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Lanchester Links

Welcome to Lanchester - Description of the village with photographs and map, short guide to All Saints Parish Church, famous local historical figures and a brief history of the roman fort of Longovicium, .

Lanchester E.P. Primary School - Provide junior, infant and nursery education. Includes information on classes, clubs and school visits.

Lanchester Brass Band - Offers information on concert schedules, news, personnel, members. Includes photographs and sound files.

Kiwi Physiotherapy Services - Musculoskeletal physiotherapists offering a range of treatment modalities including manipulation, exercise therapy, acupuncture for pain relief, electrotherapy, traction and injection therapy.

All Saints Catholic Church - Includes a history and virtual tour, notice board, services and Mass times.

It's important to be open-minded, but not SO open-minded that your brains fall out. -- Rick Radebaugh Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm. -- John F. Kennedy "Courageous, untroubled, mocking and violent--that is what Wisdom wants us to be. Wisdom is a woman, and loves only a warrior." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl. -- Charlie Chaplin "When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of all the other men of her acquaintance for the inattention of just one." (Helen Rowland) Lanchester Marriage was all a woman's idea and for man's acceptance of the pretty yoke, it becomes us to be grateful. -- Phyllis McGinley Reading computer manuals without the hardware is a frustrating as reading sex manuals without the software. -- Arthur C. Clarke A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government. -- Edward Abbey Lanchester The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved. -- Mother Teresa If we were not all so interested in ourselves, life would be so uninteresting that none of us would be able to endure it. -- Schopenhauer "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g blah "There is a melancholy that stems from greatness." (Sébastien-Roch Nicolas Chamfort, 1740/41-1794) May the road rise to meet you. May the wind always be at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face, the rains fall soft upon your fields and, until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm Lanchester The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. -- Albert Einstein "I was lousy in school. Real screwed-up. A moron. I was antisocial and didn't bother with the other kids. A really bad student. I didn't have any brains. I didn't know what I was doing there. That's w Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up. -- Robert Frost Lanchester The covers of this book are too far apart. -- Ambrose Bierce Author: A fool, who, not content with having bored those who have lived with him, insists on tormenting the generations to come. -- Montesquieu A small family is soon provided for. -- English Proverb It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail. -- Gore Vidal Since Eve ate the apple, much depends on dinner. -- Lord Byron Lanchester Truth often suffers more by the heat of its defenders than the arguments of its opposers. -- William Penn A man in the house is worth two in the street. -- Mae West I don't know anything about luck. I've never banked on it, and I'm afraid of people who do. Luck to me is something else; hard work and realizing what is opportunity and what isn't. -- Lucille Ball Lanchester What I have to say is far more important than how long my eyelashes are. -- Alanis Morissette, singer, 1995 Hell is a half-filled auditorium. - Robert Frost The community stagnates without the impulse of the individual. The impulse dies away without the sympathy of the community. -- William James Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately becomes consumed by distasteful sexual fantasies which involve doing uncomfortable things in those tiny toil What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death. -- Dave Barry Lanchester "Great indebtedness does not make men grateful, but vengeful; and if a little charity is not forgotten, it turns into a gnawing worm." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Thus Spake Zarathustra) We always believe our first love is our last, and our last love our first. -- Anonymous "That government is best which governs the least, because its people discipline themselves." (Thomas Jefferson) Lanchester There is a coherent plan in the universe, though I don't know what it's a plan for. -- Fred Hoyle "The perception of beauty is a moral test." (Henry David Thoreau) Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy. -- Groucho Marx A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy. -- Friedrich Nietzsche Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. -- Irwin Corey Lanchester We are the echo of the future. -- W. S. Merwin If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not a poet enough to call forth its riches; for to the creator there is no poverty and no poor indifferent p He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke. -- Terry Cohen Lanchester A clever man commits no minor blunders. - Goethe Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work. - Robert Orben "In order to keep anything cultural, logical, or ideological, you have to reinvent the reality of it." (Ani Difranco) "If a man has good corn, or wood, or boards, or pigs to sell, or can make better chairs or knives, crucibles, or church organs, than anybody else, you will find a broad, hard-beaten road to his house, "If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they don't want to hear." (George Orwell) Lanchester There's nothing wrong with having nothing to say -- unless you insist on saying it. -- Anonymous Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc jockey is not allowed to talk. -- Fran Lebowitz Count your age with friends but not with years. -- Anonymous Lanchester Good hours, excellent pay, fun place to work, paid training, mean boss. Oh well, four out of five isn't bad. -- Help Wanted Ad, PA newspaper, 1994 I feel that if a person has problems communicating the very least he can do is to shut up. -- Tom Lehrer Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc jockey is not allowed to talk. -- Fran Lebowitz All you need is love. -- The Beatles, song title If the headache would only precede the intoxication, alcoholism would be a virtue. -- Samuel Butler Lanchester Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passions, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence. -- John Adams The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. -- S. T. Coleridge "I have great faith in fools; My friends call it self-confidence." (Edger Allen Poe) Lanchester We have to keep trying things we're not sure we can pull off. If we just do the things we know we can do... you don't grow as much. You gotta take those chances on making those big mistakes. -- Cybi Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love. -- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz In a cat's eyes, all things belong to cats. -- English Proverb "It is neccessary to have wished for death in order to know how good it is to live." (Alexander Dumas) Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. -- Oscar Wilde Lanchester There are some things which cannot be learned quickly, and time, which is all we have, must be paid heavily for their acquiring. They are the very simplest things and, because it takes a man's life I hate work. That's why I got married. -- Peg Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show To take what there "is", and use it, without waiting forever in vain for the preconceived - to dig deep into the actual and get something out of that - this doubtless is the right way to live. -- H Lanchester Nothing that was worthy in the past departs; no truth or goodness realized by man ever dies, or can die. -- Thomas Carlyle The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children. -- Clarence Darrow 'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart. -- ee cummings Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do. -- Dr. Benjamin Spock, American pediatrician, address to new parents "Defeat the fear of death and welcome the death of fear." (G. Gordon Liddy) Lanchester When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws. The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting. -- Gloria Leonard The great end of life is not knowledge, but action. What men need is as much knowledge as they can organize for action; give them more and it may become injurious. Some men are heavy and stupid from Lanchester All virtue is summed up in dealing justly. -- Aristotle The worth of the state, in the long run, is the worth of the individuals composing it. -- John Stuart Mill "If I work toward an end, meantime I am confined to a process. The rainbow is more beautiful than the pot at the end of it, because the rainbow is now. And the pot never turns out to be quite what I e The louder he talked of his honour, the faster we counted our spoons. -- Emerson, Ralph Waldo "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain -- and most fools do." (Dale Carnegie) Lanchester "Education must have an end in view, for it is not an end in itself." (Sybil Marshall) "Goodwill is the only asset that competition cannot undersell or destroy." (Mrshall Field, businessman and philanthropist) "One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Lanchester You can close your eyes to reality, but not to memories. -- Stanislaw J. Lem The optimist sees opportunity in every danger; the pessimist sees danger in every opportunity. -- Winston Churchill You have it easily in your power to increase the sum total of this world's happiness now. How? By giving a few words of sincere appreciation to someone who is lonely or discouraged. Perhaps you will "What is most appealing about young folks, after all, is the changes, not the still photograph of finished character but the movie, the soul in flux." (Thomas Pynchon) ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge. -- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Lanchester "Things do not change, we change." (Henry David Thoreau) If a thing is worth doing at all, it is worth doing badly. -- Gustav Holst, on amateur music-making Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on a date. -- Caroline Rhea Lanchester
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