"So little done, so much to do." (Cecil Rhodes) Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
-- Anonymous "Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something." (Plato, 427 BC-348) All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
- Ambrose Bierce For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt Guyhirn "One can do without people but one has need of a friend." (Chinese Proverb) "Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget." (G. Randolf) All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
-- Charlie Chaplin Guyhirn
"You make 'em, I amuse 'em." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, on children) "I have no special gift; I am only passionately curious." (Albert Einstein) I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
-- Will Rogers "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.
-- Proverbs 23:7 Guyhirn "I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio." (Joan Rivers) Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish.
-- Albert Einstein If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
-- Johnny Carson Guyhirn
"I've never let my school interfere with my education." (Mark Twain) "Deep down, no one really believes they have a right to live. But this death sentence generally stays tucked away, hidden beneath the difficulty of living. If that difficulty is removed from time to t Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.
- Friedrich Nietzsche "Workers of the world unite; you have nothing to lose but your chains." (Karl Marx) Tear open packet, unfold and use.
-- Directions on moist towelette package Guyhirn Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. Laundry increases exponentially in the number of children.
-- Miriam Robbins "When a hundred men stand together, each of them loses his mind and gets another one." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Guyhirn
"Friends are those people who know the words to the song in your heart and sing them back to you when you have forgotten the words." (Anonymous) One survey found that ten percent of Americans thought Joan of Arc was Noah's wife....
-- Robert Boynton "Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily." (Napoleon Bonaparte) Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.
-- Oscar Wilde cannot imagine any condition which would cause this ship to founder. Modern shipbuilding has
gone beyond that.
-- E. I. Smith, Captain of the Titanic Guyhirn Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie. Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson "We the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) Guyhirn
A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
-- Sidney Goff It is with true love as it is with ghosts; everyone talks about it, but few have seen it.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld CAPITAL, n. The seat of misgovernment. That which provides the fire, the pot, the dinner, the
table and the knife and fork for the anarchist; the part of the repast that himself supplies is the
disg Opera in English is, in the main, about as sensible as baseball in Italian.
-- H. L. Mencken We have a habit in writing articles published in scientific journals to make the work as finished as
possible, to cover up all the tracks, to not worry about the blind alleys or describe how you had Guyhirn Epperson's law:
When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can beat him at. When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the
problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
- Buckminster It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
-- Gore Vidal Guyhirn
I dislike arguments of any kind. They are always vulgar, and often convincing.
-- Oscar Wilde Defeat is not the worst of failures. Not to have tried is the true failure.
-- George E. Woodberry Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to
us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
-- Jeff Raskin "The evil that men do lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones." (William Shakespeare, Julius Cĉsar. Act iii. Sc. 2.) Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance.
-- Oscar Wilde Guyhirn I think every woman is entitled to a middle husband she can forget.
-- Adela Rogers St. John Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
- Voltaire (1694-1778) on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan. "Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings." (Samuel Johnson) Guyhirn
And life is what we make it. Always has been, always will be.
-- Grandma Moses It takes a great deal of history to produce a little literature.
-- Henry James "Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh." (George Bernard Shaw) Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day.
-- Thornton Wilder You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
-- Al Capone Guyhirn I shall return.
-- General Douglas MacArthur Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind. I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again.
-- Bart Simpson, young character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show Guyhirn
It is important that students bring a certain ragamuffin, barefoot, irreverence to their studies; they
are not here to worship what is known, but to question it.
-- J. Bronowski, The Ascent of Man Behind every great fortune there is a crime.
- Honore de Balzac Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
-- T.S. Eliot I do not see the EEC as a great love affair. It is more like nine desperate middle-ages couples with failing marriages meeting at a Brussels hotel for a group grope. -- Tynan Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
- Irving Kristol Guyhirn Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
- Ambrose Bierce There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never
were, and ask why not?
-- Robert Francis Kennedy "Every Man and every Woman is a Star." (Aleister Crowley) Guyhirn
Nothing says lovin' like marrying your cousin!
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility.
-- Dietrich Bonhoeffer Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only
hope to find in their butlers.
-- W. Somerset Maugham Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
-- H. L. Mencken "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." (Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.) Guyhirn Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
-- Mark Twain "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear." (Ambrose Redmoon) "What a curious phenomenon it is that you can get men to die for the liberty of the world who will not make the little sacrifice that is needed to free themselves from their own individual bondage." Guyhirn
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-- George Bernard Shaw then the world 's mine oyster
-- William Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.
- Steven Wright Experience teaches only the teachable.
-- Aldous Huxley "I've never let my school interfere with my education." (Mark Twain) Guyhirn And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly,
what is essential is invisible to the eye.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupery Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to.
-- Shane Leslie Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes Guyhirn
Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.
-- Alphonse Allais All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
-- Anonymous Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together....
-- Carl Zwanzig "A man who tells lies, like me, merely hides the truth. But a man who tells half-lies has forgotten where he put it." (Claude Rains, as Mr. Dryden, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) Guyhirn "It ends not with a bang, but a whimper." (Thomas Stearns Eliot, aka T. S. Eliot, The Hollow Man) "From the start, marriage was instituted for contemptible, practical reasons--an idea of men." (Catherine Deneuve) They will say you are on the wrong road, if it is your own.
-- Antonio Porchi Guyhirn
