Lakeside Magic Concerts 2004 - A series of concerts of various styles organized by Court Productions at Kingston Maurward College on the edge of the town. Includes details of the individual concerts, the venue and booking details.
Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of
hers.
-- Anonymous Women and Cats will do as they please. Men and dogs had better get used to it.
-- Robert Heinlein, Time Enough for Love, Lazarus Long If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.
-- Marcus Aurelius "Twelve magicians and two carnies have been shot dead doing the bullet catch. That's cool enough, but every night when we close our show with that trick and the loaded gun gets pointed in my face, it "Vegiburgers are wrong." (Mike Kaup) Dorchester The fantasy which serves as a support for the figure of the Stalinist Communist is therefore
exactly the same as the fantasy which is at work in the Tom and Jerry cartoons.
-- Slavoj Zizek 2,400,000 Americans play the accordian - hopefully not at the same time.
-- inside of a Pepsi cap No one finds life worth living; he must make it worth living.
-- Anon. Dorchester
"To live is to dream and to die is to awaken." (Anonymous) "People have to talk about something just to keep their voice boxes in working order so they'll have good voice boxes in case there's ever anything really meaningful to say." (Kurt Vonnegut) If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.
- J. Paul Getty I have read your book and much like it.
-- Moses Hadas, book reviewer The only thing you will ever be able to say in the so-called 'social' sciences is: "some do, some
don't."
-- Ernest Rutherford Dorchester One may have a blazing hearth in one's soul and yet no one ever comes to sit by it. Passersby
see only a wisp of smoke rising from the chimney and continue on their way.
-- Vincent Van Gogh The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance This is the miracle that happens every time to those who really love; the more they give, the more
they possess.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke Dorchester
I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal We must become the change we want to see.
-- Gandhi He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that.
-- John Stuart Mill "Beauty awakens the soul to act." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) >From error to error one discovers the entire truth.
-- Sigmund Freud Dorchester Everything that can be invented has been invented.
- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899 A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top.
-- James Reston One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do
what he was afraid he couldn't do.
-- Henry Ford Dorchester
My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
-- Christopher Morley A wasted youth is better by far than a wise and productive old age.
-- Meat Loaf, from the song "Wasted Youth" on the album Bat Out of Hell II If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves "If you believe everything you read, you better not read." (Japanese Proverb) What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words Dorchester When you're away, I'm restless, lonely
Wretched, bored, dejected; only
here's the rub, my darling dear,
I feel the same when you are here.
-- Samuel Hoffenstein Women are like tea bags; put them in hot water and they get stronger.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt Propel, propel, propel your craft softly down liquid solution. Ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically,
ecstatically, Existence is simply illusion.
-- Fred Rogers, parody of "Row, row, row your boa Dorchester
The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by
trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by l What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
-- Woody Allen If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.
-- Anonymous The less a man thinks or knows about his virtues, the better we like him.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
- Niels Bohr Dorchester "We have to be able to criticise what we love, to say what we have to say 'cause if your not trying to make something better, than as far as I can tell, you are just in the way." (Ani Difranco) Ne'er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to put her in.
-- Benjamin Franklin "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) Dorchester
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not
there, I go to work.
- Robert Orben Live your questions now, and perhaps even without knowing it, you will live along some distant
day into your answers.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke Shotgun wedding: a case of wife or death Church is only society on earth that exists for the benefit of non-members.
-- William Temple Creativity is piercing the mundane to find the marvelous.
-- Bill Moyers Dorchester Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control. "I have the terrible feeling that, because I am wearing a white beard and am sitting in the back of the theatre, you expect me to tell you the truth about something. These are the cheap seats, not Mou One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is
terribly important.
-- Bertrand Russell Dorchester
People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election.
-- Otto von Bismarck Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains or slavery? Forbid it,
Almighty God! I know not what course others may take but as for me; give me liberty or give me
de I base my fashion sense on what doesn't itch.
-- Gilda Radner "Politics is my hobby. Smut is my vocation." (Larry Flynt) It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
- Albert Einstein Dorchester "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries." (A. A. Milne) It is because modern education is so seldom inspired by a great hope that it so seldom achieves
great results. The wish to preserve the past rather that the hope of creating the future dominates
the I am about to--or I am going to--die; either expression is used.
-- Dominique Bouhours, French grammarian, dying words Dorchester
your daughters marry men of substance: gypsies with two bears. "Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching." (Satchel Paige) Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for
him.
-- Rich Little "If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there is an instinct for freedom, there are opportunities to change things, there's a chance for you t Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love. The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In
this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.
-- Marianne Williamson Dorchester I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th "Not only is there no guarantee of the temporal immortality of the human soul, that is to say of its eternal survival after death; but, in any case, this assumption completely fails to accomplish the Dorchester
We seek the comfort of another. Someone to share and share the life we choose. Someone to
help us through the neverending attempt to understand ourselves. And in the end, someone to
comfort us along Love makes the time pass. Time makes love pass.
-- French Proverb The bottom line is that (a) people are never perfect, but love can be, (b) that is the one and only
way that the mediocre and vile can be transformed, and (c) doing that makes it that. We waste
time I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
-- Douglas Adams Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree
to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. you only need a heart full
of grac Dorchester "Good taste is the first refuge of the non-creative. It is the last-ditch stand of the artist." (Marshall McLuhan) Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any
antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.
-- Alfred Hitchcock Silence is as full of potential wisdom and wit as the unhewn marble of a great sculpture.
-- Aldous Huxley Dorchester
"Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since at least half the sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would
be doing if he were alive today?
1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.
2) Advising the President.
3) D When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if
I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now
comple The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because
generally they are the same people.
-- G. K. Chesterton Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him. -- Rich Little Dorchester If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough.
- Mario Andretti I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.
-- Mark Twain "Posterity: you will never know how much it has cost my generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make good use of it." (John Quincy Adams) Dorchester
Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
-- Anonymous I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department
store and he asked for my autograph.
-- Shirley Temple Black A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your
girdle when your hips stick.
-- Ogden Nash Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.
-- Ambrose Bierce Dorchester My good intentions are completely lethal.
-- Margaret Atwood "It is the nature of a man as he grows older, a small bridge in time, to protest against change, particularly change for the better." (John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley) Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever. Dorchester
