Alsager Bridgestone Amateur Swimming Club - Has introduction and joining instructions, club news, calendar, results, fixtures list and training schedule. [Requires JavaScript]
Alsager Tour Guide - Web portal featuring collection of guided walks, list of local events and guestbook.
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
-- Mark Twain Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's
family does too.
-- Anonymous We have a habit in writing articles published in scientific journals to make the work as finished as
possible, to cover up all the tracks, to not worry about the blind alleys or describe how you had Early to rise and early to bed.
Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
-- James Thurber Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would
be doing if he were alive today?
1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.
2) Advising the President.
3) D Alsager Watching the debate this afternoon it was apparent they loved term limits in the House -- as
Brutus loved Caesar.
-- Bill Moyers We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.
-- G. K. Chesterton Marriage is like a cage--one sees the birds outside desperate to get in and those inside equally
desparate to get out.
-- Di Peatlins Alsager
Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose.
-- F. M. Knowles Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.
-- Dr. Benjamin Spock, American pediatrician, address to new parents There are only two things a child will share willingly communicable diseases and his mother's
age.
-- Modern Maturity Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.
-- Polish proverb There are trivial truths, and there are great truths. The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.
The opposite of a great truth is also true.
-- Neils Bohr Alsager Jealousy is the only vice that gives no pleasure.
-- Anonymous The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
-- Clarence Darrow If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
-- Harry Shearer Alsager
Obstacles cannot crush me. Every obstacle yields to stern resolve. He who is fixed to a star does
not change his mind.
-- Leonardo da Vinci, Notebooks "Everybody knows that if you are too careful, you become so occupied in being careful that you are sure to stumble over something." (Gertrude Stein) Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only
hope to find in their butlers.
-- W. Somerset Maugham Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
-- H. L. Mencken "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously u Alsager "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." (Oscar Wilde) I shall return.
-- General Douglas MacArthur Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.
-- Anonymous Alsager
Jealousy is the only vice that gives no pleasure.
-- Anonymous "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
-- John Ciardi Does anal retentive have a hyphen?
-- Seen on a t-shirt Show my head to the people, it is worth seeing.
-- Georges Danton, to his executioner Alsager Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule.
-- Samuel Butler If God created us in His image we have certainly returned the compliment.
-- Voltaire If God had meant us to vote, He would have given us candidates.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Alsager
I still believe in liberalism today as much as I ever did, but, oh, there was a happy time when I
believed in liberals...
-- G. K. Chesterton It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
- Oscar Wilde Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure A hippo does not have a sting in its tail, but a wise man would still rather be sat on by a bee.
-- Polish proverb The only thing you take with you when you're gone is what you leave behind.
-- John Allston Alsager If it weren't for marriage, men would spend their lives thinking they had no faults at all.
-- Anonymous Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
- Karl Wallenda My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who work and those who
take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there.
-- INDIRA Alsager
"Everyone is a bore to someone. That is unimportant. The thing to avoid is being a bore to oneself." (Gerald Brenan) The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
-- Joseph Heller, God Knows For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault "...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes) If God does not exist, then everything is permitted.
-- Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Devils Alsager May the road rise to meet you. May the wind always be at your back. May the sun shine warm
upon your face, the rains fall soft upon your fields and, until we meet again, may God hold you in
the palm "It is awfully easy to be hard-boiled about everything in the daytime, but at night it is another thing." (Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises) "If I were still a critic, I would loathe knowing the person I was writing about. There's enough of an incestuous relationship between subject and writer." (Manny Farber, American film theorist) Alsager
God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at
the same time.
- Robin Williams, commenting on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair You can observe a lot by watching.
-- Yogi Berra Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.
-- Hector Louis Berlioz Now comes the mystery.
-- Henry Ward Beecher, dying words, March 8, 1887 We never reflect how pleasant it is to ask for nothing.
-- Seneca Alsager "The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none." (Thomas Carlyle, 1795-1881) "Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don't allow our enemies to have guns, why should we allow them to have ideas?" (Josef Stalin) If you cannot be the master of your language, you must be its slave. If you cannot examine your
thoughts, you have no choice but to think them, however silly they may be.
-- Richard Mitchell, from Alsager
Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc
jockey is not allowed to talk.
-- Fran Lebowitz The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely the one who dropped it.
-- Lou Holtz You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.
-- Dolly Parton Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.
-- Marion Barry, Mayor, Washington, D.C. Joint Checking Account: a handly little device which permits my wife to beat me to the draw. Alsager "A true friend stabs you in the front." (Oscar Wilde) Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.
-- John Heywood "The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." (David Russell) Alsager
Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.
-- Ernie Kovacs Do you not know, my son, with what little understanding the world is ruled?
-- Pope Julius III I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
-- Henny Youngman Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose.
-- F. M. Knowles "We have so little presumption that we should like to be known in the world, even to those who come after when we are no more. We have so little vanity that the esteem of five people, say six, amuses Alsager She felt in italics and thought in capitals.
-- Henry James This is the miracle that happens every time to those who really love; the more they give, the more
they possess.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for
half the money.
-- Arthur Godfrey Alsager
Look at life through the windshield, not the rear-view mirror.
-- Byrd Baggett Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.
-- Harriet Beecher Stowe "A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men." (Roald Dahl) Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Mature love says: "I need you because I
love you."
-- Erich Fromm "We must view young people not as empty bottles to be filled but as candles to be lit." (Robert Shaffer) Alsager If Satan ever loses his hair, there'll be hell toupee.
-- Anonymous Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking
campaign Marriage is the sole cause of divorce. Alsager
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way
around the laws.
- Plato "I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you and education." (Wilson Mizner) "Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery." (Andy Warhol) The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-- Albert Einstein I married beneath me. All women do.
-- Lady Nancy Astor, attributed Alsager I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
-- W. C. Fields Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-- George Bernard Shaw And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
-- Abraham Lincoln Alsager
