The Church of St Joseph - Catholic church in Norton. Providing information on Mass times, contact details, location, parish history, bulletin and the various activities.
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of
mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
-- Rita Mae Brown I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love.
-- Mother Teresa Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
- Henry Louis Mencken Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands... but English women only
hope to find in their butlers.
-- W. Somerset Maugham "I am a part of all that I have met." (Alfred Lord Tennyson, 1809-1892, English poet) Society and Culture "When I was four years old they tried to test my IQ, they showed me this picture of three oranges and a pear. They asked me which one is different and does not belong, they taught me different was wro "In married life three is company and two is none." (Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest) Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else.
-- George Bernard Shaw Society and Culture
If I were to try to read, much less answer, all the attacks made on me, this shop might as well be
closed for any other business.
-- Abraham Lincoln Democracy encourages the majority to decide things about which the majority is blissfully
ignorant.
--John Simon During the first period of a man's life the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
-- Soren Kierkegaard Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three categories-- those that don't work, those
that break down, and those that get lost.
-- Russell Baker "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Society and Culture Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is.
-- Diane Ackerman Oregon Democratic Senate candidate Tom Bruggere, in describing his support for
comprehensive health care during a candidates' forum, said he supported "erection-to-
resurrection" coverage. He later a Usenet is like Tetris for people who still remember how to read.
-- Button from the Computer Museum, Boston, MA Society and Culture
Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Mature love says: "I need you because I
love you."
-- Erich Fromm A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes.
-- Joseph Addison Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
-- Oscar Wilde Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
-- Helen Keller And now, in keeping with Channel 40's policy of always bringing you the latest in blood and guts,
in living color, you're about to see another first -- an attempted suicide.
-- Chris Hubbock, who sh Society and Culture [You reporters] should have printed what he meant, not what he said.
-- Earl Bush, press aide to Richard Daley I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules, including:
* Both of your socks should always be the same color
* Or they should at least both be fairly dark
-- Dave Barry Never judge someone by who he's in love with; judge him by his friends. People fall in love with
the most appalling people. Take a cool, appraising glance at his pals.
-- Cynthia Heimel Society and Culture
"You know that being an American is more than a matter of where your parents came from. It is a belief that all men are created free and equal and that everyone deserves an even break." (Harry S. Tru I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University "People demand freedom only when they have no power." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
-- Red Buttons We do not remember days; we remember moments.
-- Anonymous Society and Culture "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) If God does not exist, then everything is permitted.
-- Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Devils When I can no longer bear to think of the victims of broken homes, I begin to think of the victims
of intact ones.
-- Peter DeVries Society and Culture
"We're all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don't make any big ones." (Andrew A. Rooney) Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.
- George Bernard Shaw Society and Culture Beneath the rule of men entirely great, / The pen is mightier than the sword.
-- Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton, Richelieu, II. ii Nothing has really happened until it has been recorded.
-- Virginia Woolf Man and wife make one fool. Society and Culture
Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before marriage, which is never advisable. -- Oscar Wilde The society of women is the element of good manners.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Soul meets soul on lovers lips.
-- Percy Bysshe Shelley "What a curious phenomenon it is that you can get men to die for the liberty of the world who will not make the little sacrifice that is needed to free themselves from their own individual bondage." "A man who tells lies, like me, merely hides the truth. But a man who tells half-lies has forgotten where he put it." (Claude Rains, as Mr. Dryden, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) Society and Culture If you don't double-click me, I can't do anything.
-- John Aniston, on how computers have taken over his life When one find's oneself in a hole of one's own making, it is a good time to examine the quality of
the workmanship.
-- John Renmerde Never moon a werewolf.
-- Mike Binder Society and Culture
"I think it's about time we voted for senators with breasts. After all, we've been voting for boobs
long enough."
-- Arizona senatorial candidate Claire Sargent, on women candidates Never eat more than you can lift.
-- Miss Piggy, character on "The Muppet Show," U.S. television show It may be that the race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong -- but that is the way
to bet.
-- Damon Runyan Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so you apologize for truth.
-- Benjamin Disraeli A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
-- Paul Valery Society and Culture "My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go." (Oscar Wilde, his last recorded words) Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter.
-- Cecilia Egan The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart.
-- Robert G. Ingersoll Society and Culture
"Everyone is a bore to someone. That is unimportant. The thing to avoid is being a bore to oneself." (Gerald Brenan) My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them. Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is.
-- Diane Ackerman I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
-- Fran Lebowitz Everywhere I go, I'm asked if the universities stifle writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle
enough of them.
-- Flannery O'Connor Society and Culture In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.
-- Robert Frost Of the seven dwarves, only Dopey had a shaven face. This should tell us something about the
custom of shaving.
-- Tom Robbins, Skinny Legs and All "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." (Thomas Jefferson, to Archibald Stuart, 1791) Society and Culture
A woman's always younger than a man of equal years.
-Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Aurora Leigh "Fear is the dark room where the Devil develops his negatives." (Gary Busey) He who hesitates is a damned fool.
- Mae West Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
-- Pancho Villa, dying words Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with
the powerful, not to be neutral.
-- Paulo Freire Society and Culture As always, victory finds a hundred fathers but defeat is an orphan.
-- Count Galeazzo Ciano, The Ciano Diaries "When we are born we cry that we are come to this great stage of fools." (William Shakespeare) When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his
cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that
Uncl Society and Culture
"Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them." (Oscar Wilde, A Woman of No Importance) Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue.
-- Hermione Gingold Oregon Democratic Senate candidate Tom Bruggere, in describing his support for
comprehensive health care during a candidates' forum, said he supported "erection-to-
resurrection" coverage. He later a Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run.
- Rudyard Kipling None but a good man is really a living man, and the more good any man does, the more he really
lives. All the rest is death, or belongs to it.
-- Herman Melville Society and Culture Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately
becomes consumed by distasteful sexual fantasies which involve doing uncomfortable things in
those tiny toil When you've spent half your political life dealing with humdrum issues like the environment... it's
exciting to have a real crisis on your hands.
-- Margaret Thatcher, on the Falklands Conflict The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
-- ee cummings Society and Culture
Love is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
-- Lisa Hoffman Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
-- John F. Kennedy "People demand freedom only when they have no power." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." (Albert Einstein) A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
-- Marvin Kitman Society and Culture A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude.
-- Oscar Wilde He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
- H. H. Munro (Saki) "Do you know that places only yield up their secrets, their most profound mysteries, to those who are just passing through?" (Salman Rushdie, The Moor's Last Sigh) Society and Culture
