I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
-- Calvin I hate women because they always know where things are.
-- James Thurber These people have served a longer sentence than some people who have committed murder.
-- Jeff Greenfield, news analyst, describing the jury in the OJ Simpson murder trial, 1995 Clewer
I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules, including:
* Both of your socks should always be the same color
* Or they should at least both be fairly dark
-- Dave Barry Most married couples, even though they love each other very much in theory, tend to view each
other in practice as large teeming flaw colonies, the result being that they get on each other's
nerves The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
- Samuel Johnson "Give me liberty or give me death." (Patrick Henry) "To be great is to be misunderstood." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Clewer If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be called research, would it?
-- Albert Einstein "There cannot be a God because, if there were one, I would not believe that I was not He." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Acting is the most minor of gifts and not a very high-class way to earn a living. After all, Shirley
Temple could do it at the age of four.
-- Katharine Hepburn Clewer
"For better or for worse, our company (The News Corporation Ltd.) is a reflection of my thinking, my character, my values." (Keith Rupert Murdoch, media mogul, 1931-) Love means to love that which is unlovable; or it is no virtue at all.
-- G. K. Chesterton The paradox is really the pathos of intellectual life and just as only great souls are exposed to
passions it is only the great thinker who is exposed to what I call paradoxes, which are . . .
grand To love another person is to help them love God.
-- Søren Kierkegaard She felt in italics and thought in capitals.
-- Henry James Clewer "The overman ... Who has organized the chaos of his passions, given style to his character, and become creative. Aware of life's terrors, he affirms life without resentment." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietz If all men were brothers, would you let one marry your sister? The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
- Emile Zola Clewer
All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others.
-- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty.
-- Christopher Morley It destroys one's nerves to be amiable everyday to the same human being.
-- Benjamin Disraeli Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.
-- Mark Twain "The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. 'Where shall I begin, please your Majesty?' he asked. 'Begin at the beginning,' the King said gravely, 'and go on till you come to the end: then stop.'" (Lewi Clewer A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their
graves obscure men whom timidity prevented from making a first effort.
-- Sydney Smith A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman
is one who can find such a man.
-- Lana Turner "Think off-center." (George Carlin) Clewer
Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.
-- Ernest Hemingway "We're all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don't make any big ones." (Andrew A. Rooney) When a girl marries she exchanges the attention of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland Until the day of his death, no man can be sure of his courage.
-- Jean Anouilh The gods gave man fire and he invented fire engines. They gave him love and he invented marriage. Clewer "I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying, dead." (Oscar Wilde) Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.
-- John Lyly I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. we are for the most part
more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers.
-- Thoreau Clewer
Genius has somewhat of the infantine; But of the childish not a touch or taint.
-- Robert Browning You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and
begin slitting throats.
- Henry Louis Mencken "I don't think it's the nature of any man to be monogamous. Men are propelled by genetically ordained impulses over which they have no control to distribute their seed." (Marlon Brando) A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author.
-- G. K. Chesterton Clewer Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.
-- James Stephens Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and
ethical infants.
-- General Omar Bradley Clewer
The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
-- Robert Benchley The Church is an organism that grows best in an alien society.
-- C. Stacey Woods In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.
- W.B. Prescott The greatest homage to truth is to use it.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson As always, victory finds a hundred fathers but defeat is an orphan.
-- Count Galeazzo Ciano, The Ciano Diaries Clewer My mother's menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it.
-- Buddy Hackett "Excellence is in the details. Give attention to the details and excellence will come." (Perry Paxton) Opportunities multiply as they are seized.
-- Sun Tzu Clewer
Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.
-- Paul Boese Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately
becomes consumed by distasteful sexual fantasies which involve doing uncomfortable things in
those tiny toil Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.
-- Oscar Wilde "I had discovered that a person does not have to be this or be that or be anything, not even oneself. One is free." (Walker Percy, The Moviegoer) Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.
-- Benjamin Franklin Clewer I didn't accept it. I received it.
-- Richard Allen, National Security Advisor to President Reagan, explaining the $1000 in cash and
two watches he was given by two Japanese journalists after he hel "Even death is unreliable. Instead of zero it may be some ghastly hallucination, such as the square root of minus one." (Samuel Beckett) "God is a gentleman. He prefers blondes." (Joe Orton, Loot) Clewer
"Ten people who speak make more noise than ten thousand who are silent." (Napoleon Bonaparte) Why don't you write books people can read?
-- Nora Joyce, to her husband James The best defense is a good offense.
-- Anonymous Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
-- Oscar Wilde Even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim
poses.
-- John Weitz, American Designer Clewer If God had meant us to vote, He would have given us candidates.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec Marriage is a rest period between romances. Clewer
