"Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but
as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic!"
-- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or
play.
-- WARREN BEATTY Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.
-- Jane Austen A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos Education We do not have censorship. What we have is a limitation on what newspapers can report.
-- Louis Nel, Deputy Minister of Information, South Africa "It ends not with a bang, but a whimper." (Thomas Stearns Eliot, aka T. S. Eliot, The Hollow Man) "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." (Herbert Spencer) Education
"I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." (Galileo Galilei) I sometimes think that God, in creating man, overestimated His ability.
-- Oscar Wilde When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him.
-- Thomas Szasz, The Second Sin, 1973 The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind
woman.
-- S. T. Coleridge "Courageous, untroubled, mocking and violent--that is what Wisdom wants us to be. Wisdom is a woman, and loves only a warrior." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Education Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress.
-- Anonymous Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is
not a conservative, has no brains.
-- Winston Churchill "When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost." (Billy Graham) Education
The whole problem can be stated quite simply by asking, "Is there a meaning to music?" My
answer would be, "Yes." And "Can you state in so many words what the meaning is?" My answer
to that would be It takes a great deal of history to produce a little literature.
-- Henry James It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
-- Anonymous The best way to get husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they are too old to do it.
-- Shirley MacLaine Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.
-- James Stephens Education A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
-- Christopher Morley An ideal wife is one who remains faithful to you but tries to be just as charming as if she weren't.
-- Sacha Guitry "Shared joys make a friend, not shared sufferings." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Education
Seek the lofty by reading, hearing and seeing great work at some moment every day.
-- Thornton Wilder The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.
-- Jilly Cooper Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
-- Albert Einstein If your wife wants to learn how to drive, don't stand in her way. For I am a bear of very little brain and long words bother me.
-- Winnie the Pooh, character from author A. A. Milne Education "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it with a computer.
-- Anon. Education
"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget." (G. Randolf) "Does wisdom perhaps appear on the earth as a raven which is inspired by the smell of carrion?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "All our best men are laughed at in this nightmare land." (Jack Keroac) In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th In marriage, the bridge gets a shower. But for the groom, it's curtains! Education Nothing that was worthy in the past departs; no truth or goodness realized by man ever dies, or
can die.
-- Thomas Carlyle Infatuation is when you think that he's as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger,
as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is
when you r The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to
contact us.
-- Bill Watterson, in his comic strip Calvin and Hobbes Education
Nuns: Women who marry God. If they divorce Him, do they get half the universe? Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
-- Marx Groucho, the film "Animal Crackers" "Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh." (George Bernard Shaw) Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like
what you are getting.
-- Anonymous Chance is always powerful. - Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it,
there will be a fish.
-- Ovid Education This search for what you want is like tracking something that doesn't want to be tracked. It takes
time to get a dance right, to create something memorable.
-- Fred Astaire "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) "A girl can wait for the right man to come along, but in the meantime that still doesn't mean she can't have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones." (Cher) Education
Lawyers are... operators of the toll bridge which anyone in search of justice must pass.
-- Jane Bryant Quinn We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. -- H.L. Mencken Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a
brand new ending.
-- Anonymous You cannot think about thinking, without thinking about thinking about something.
-- Seymour Papert "Well begun is half done." (Aristotle) Education "Growth in wisdom can be measured precisely by decline in bile." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human) A man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world.
-- George Santayana "He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself." (Thomas Paine) Education
Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
- Jimmy Durante "The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right." (Mark Twain) Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
-- John F. Kennedy No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. -- Honore de Balzac "Some look at things that are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not?" (George Bernard Shaw) Education "The only way to have friends is to be one." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) "True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it is lost." (Charles Caleb Colton) If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile.
-- Lynda Barry Education
We must become the change we want to see.
-- Gandhi "I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you and education." (Wilson Mizner) UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Sure, it's going to kill a lot of people, but they may be dying of something else anyway.
-- Othal Brand, member of a Texas pesticide review board "God's creatures, great and small ... eat them one, eat them all." (John A. Simone Sr.) Education In a cat's eyes, all things belong to cats.
-- English Proverb "I run to see who has the most guts." (Steve Roland Prefontaine) When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with
the buttered side down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat; the 2 will hover,
Education
Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust.
-- Grover Cleveland Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.
-- Samuel Butler Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. May you never leave your marriage alive. My grandfather once told me that there are two kinds of people: those who work and those who
take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was less competition there.
-- INDIRA Education When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall
looking frantic.
-- Steven Wright In the end, everything is a gag.
- Charlie Chaplin Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. Education
I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to
know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.
- Clarence Darrow, Facts are the enemy of truth.
- Don Quixote - Man of La Mancha Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for
appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George bernard Shaw I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't.
-- Jules Renard Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
-- Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle Education "Men act and women appear. Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at." (John Berger) If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
- Seymour Cray (1925-1996), father of supercomputing "The dancer's body is simply the luminous manifestation of the soul." (Isadora Duncan) Education
