If you want to recapture your youth, just cut off his allowance.
-- Al Bernstein This isn't right, this isn't even wrong.
- Wolfgang Pauli (1900-1958), upon reading a young physicist's paper The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same
time, and still retain the ability to function.
-- F. Scott Fitzgerald Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
-- Josh Billings Why doesn't she like me? Is it my hair, my overbite, the fact that I've worn the same shirt and
shorts for the last four years?
-- Bart Simpson, young character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated tele B I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
-- Mae West "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.
-- Virginia Woolf B
"For others do I wait ... for higher ones, stronger ones, more triumphant ones, merrier ones, for such as are built squarely in body and soul: laughing lions must come." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The louder he talked of his honour, the faster we counted our spoons.
-- Emerson, Ralph Waldo "Of all mankind the great poet is the equable man." (Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, 1855) "There are no uninteresting things, only uninteresting people." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.
-- Aristotle B There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to
be a coincidence.
-- Jeremy S. Anderson Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe The society of women is the element of good manners.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe B
There are no days in life so memorable as those which vibrated to some stroke of the
imagination.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson There is no course of life so weak and sottish as that which is managed by order, method, and
discipline.
-- Michel de Montaigne "Dreams are the touchstones of our personality." (Henry David Thoreau) "Now that we have everything we need, we discover that there is almost nothing that we have that we want." (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open.
-- Thomas Dewar B Choose a wife by your ear than your eye.
-- Thomas Fuller, 1732 If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get
married.
-- Katharine Hepburn If excessive smoking actually plays a role in the production of lung cancer, it seems to be a minor
one.
-- Dr. W.C. Heuper of the National Cancer Institute, as quoted in the New York Times on Apri B
Even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim
poses.
-- John Weitz, American Designer The west wasn't won on salad.
-- ND Beef Council, billboard advertisement, 1990 My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it.
-- Abraham Lincoln "Courageous, untroubled, mocking and violent--that is what Wisdom wants us to be. Wisdom is a woman, and loves only a warrior." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
-- Eleanor Roosevelt B I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules, including:
* Both of your socks should always be the same color
* Or they should at least both be fairly dark
-- Dave Barry Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
-- Albert Einstein Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you
together, but do so with all your heart.
-- Marcus Aurelius B
I want to die in my sleep like my friend.... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his
car.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker Nobody is more dangerous than he who imagines himself pure in heart; for his purity, by
definition, is unassailable.
-- James Baldwin, Nobody Knows My Name, 1961 I was a pilot flying an airplane and it just so happened that where I was flying made what I was
doing spying.
-- Francis Gary Power, U-2 reconnaissance pilot held by the Soviets for spying, in an i Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. "The love of liberty is the love of others; the love of power is the love of ourselves." (William Hazlitt) B Consequences, schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich!
-- Chuck Jones-directed cartoon "Death solves all problems--no man, no problem." (Josef Stalin) If Satan ever loses his hair, there'll be hell toupee.
-- Anonymous B
At every crossroads on the path that leads to the future, tradition has placed 10,000 men to guard
the past.
-- Maurice Maeterlink If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.
- George Bernard Shaw The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can.
-- Margo Kaufman "A critic is a man who knows the way but can't drive the car." (Kenneth Tynan) Here's to you and here's to me,
and I hope we never disagree.
But, if that should ever be,
to HELL with you, here's to ME!
-- Anonymous B blah "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." (Thomas Jefferson) Always do right; this will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
-- Mark Twain Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best
to become the best you are capable of becoming.
-- John R. Wooden, Practical Modern Basketball B
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
- Niels Bohr My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music.
-- Vladimir Nabokov Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add
up.
-- Anon My father taught me to work; he did not teach me to love it.
-- Abraham Lincoln Nobody ever died of laughter.
-- Max Beerbohm B Defeat never comes to any man until he admits it.
-- Josephus Daniels What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?
-- Robert Schuller "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) B
Politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it.
-- Tom Robbins A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall "So little done, so much to do." (Cecil Rhodes) Love cures people, both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.
-- Dr. Karl Menninger Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.
-- Josh Billings B The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
-- Lily Tomlin Silence is argument carried out by other means.
-- Ernesto "Che" Guevara "People who cease to believe in God or goodness altogether still believe in the devil. I don't know why. No, I do indeed know why. Evil is always possible. And goodness is eternally difficult." (Anne B
Art consists of limitation. The most beautiful part of every picture is the frame.
-- G. K. Chesterton "I have the terrible feeling that, because I am wearing a white beard and am sitting in the back of the theatre, you expect me to tell you the truth about something. These are the cheap seats, not Mou If everybody is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking.
-- George S. Patton, Jr. There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you
yourself have altered.
-- Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own
language and forthwith it is something entirely different.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe B "Marriage excuses no one the freak's roll-call." (Joe Orton, What the Butler Saw) Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.
-- Michael Leunig blah "Each friend represents a world in us; a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only in meeting them that a new world is born." (Anais Nin) B
"Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don't allow our enemies to have guns, why should we allow them to have ideas?" (Josef Stalin) Friends need not agree in everything or go always together, or have no comparable other
friendships of the same intimacy. On the contrary, in friendship union is more about ideal things:
and in that I have come to the conclusion never again to think of marrying, and for this reason, I can never
be satisfied with anyone who would be blockhead enough to have me.
-- Abraham Lincoln, in a letter to This delivery driver carries no money. His wife has it all. A person should never be ashamed to own that he is wrong, which is but saying in other words
that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.
-- Alexander Pope B "Courage is found in unlikely places." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Women see better than men. Men see lazily, if they do not expect to act. Women see quite
without any wish to act.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe.
-- Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia B
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
-- Will Rogers It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
- G. B. Burgin The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have
to shave twice a day.
-- Adlai Stevenson "The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." (David Russell) "How is it that we never have time to do a job right, but we always have time to do it over?" (Anonymous) B "I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio." (Joan Rivers) Truth must necessarily be stranger than fiction, for fiction is the creation of the human mind and
therefore congenial to it.
-- G. K. Chesterton "I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." (James Madison) B
