"Take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame." (Erica Jong) A straight line is the shortest in morals as in mathematics.
-- Maria Edgeworth Ridicule is generally made use of to laugh men out of virtue and good sense, by attacking
everything praiseworthy in human life.
-- Joseph Addison If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
-- Harry Shearer "People drag their progeny around with them like a ball and chain, like some terrible deadweight that hinders their every move - and that, as often as not, effectively winds up killing them." (Michel Local Councils The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing that you will make one.
-- Ellen Hubbard Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
-- Groucho Marx "When a hundred men stand together, each of them loses his mind and gets another one." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Local Councils
Intelligence has nothing to do with politics.
-- Londo Molari "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like
toxic waste.
-- David Bissonette I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
-- Katherine Cebrian blah "If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves." (Thomas Alva Edison) Local Councils The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be.
-- Paul Valery There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
-- Will Rogers Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
-- Samuel Paterson Local Councils
I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put
over my kitchen table.
-- Rodney Dangerfield Be willing to make decisions. That's the most important quality in a good leader. Don't fall victim
to what I call the 'ready-aim-aim-aim-aim syndrome.' You must be willing to fire.
-- Gen. George "To pretend, I actually do the thing: I have therefore only pretended to pretend." (Jacques Derrida, French 'deconstructionist') Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais Never express yourself more clearly than you are able to think.
-- Niels Bohr Local Councils Drink to me.
-- Pablo Picasso, dying words The possibility that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause
we believe to be just.
-- Abraham Lincoln Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right.
-- Henry Ford Local Councils
The only thing you take with you when you're gone is what you leave behind.
-- John Allston And since the stench of death will always attract flies and vermin, the arrival of Geraldo was
perhaps inevitable.
-- Garry Trudeau In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
-- Charlie Brown, character in "Peanuts" comic strip, created by Charles Schultz Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.
-- Mark Twain "It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question." (Eugene Ionesco) Local Councils "I owe much to my friends; but, all things considered, it strikes me that I owe even more to my enemies. The real person springs life under a sting even better than under a caress." (André Gide) "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." (Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.) An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets the more interested
he is in her.
-- Agatha Christie Local Councils
Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
- Saint Augustine We must become the change we want to see.
-- Gandhi "I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." (James Madison) Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of
hers.
-- Anonymous Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp Local Councils Not everything that can be counted counts; and not everything that counts can be counted.
-- Albert Einstein Cute little babies that fall out of swings - These are a few of my favourite things.
-- Oscar Hammerstein, working lyric for a piece from "The Sound of Music" When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Local Councils
He who dies a thousand deaths meets the final hour with the calmness of one who approaches a
well remembered door.
-- Heywood Brown I couldn't remember when I had been so disappointed. Except perhaps the time I found out that
M&Ms really do melt in your hand...
-- Peter Oakley A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
-- Douglas Adams There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
- Frank Zappa Local Councils Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Anyone nit-picking enough to write a letter of correction to an editor doubtless deserves the error
that provoked it.
-- Alvin Toffler "We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police." (Jeff Marder) Local Councils
The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. "One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) If someone had told me I would be Pope one day, I would have studied harder.
-- Pope John Paul I There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of
bread.
- Mahatma Gandhi "In large states public education will always be mediocre, for the same reason that in large kitchens the cooking is usually bad." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Local Councils Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the
unpalatable.
-- John Kenneth Galbraith "To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "You exist only in what you do." (Federico Fellini) Local Councils
Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
-- Oscar Levant, to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee "I don't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones." (John Cage) Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
- Jimmy Durante Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness.
-- Madame de Rieux "Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) Local Councils Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as
children.
-- Libby Gelman-Waxner "True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it is lost." (Charles Caleb Colton) Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes
some method of fortifying the human soul and enabline it to make its peace with its destiny.
-- George Local Councils
For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.
-- Clifton Fadiman Whoever controls the media--the images--controls the culture.
-- Allen Ginsberg Cricket is best described as organised loafing.
-- Anonymous British Radio Broadcaster, 1996 Character is what you are in the dark.
-- Dwight L. Moody "I feel I have to protect myself against things. So I'm pretty careful to lose most of them." (George Orson Welles) Local Councils Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
-- H. L. Mencken "I learned more from the one restaurant that didn't work than from all the ones that were successes." (Wolfgang Puck, restauranteur) "One pretty good definition of college is that it's a place where people are made to read difficult books." (Jonathan Franzen) Local Councils
Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop.
-- Anonymous "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Discovery consists of looking at the same thing as everyone else does and thinking something
different.
-- Albert Szent-Gyorgyi, 1937 Nobel Prize in Physiology and Medicine It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
-- Tom Robbins, Still Life With Woodpecker In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice
that I am not a Republican.
-- H. L. Mencken Local Councils "If you light a man a fire, he will be warm for a day; if you light a man on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life." (Anonymous) If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
-- Aristotle Onassis your daughters marry men of substance: gypsies with two bears. Local Councils
In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice
that I am not a Republican.
-- H. L. Mencken The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their
attitudes of mind.
-- William James The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing that you will make one.
-- Ellen Hubbard Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of
the time.
-- E. B. White Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday
afternoon.
-- Susan Ertz Local Councils "Plato was a bore." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein "The key to wisdom is knowing all the right questions." (John A. Simone Jr.) Local Councils
