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The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw He who kisses the joy is it flies lives in eternity's sunrise
-- William Blake "Not only is there no guarantee of the temporal immortality of the human soul, that is to say of its eternal survival after death; but, in any case, this assumption completely fails to accomplish the Feeding the hungry is a greater work than raising the dead.
-- Saint John Chrysostom A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
- Frank Lloyd Wright Felsted If I were a girl, I'd despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve
them.
-- Robert Graves Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit. The first duty of a lecturer: to hand you after an hour's discourse a nugget of pure truth to wrap up
between the pages of your notebooks, and keep on the mantlepiece forever.
-- Virginia Woolf Felsted
When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of
the world.
- George Washington Carver No one can earn a million dollars honestly.
- William Jennings Bryan I was nauseous and tingly all over... I was either in love or I had smallpox.
-- Woody Allen Spinster: A bachelor's wife. Dignity does not consist in possessing honors, but in deserving them.
-- Aristotle Felsted I am beginning to suspect all elaborate and special systems of education. They seem to me to be
built upon the supposition that every child is a kind of idiot who must be taught to think.
-- Anne S "One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage.
-- Ambrose Bierce Felsted
I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to
know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.
- Clarence Darrow, The days just before marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book. The bottom line is that (a) people are never perfect, but love can be, (b) that is the one and only
way that the mediocre and vile can be transformed, and (c) doing that makes it that. We waste
time Every man knows his follies and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
-- Josh Billings He early on let her know who is the boss. He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're
the boss."
-- Anonymous Felsted The soul is healed by being with children.
-- Fyodor Dostoyevski They gave me a book of checks. They didn't ask for any deposits.
-- Joe Early, Congressman (D-Mass), at a press conference to answer questions about the
House Bank scandal Free will is a golden thread running through the frozen matrix of fixed events.
-- Robert A. Heinlein _The Rolling Stones_ Felsted
Age does not make us childish, as some say; it finds us true children.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe The gods gave man fire and he invented fire engines. They gave him love and he invented marriage. Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
-- Carl Friedrich Gauss, when informed that his wife was dying Why doesn't she like me? Is it my hair, my overbite, the fact that I've worn the same shirt and
shorts for the last four years?
-- Bart Simpson, young character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated tele In the end, everything is a gag.
- Charlie Chaplin Felsted If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.
-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada "If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing." (Anatole France) Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon
them.
-- Anonymous Felsted
The better part of valor is discretion.
-- William Shakespeare 1564-1616 from King Henry the Fourth, Part I It is a known fact that men are practical, hardheaded realists, in contrast to women, who are
romantic dreamers and actually believe that estrogenic skin cream must do something or they
couldn't cha "When even one American--who has done nothing wrong--is forced by fear to shut his mind and close his mouth--then all Americans are in peril." (Harry S. Truman) Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
-- Groucho Marx The unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the
bad ones.
-- W. Somerset Maugham Felsted When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West "When thou art at Rome, do as they do at Rome." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) "In my opinion, the greatest single failure of American education is that students come away unable to distinguish between a symbol and the thing the symbol stands for." (Paul Lutus) Felsted
"If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they don't want to hear." (George Orwell) Vitality shows in not only the ability to persist but the ability to start over.
-- F. Scott Fitzgerald If it were weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
-- Rodney Dangerfield Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.
- Martin Fraquhar Tupper The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal consistency of the women who
love me.
-- George Bernard Shaw Felsted Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
-- Carol Burnett Everywhere I go, I'm asked if the universities stifle writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle
enough of them.
-- Flannery O'Connor The grass may be greener on the other side of the fence, but you still have to mow it.
-- Anonymous Felsted
Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same
thing nowadays.
-- Oscar Wilde "Jesus died too soon. If he had lived to my age he would have repudiated his doctrine." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist---
-- John B. Sedgwick, general, dying words, 1864 We trained hard - but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams we were
reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing,
and I think of my wife and I think of Lot, and I think of the lucky break he got. Felsted Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
- Napoleon Bonaparte God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at
the same time.
- Robin Williams, commenting on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair Love is blind -- marriage is the eye-opener.
-- Pauline Thomason Felsted
Don't look back -- something might be gaining on you.
-- Satchel Paige Dew knot trussed yore spell chequer two fined awl yore mistakes.
-- Brendan Hills If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
- Will Rogers We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.
-- Decca Recording Company, rejecting the Beatles, 1962 The better part of one's life consists of his friendships.
-- Abraham Lincoln Felsted He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that.
-- John Stuart Mill The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt The telephone company is urging people to *please* not use the telephone unless it is absolutely
necessary in order to keep the lines open for emergency personnel. We'll be right back after this
bre Felsted
"One of the good things about low self-esteem is never having rain hit you in the face." (John A. Simone Jr.) Cute little babies that fall out of swings - These are a few of my favourite things.
-- Oscar Hammerstein, working lyric for a piece from "The Sound of Music" We have been friends together in sunshine and in shade.
-- Caroline Norton I'm not dumb, I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
-- Calvin Never judge a book by its movie.
-- J. W. Eagan Felsted "I run to see who has the most guts." (Steve Roland Prefontaine) Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.
-- Albert Camus If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wright Felsted
To achieve the impossible, it is precisely the unthinkable that must be thought.
-- Tom Robbins, Jitterbug Perfume Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it, and then misapplying the
wrong remedies.
-- Groucho Marx These people have served a longer sentence than some people who have committed murder.
-- Jeff Greenfield, news analyst, describing the jury in the OJ Simpson murder trial, 1995 When you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research.
-- Wilson Mizner Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw Felsted 2,400,000 Americans play the accordian - hopefully not at the same time.
-- inside of a Pepsi cap I am become death, shatterer of worlds.
-- Robert J. Oppenheimer, citing from the Bhagavadgita, after witnessing the world's first nuclear
explosion The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault.
- Henry Kissinger Felsted
Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.
-- Oscar Wilde "...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes) Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark
in one another.
-- Kenny Ausubel "Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What?! You too! Thought I was the only one.'" (Clive Staples Lewis) Say goodbye to the oldies, but goodies, because the good old days weren't always good and
tomorrow aint as bad as it seems.
-- Billy Joel Felsted The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
-- B. F. Skinner Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
-- Albert Einstein I am going to put myself to sleep now for a bit longer than usual. Call the time Eternity." (Jerzy Kosinski, Polish novelist, from his suicide note) Felsted
