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Elswick Links

Logopad - Design and print business cards, signs, brochures, desk pads, forms, and banners.
Elswick Women's Institute - A branch of the social, charity, and campaigning organisation. Includes images of various group activities, an events calendar, and contact details.
Thornton House - Situated in the centre of the small village of Elswick. Includes description and photographs of the facilities, a map and contact details.
Love is stronger than justice. -- Sting The work of internal government has become the task of controlling the thousands of fifth-rate men. -- Henry B. Adams Someone once asked me why women don't gamble as much as men do and I gave the commonsensical reply that we don't have as much money. That was a true but incomplete answer. In fact, women's total ins If one advances confidently in the direction of one's dreams, and endeavours to live the life which one has imagined, one will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. -- Henry David Thoreau Acting is the most minor of gifts and not a very high-class way to earn a living. After all, Shirley Temple could do it at the age of four. -- Katharine Hepburn Elswick One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: "Give little, give seldom, and above all, give grudgingly." Otherwise, what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual "We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly." (Bill Mahe Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man. -- Samuel Goldwyn, immigrant-turned-famous-movie-producer, when told his son was getting married Elswick We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough? - Niels Bohr "What is most appealing about young folks, after all, is the changes, not the still photograph of finished character but the movie, the soul in flux." (Thomas Pynchon) Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to criticize others. -- H. Jackson Brown There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage -- Martin Luther No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in. -- Anon. Elswick Ordinary riches can be stolen, real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you. -- Oscar Wilde This is the fourth? -- Thomas Jefferson, dying words Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by heart and his friends can only read the title. -- Virginia Woolf Elswick I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back. -- Zsa Zsa Gabor When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall looking frantic. -- Steven Wright "Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it. -- George Bernard Shaw "I offer images; I conjure memories of freedom that can still be reached ... But, we can only open the doors. We can't drag people through. I can't free them unless they want to be free--more than any Elswick If ever two were one, then surely we. If ever man were loved by wife, then thee. -- Anne Bradstreet Cricket is best described as organised loafing. -- Anonymous British Radio Broadcaster, 1996 Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly. -- Simeon Strunsky Elswick I find television very educating. Every time sombody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. -- Groucho Marx Feminists are OK, I just wouldn't want my sister to marry one I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. - Galileo Galilei If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be called research, would it? -- Albert Einstein The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good. - Samuel Johnson Elswick "Today was good. / Today was fun. / Tomorrow is another one." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. -- Erma Bombeck If there is any one proof of a man's incompetence, it is the stagnant mentality of a worker who, doing some small routine job in a vast undertaking, does not care to look beyond the lever of a machi Elswick Marriage is a trip between Niagara Falls and Reno. "I'm the artist formally known as Beck. I have a genius wig. When I put that wig on, then the true genius emerges. I don't have enough hair to be a genius. I think you have to have hair going everywhe "No one lies so boldly as the man who is indignant." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. -- Anton Chekhov In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move. -- Douglas Adams Elswick Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for the greatest fool may ask more than the wisest man can answer. -- Charles Caleb Colton "Teacher played hooky. Sent message: 'Receiving instruction. Enjoying myself thoroughly. See you next week.'" (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. -- Joseph Addison Elswick Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy-- the mother. -- Claudette Colbert "I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." (James Madison) Call on God, but row away from the rocks. -- Indian proverb Victory belongs to the most persevering. -- Napoleon Bonaparte People, like nails, lose their effectiveness when they lose direction and begin to bend. -- Walter Savage Landor Elswick Books had instant replay long before televised sports. -- Bern Williams Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done. -- Ernie Kovacs "O' What may man within him hide, though angel on the outward side!" (William Shakespeare) Elswick Saying that men talk about baseball in order to avoid talking about their feelings is the same as saying that women talk about their feelings in order to avoid talking about baseball. -- Deborah Tan They're almost inseparable. Sometimes it takes ten people to separate them. -- Anonymous Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity. Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness. -- Madame de Rieux Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times. -- Jonson, Ben Elswick "A conservative is a man who sits and thinks, mostly sits." (Woodrow Wilson, 28th US president, 1856-1924) We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified. -- Aesop "If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing." (Anatole France) Elswick "I'm the artist formally known as Beck. I have a genius wig. When I put that wig on, then the true genius emerges. I don't have enough hair to be a genius. I think you have to have hair going everywhe In the blithe days of honeymoon, With Kate's allurements smitten, I lov'd her late, I lov'd her soon, And call'd her dearest kitten. But now my kitten's grown a cat, And cross like other wives. Friends applaud, the Comedy is over. -- Ludwig von Beethoven, dying words The great art of life is sensation, to feel that we exist, even in pain. -- Lord Byron He who hesitates is a damned fool. - Mae West Elswick I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. - Galileo Galilei Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too. -- H. L. Mencken Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve. -- George Bernard Shaw Elswick Love is an emotion that is based on an opinion of women that is impossible for those who have had any experience with them. -- H. L. Mencken You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty. - Sacha Guitry If all men were brothers, would you let one marry your sister? I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about 'short' and 'cheap'? -- Phyllis Diller The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation. -- Henry David Thoreau, Walden (1854) Elswick "There is nothing more fearful than ignorance in action." (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, 1749-1832, Criticisms, Reflections and Maxims) I hate mankind, for I think myself to be one of them, and I know how bad I am. -- Samuel Johnson "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Elswick "The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none." (Thomas Carlyle, 1795-1881) If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling. -- Paula Poundstone "Ah! Don't say you agree with me. When people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong." (Oscar Wilde) Health food makes me sick. -- Calvin Trillin Elswick "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g The Churches must learn humility as well as teach it. -- George Bernard Shaw, St. Joan Does anal retentive have a hyphen? -- Seen on a t-shirt Elswick All women are born evil. Some just realize their potential later in life than others. -- Chad A. Gamble, Escape, short story Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to criticize others. -- H. Jackson Brown I think every woman is entitled to a middle husband she can forget. -- Adela Rogers St. John My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it. One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do. -- Henry Ford Elswick The fate of love is that it always seems too little or too much. -- Anonymous Chase after the truth like all hell and you'll free yourself, even though you never touch its coattails. -- Clarence Darrow "REASONABLE, adj. Accessible to the infection of our own opinions. Hospitable to persuasion, dissuasion and evasion." (Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary) Elswick
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