I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked
me in the cellar.
-- Anonymous When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.
- Sir Winston Churchill It was very good of God to let Carlyle and Mrs Carlyle marry one another and so make only two people miserable instead of four, besides being very amusing. I require three things in a man: He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.
-- Dorothy Parker When you're away, I'm restless, lonely
Wretched, bored, dejected; only
here's the rub, my darling dear,
I feel the same when you are here.
-- Samuel Hoffenstein Printing It is better to be looked over than overlooked.
-- Mae West It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous You will marry into an Indian tribe and become one big Hopi family. Printing
"Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free." (Emma Lazarus) More than kisses, letters mingle souls.
-- John Donne "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain -- and most fools do." (Dale Carnegie) Who, being loved, is poor?
-- Oscar Wilde I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree.
Indeed, unless the billboards fall,
I'll never see a tree at all.
-- Ogden Nash, Song of the Open Road, 1945 Printing I don't feel good.
-- Luther Burbank, dying words Art and science have their meeting point in method.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton "Humans beings can always be relied upon to assert, with vigor, their god-given right to be stupid." (Dean Koontz, Seize the Night) Printing
For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.
-- Anne Morrow Lindbergh Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.
-- Blaise Pascal, Pensées, trans. A.J. Krailsheimer If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.
- George Bernard Shaw Printing One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is
terribly important.
-- Bertrand Russell We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. -- Groucho Marx [You reporters] should have printed what he meant, not what he said.
-- Earl Bush, press aide to Richard Daley Printing
Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.
-- Edward H. Land Love means to love that which is unlovable; or it is no virtue at all.
-- G. K. Chesterton "...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes) If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. Printing "In large states public education will always be mediocre, for the same reason that in large kitchens the cooking is usually bad." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) A team effort is a lot of people doing what I say.
-- Michael Winner Printing
In literature as in love, we are astonished at what is chosen by others.
-- André Maurois "To be great is to be misunderstood." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Life is the flower for which love is the honey.
-- Victor Hugo "Ten people who speak make more noise than ten thousand who are silent." (Napoleon Bonaparte) Victory belongs to the most persevering.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte Printing Choose the life that is most useful, and habit will make it the most agreeable.
-- Francis Bacon Journalism consists largely in saying "Lord Jones died" to people who never knew Lord Jones
was alive.
-- G. K. Chesterton The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal consistency of the women who
love me.
-- George Bernard Shaw Printing
A sweetheart is a bottle of wine, a wife is a wine bottle.
-- Baudelaire When you see what some girls marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.
-- Helen Rowland Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
-- Lily Tomlin No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. -- Honore de Balzac Grad school is the snooze button on the clock-radio of life.
-- John Rogers, comedian (who holds a graduate degree in physics) Printing Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
-- Thomas Jones "The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties." (Oscar Wilde) Great eaters and great sleepers are incapable of anything else that is great.
-- William Shakespeare, Henry IV Printing
I don't mind if you don't like my manners. I don't like them myself. They're pretty bad. I grieve over
them on long winter evenings.
-- Humphrey Bogart to Lauren Bacall, in "The Big Sleep" Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.
-- Chinese Proverb Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility.
-- Dietrich Bonhoeffer You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.
-- Beverly Sills "Fear is a darkroom where negatives develop." (Usman Asif) Printing Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
-- Helen Keller "I think people resist freedom because they're afraid of the unknown. But it's ironic....That unknown was once very well known. It's where are souls belong....The only solution is to confront them--co "I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio." (Joan Rivers) Printing
The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies Don't trust anyone over 30 who used to say "Don't trust anyone over 30."
-- Anonymous "Those who feel certainty are stupid and those with any imagination or understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Better to die ten thousand deaths than wound my honor.
-- Joseph Addison Do or do not. There is no try.
-- Yoda, character in the movie The Empire Strikes Back Printing The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other
is ready.
-- Henry David Thoreau My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
philosopher.
- Socrates If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?
-- Calvin Trillin Printing
Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
- Henry Kissinger Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. Work expands to fill the time available.
-- PARKINSON'S LAW I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President Printing "In large states public education will always be mediocre, for the same reason that in large kitchens the cooking is usually bad." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
-- Mother Teresa The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and
ethical infants.
-- General Omar Bradley Printing
A White House well filled, a little peanut field well tilled, and a wife who will go to the Bronx are
great riches.
-- Poor Jimmy's Almanac "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) "If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat." (Mark Twain) "There is no such thing as a person that nothing has happened to, and each person's story is as different as his fingertips." (Elsa Lanchester) If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble.
-- Elbert Hubbard Printing Do or do not. There is no try.
-- Yoda, character in the movie The Empire Strikes Back This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but hurled with great force.
-- Dorothy Parker If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.
-- Albert Einstein Printing
He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
-- Anonymous If I were to try to read, much less answer, all the attacks made on me, this shop might as well be
closed for any other business.
-- Abraham Lincoln "I feel I have to protect myself against things. So I'm pretty careful to lose most of them." (George Orson Welles) Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they're yours.
- Richard Bach A human being is a part of the whole, called by us Universe, a part limited in time and space. He
experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest--a kind of
optic Printing Generations to come will find it difficult to believe that a man such as Gandhi ever walked the
face of this earth.
-- Albert Einstein "I like boring things." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.
- Edward George Bulwer-Lytton Printing
