"One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar." (Helen Keller) Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
-- Josh Billings Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of
sin.
-- John Von Neuman Research is the act of going up alleys to see if they are blind.
-- Plutarch "Courage is found in unlikely places." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Guides and Directories The empires of the future are the empires of the mind.
-- Winston Churchill Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add
up.
-- Anon If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf Guides and Directories
"Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What?! You too! Thought I was the only one.'" (Clive Staples Lewis) Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for
him.
-- Rich Little "How can we know the dancer from the dance?" (William Butler Yeats) I didn't have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.
-- Mark Twain The philosophy exam was a piece of cake -- which was a bit of a surprise, actually, because I
was expecting some questions on a sheet of paper.
-- Smith & Jones Guides and Directories To love another person is to help them love God.
-- Søren Kierkegaard Good judgement comes from experience, and experience--well, that comes from poor judgement.
-- Cousin Woodman blah bl "Less is more." (Robert Browning) Guides and Directories
"I don't believe people die. They just go uptown. To Bloomingdales. They just take longer to get back." (Andy Warhol) The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because
generally they are the same people.
-- G. K. Chesterton Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing.
-- Salvador Dali The voice of the intellect is a soft one, but it does not rest till it has gained a hearing.
-- Sigmund Freud Beauty as we feel it is something indescribable; what it is or what it means can never be said.
-- George Santayana Guides and Directories "The want of logic annoys. Too much logic bores. Life eludes logic, and everything that logic alone constructs remains artificial and forced." (André Gide) Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.
-- Edward H. Land Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp Guides and Directories
Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You'd see a flock of birds come by, laughing hysterically!
-- Steven Wright An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets the more interested
he is in her.
-- Agatha Christie Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and
hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in
Heaven.
-- P. J "Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since at least half the sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
-- Sacha Guitry Guides and Directories Live truth instead of professing it.
-- Elbert Hubbard Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and around the hands and feet of the man. "Eschew the ordinary, disdain the commonplace. If you have a single-minded need for something, let it be the unusual, the esoteric, the bizarre, the unexpected..." (Chuck Jones) Guides and Directories
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read.
-- Groucho Marx The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have
to shave twice a day.
-- Adlai Stevenson Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.
-- Chinese Proverb "Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but
as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!"
-- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge.
-- Edward Chilton Guides and Directories The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. -- Groucho Marx The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. -- S. T. Coleridge Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount.
-- Clare Boothe Luce Guides and Directories
We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is a false opinion; and if we
were sure, stifling it would be an evil still.
-- John Stuart Mill "One of the things about acting is it allows you to live other people's lives without having to pay the price. I've never been one of those actors who has touted myself as a fascinating human being. I Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
- Voltaire (1694-1778) on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan. Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie. Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive.
-- Anaïs Nin Guides and Directories Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage,
he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it.
-- Helen Roland Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.
-- Virginia Woolf I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.
- Thomas Watson, Chairman of IBM, 1943 Guides and Directories
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
-- Tom Clancy If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it with a computer.
-- Anon. And in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make.
-- The Beatles, The last lyric of their last song The only thing that holds a marriage together is the husband bein' big enough to keep his mouth
shut, to step back and see where his wife is wrong.
-- Archie Bunker, character on "All in the Family, Don't bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than
yourself.
-- William Faulkner Guides and Directories Before marraige a man will like awake all night thinking about something you said. After marriage
he will fall asleep before you have finished saying it.
-- Anon. We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.
-- Aesop I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in
charge, I believe everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about.
-- Hen Guides and Directories
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor Beauty as we feel it is something indescribable; what it is or what it means can never be said.
-- George Santayana Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures.
-- Samuel Johnson "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free." (Emma Lazarus) The only weapon that becomes sharper with constant use is the tongue.
-- Anonymous Guides and Directories Nature gave men two ends - one to sit on and one to think with. Ever since then man's success or
failure has been dependent on the one he used most.
-- George R. Kirkpatrick "Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas." (Anonymous) "Dream as if you'll live forever; live as if you'll die tomorrow." (James Dean) Guides and Directories
And in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make.
-- The Beatles, The last lyric of their last song "I am convinced that it is not the fear of death, of our lives ending that haunts our sleep so much as the fear ... that as far as the world is concerned, we might as well never have lived." (Rabbi H "The meeting of two personalites is like the contact of two chemical substances. If there is any reaction, both are transformed." (Carl Gustav Jung) Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop
questioning.
-- Albert Einstein Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
- Isaac Asimov Guides and Directories "Better is the enemy of good." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth. -- John Lyly "We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly." (Bill Mahe Guides and Directories
"The reason why kids are crazy is because nobody can face the responsibility of bringing them up." (John Lennon) When people go to work, they shouldn't have to leave their hearts at home.
-- Betty Bender To marry is to halve your rights and double your duties.
-- Arthur Schopenhauer It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if
I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now
comple Guides and Directories A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What
do you mean?" responded her mother. "Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came
back with ano "People have to talk about something just to keep their voice boxes in working order so they'll have good voice boxes in case there's ever anything really meaningful to say." (Kurt Vonnegut) You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true.
-- Richard Bach Guides and Directories
It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
- Albert Einstein "In large states public education will always be mediocre, for the same reason that in large kitchens the cooking is usually bad." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) A human being is a part of the whole, called by us Universe, a part limited in time and space. He
experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest--a kind of
optic May you live happily ever after with a poor, ugly, shrewish wife. "I was lousy in school. Real screwed-up. A moron. I was antisocial and didn't bother with the other kids. A really bad student. I didn't have any brains. I didn't know what I was doing there. That's w Guides and Directories These people have served a longer sentence than some people who have committed murder.
-- Jeff Greenfield, news analyst, describing the jury in the OJ Simpson murder trial, 1995 In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.
- W.B. Prescott "That government is best which governs the least, because its people discipline themselves." (Thomas Jefferson) Guides and Directories
