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A man can do what he wants, but not want what he wants.
-- Arthur Schoperhauer "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) "Like as the waves make towards the pebbl'd shore, so do our minutes, hasten to their end." (William Shakespeare) It is always right that a man should be able to render a reason for the faith that is within him.
-- Sydney Smith "In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes." (Andy Warhol) Stretton Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.
-- Samuel Butler "Ask five economists and you'll get five different answers (six if one went to Harvard)." (Edgar R. Fiedler) "People expect a certain reaction from a business, and when you pleasantly exceed those expectations, you've somehow passed an important psychological threshold." (Richard Thalheimer, president, The Stretton
A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.
-- Edgar Watson Howe Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own
language and forthwith it is something entirely different.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
-- Aldous Huxley Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
-- Colin Greene I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
- e e cummings Stretton "It seems to me that there are two kinds of trickery: the 'fronts' people assume before one another's eyes, and the 'front' a writer puts on the face of reality." (Francois Sagan) "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais Stretton
He that would have the fruit must climb the tree.
-- Thomas Fuller, M.D. The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it.
-- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan Anything is possible, but only a few things actually happen.
-- Richard Rosen "The most beautiful things in the world are the most useless, peacocks and lilies, for instance." (John Ruskin) All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
-- Charlie Chaplin Stretton Marry not a tennis player. For love means nothing to them. We are all here for a spell; get all the good laughs you can.
-- Will Rogers "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) Stretton
MARRIAGE, n. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two
slaves, making in all, two.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Computers will not be perfected until they can compute how much more than the estimate the job
will cost.
-- Anon "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) Universities incline wits to sophistry and affectation.
-- Francis Bacon Stretton Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only
hope to find in their butlers.
-- W. Somerset Maugham The mathematician lives long and lives young; the wings of his soul do not early drop off, nor do
its pores become clogged with the earthy particles blown from the dusty highways of vulgar life.
-- "Eschew the ordinary, disdain the commonplace. If you have a single-minded need for something, let it be the unusual, the esoteric, the bizarre, the unexpected..." (Chuck Jones) Stretton
A narcissist is someone better-looking than you are.
-- Gore Vidal A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
-- Gloria Steinem "It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else." (John W Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
- Will Durant And life is what we make it. Always has been, always will be.
-- Grandma Moses Stretton Vote early and vote often.
- Al Capone Its failings notwithstanding, there is much to be said in favor of journalism in that by giving us the
opinion of the uneducated, it keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community.
-- Oscar W "Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) Stretton
"Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.
-- Abraham Lincoln A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
-- Marvin Kitman I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
- Ian L. Fleming If all these sweet young things were laid end to end, I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised.
-- Dorothy Parker Stretton No woman marries for money; they are all clever enough, before marrying a millionaire, to fall in
love with him first.
-- Cesare Pavese The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted
in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism.
-- Heidi Hartmann, The Unha Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.
-- Oscar Wilde Stretton
"It is a curious thing that God learned Greek when he wished to turn author--and that he did not learn it better." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "What dies if freedom lives? What lives if freedom dies?" (Lindsay Anderson, British filmmaker, from if.... (1968) What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?
-- Robert Schuller Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
-- Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle "I praise loudly. I blame softly." (Catherine the Great) Stretton The best way to get husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they are too old to do it.
-- Shirley MacLaine Don't be so humble - you are not that great.
- Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat "Wise men learn more from fools, than fools from the wise." (Anonymous) Stretton
His ignorance is encyclopedic
- Abba Eban A Sunday school is a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.
-- H. L. Mencken Laugh and the world laughs with you. Snore and you sleep alone.
-- Anthony Burgess Repentance is not so much remorse for what we have done as the fear of the consequences.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld, Maxims, 1665 Problems worthy of attack prove their worth by fighting back.
- Paul Erdos Stretton Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous.
-- Thornton Wilder Just buy a box of popcorn and a Coca-Cola and sit back and watch.
-- James Carville, Clinton advisor, offering advice for Democrats on the term-limits vote in the
House "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man." (George Bernard Shaw) Stretton
"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend." (William Blake) "In married life three is company and two is none." (Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest) God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
-- Voltaire All courage is a form of constancy. It is always himself that a coward abandons first. After this all
other betrayals come.
-- Cormac McCarthy Golf is a good walk spoiled.
-- Mark Twain Stretton "We have to be able to criticise what we love, to say what we have to say 'cause if your not trying to make something better, than as far as I can tell, you are just in the way." (Ani Difranco) We think caged birds sing, when indeed they cry.
-- John Webster In the end, everything is a gag.
- Charlie Chaplin Stretton
And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly,
what is essential is invisible to the eye.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupery Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
-- Mother Teresa Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances
continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the
distance "Don't let your ego get too close to your position, so that if your position gets shot down, your ego doesn't go with it." (Colin Powell) Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones.
-- Phillip Brooks Stretton He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
- Abraham Lincoln What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?
-- Robert Schuller A leader in the Democratic Party is a boss, in the Republican Party he is a leader.
Harry S. Truman Stretton
If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
-- Voltaire Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
-- Anonymous A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
-- Mark Twain "A critic is a man who knows the way but can't drive the car." (Kenneth Tynan) Stretton Whoever controls the media--the images--controls the culture.
-- Allen Ginsberg We got to roll with the punches, play all of our hunches, make the best of whatever comes your
way. Forget that blind ambition, learn to trust your intuition -- plowing straight ahead, come what
may America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a
chair.
-- Arnold Toynbee Stretton
