It is amazing at how small a price may the wedding ring be placed upon a worthless hand; but, by
the beauty of our law, what heaps of gold are indispensable to take it off!
-- Douglas Jerold, 1858 If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie Free will is a golden thread running through the frozen matrix of fixed events.
-- Robert A. Heinlein _The Rolling Stones_ Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does.
-- Groucho Marx If all men were brothers, would you let one marry your sister? Arts and Entertainment I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
-- Mae West Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you
have to do, when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not.
-- Aldous Huxley My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me!
-- Henry Ford Arts and Entertainment
"Mothers spend a lifetime excising from their sons the influence of their fathers." (Arthur Lotti) There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
-- George Santayana The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
- Clinton aide George Stephanopolous speaking on Larry King Live "I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." (James Madison) Music is the art of thinking with sounds.
-- Jules Combarieu Arts and Entertainment The mistakes are all waiting to be made.
- chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956) on the game's opening position Problems worthy of attack prove their worth by fighting back.
- Paul Erdos I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for
half the money.
-- Arthur Godfrey Arts and Entertainment
What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is
the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset.
-- Crowf "Great indebtedness does not make men grateful, but vengeful; and if a little charity is not forgotten, it turns into a gnawing worm." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Thus Spake Zarathustra) "I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio." (Joan Rivers) "Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to
vote for Colonel Sanders.
-- Bob Inglis, 1995 Arts and Entertainment Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." (William Blake) Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is
not a conservative, has no brains.
-- Winston Churchill Arts and Entertainment
The crime bill passed by the Senate would reinstate the Federal death penalty for certain violent
crimes: assassinating the President; hijacking an airliner; and murdering a government poultry
inspe Guys are lucky because they get to grow mustaches. I wish I could. It's like having a little pet for
your face.
-- Anita Wise We live at a time when man believes himself fabulously capable of creation, but he does not
know what to create.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset "I run to see who has the most guts." (Steve Roland Prefontaine) My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it. Arts and Entertainment To teach is to learn twice.
-- Joseph Joubert Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to.
-- Shane Leslie "Man was born free and everywhere he is in chains." (Jean-Jacques Rousseau, French philosopher, The Social Contract) Arts and Entertainment
"It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so." (Mark Twain) Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
-- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz "Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under." (Henry Louis Mencken) There is only one kind of love, but there are a thousand imitations.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld "A true friend stabs you in the front." (Oscar Wilde) Arts and Entertainment Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. A weed is no more than a flower in disguise.
-- James Lowell "Those who feel certainty are stupid and those with any imagination or understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Arts and Entertainment
"Have love for your friend up to a limit for it is possible he may turn into your enemy some day; and hate your enemy up to a limit for it is possible he may turn into your friend some day." (Ali bin There's nothing wrong with having nothing to say -- unless you insist on saying it.
-- Anonymous Assassins!
-- Arturo Toscanini, to his orchestra Better watch out that you won't become a television set in your next life.
--Loesje A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos Arts and Entertainment "Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker
room is the temple where they worship arrested development.
-- Russell Baker Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing
matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner.
-- Amy Bloom Arts and Entertainment
Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.
-- Milton Friedman In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that
no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.
-- Paul Dirac One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: "Give little, give seldom, and above all,
give grudgingly." Otherwise, what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of
sexual That's the nature of research--you don't know what in hell you're doing.
-- 'Doc' Edgerton To realize that you do not understand is a virtue;
Not to realize that you do not understand is a defect.
--Lao-Tzu, "Tao Teh Ching" Arts and Entertainment Mistakes are the portals of discovery.
-- James Joyce In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been
widely regarded as a bad move.
-- Douglas Adams "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Arts and Entertainment
Spinster: A bachelor's wife. That's the way things come clear. All of a sudden. And then you realize how obvious they've been
all along.
-- Madeleine L'Engle Change is not merely necessary to life, it is life.
-- Alvin Toffler Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control. Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.
Rabbi Julius Gordon Arts and Entertainment I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law.
-- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes. If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
- Carl Sagan "The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right." (Mark Twain) Arts and Entertainment
If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile.
-- Lynda Barry blah "It is a grand mistake to think of being great without goodness and I pronounce it as certain that there was never a truly great man that was not at the same time truly virtuous." (Benjamin Fran "I'll tell you something: Luxury disgusts me." (Giorgio Armani) See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails?
-- Will Rogers, to his niece on seeing the Venus de Milo The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one. Arts and Entertainment May you be too good for the world and not good enough for your wife. "We already have the statistics for the future: the growth percentages of pollution, overpopulation, desertification. The future is already in place." (Günther Grass, Winner of the Nobel Prize for Li "The perception of beauty is a moral test." (Henry David Thoreau) Arts and Entertainment
There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson "The only man who behaved sensibly was my tailor; he took my measurement anew every time he saw me, while all the rest went on with their old measurements and expected them to fit me." (George Bernar Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
- Mark Twain The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
-- Joseph Heller, God Knows Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc
jockey is not allowed to talk.
-- Fran Lebowitz Arts and Entertainment "Thanks to my solid academic training, today I can write hundreds of words on virtually any topic without possessing a shred of information, which is how I got a good job in journalism." (Dave Barry) If you cannot be the master of your language, you must be its slave. If you cannot examine your
thoughts, you have no choice but to think them, however silly they may be.
-- Richard Mitchell, from You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec Arts and Entertainment
UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.
- Ludwig Wittgenstein If I were to try to read, much less answer, all the attacks made on me, this shop might as well be
closed for any other business.
-- Abraham Lincoln Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely
been detected.
-- Oscar Wilde I didn't accept it. I received it.
-- Richard Allen, National Security Advisor to President Reagan, explaining the $1000 in cash and
two watches he was given by two Japanese journalists after he hel Arts and Entertainment The great tragedy of science, the slaying of a beautiful theory by an ugly fact.
-- Thomas Henry Huxley "Hold the fort! I am coming!" (General William Tecumseh Sherman) Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
-- Carl Gustav Jung Arts and Entertainment
