It is well, when judging a friend, to remember that he is judging you with the same godlike and
superior impartiality.
-- Arnold Bennett Government is like a baby. An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of
responsibility at the other.
-- Ronald Reagan, Saturday Evening Post, 1965 MARRIAGE, n. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two
slaves, making in all, two.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 We can say 'Peace on Earth,' we can sing about it, preach about it or pray about it, but if we have
not internalized the mythology to make it happen inside us, then it will not be.
-- Betty Shabazz "The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties." (Oscar Wilde) M "I love to doubt as well as know." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree
to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. you only need a heart full
of grac I hate it in friends when they come too late to help.
-- Euripides M
The grass may be greener on the other side of the fence, but you still have to mow it.
-- Anonymous Creativity is piercing the mundane to find the marvelous.
-- Bill Moyers "Growth in wisdom can be measured precisely by decline in bile." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human) "Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time." (E. B. White) If you don't double-click me, I can't do anything.
-- John Aniston, on how computers have taken over his life M A sweetheart is a bottle of wine, a wife is a wine bottle.
-- Baudelaire Cricket is best described as organised loafing.
-- Anonymous British Radio Broadcaster, 1996 Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe M
Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
-- George Bernard Shaw If God created us in His image we have certainly returned the compliment.
-- Voltaire When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him.
-- Thomas Szasz, The Second Sin, 1973 Martyrdom... is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability. George Bernard
Shaw (1856 - 1950), The Devil's Disciple (1901) act 3 Now join your hands, and with your hands your hearts.
-- William Shakespeare, King Henry the Sixth M "Think where mans glory most begins and ends, and say my glory was I had such friends." (William Butler Yeats) "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) Grad school is the snooze button on the clock-radio of life.
-- John Rogers, comedian (who holds a graduate degree in physics) M
"Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back.
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show I am going to put myself to sleep now for a bit longer than usual. Call the time Eternity." (Jerzy Kosinski, Polish novelist, from his suicide note) If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion.
-- George Bernard Shaw Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.
-- Oscar Wilde M A weed is no more than a flower in disguise.
-- James Lowell The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain The difference between false memories and true ones is the same as for jewels: it is always the
false ones that look the most real, the most brilliant.
-- Salvador Dali M
In the end, everything is a gag.
-- Charlie Chaplin Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Anon. Thought is action in rehearsal.
-- Sigmund Freud University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
-- Henry Kissinger "Babies are necessary to grown-ups. A new baby is like the beginning of all things--wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities. In a world that is cutting down its trees to build highways, losing its eart M "All our best men are laughed at in this nightmare land." (Jack Keroac) The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted
in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism.
-- Heidi Hartmann, The Unha Love is only the game that is not called on account of darkness.
-- M. Hirschfield M
The important thing is not to stop questioning.
-- Albert Einstein "No one lies so boldly as the man who is indignant." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.
- Ludwig Wittgenstein A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your
girdle when your hips stick.
-- Ogden Nash If you put garbage in a computer nothing comes out but garbage. But this garbage, having
passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow ennobled and none dare criticize it.
-- Anonymous M "The perception of beauty is a moral test." (Henry David Thoreau) "It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard." (Dorothy Parker, 1893-1967, US writer) There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home.
-- Kenneth H. Olson, President of DEC, Convention of the World Future Society, 1977 M
Love is friendship set on fire.
- Jeremy Taylor The open-minded see the truth in different things: the narrow-minded see only the differences.
-- Author Unknown Once a boy becomes a man, he's a man all his life, but a woman is only sexy until she becomes
your wife.
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
- G. B. Burgin The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins.
-- Heywood Brown M The better part of valor is discretion.
-- William Shakespeare 1564-1616 from King Henry the Fourth, Part I Here's to you and here's to me,
and I hope we never disagree.
But, if that should ever be,
to HELL with you, here's to ME!
-- Anonymous True thinkers are characterised by a blending of clearness and mystery.
-- Victor Hugo M
The first clergyman was the first rascal who met the first fool.
-- Voltaire All human actions are equivalent... and... all are on principle doomed...
-- Jean-Paul Sartre, "Being and Nothingness" Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.
-- Anonymous In the blithe days of honeymoon,
With Kate's allurements smitten,
I lov'd her late, I lov'd her soon,
And call'd her dearest kitten.
But now my kitten's grown a cat,
And cross like other wives.
Prejudice is the child of ignorance.
-- William Hazlitt M To believe in something, and not to live it, is dishonest.
-- Ghandi I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me
is another matter.
- Sir Winston Churchill Never moon a werewolf.
-- Mike Binder M
I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.
-- Nancy Mitford If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. The only real security that a man
will have in this world is a reserve of knowledge, experience, and ability.
-- Henry Ford To achieve the impossible, it is precisely the unthinkable that must be thought.
-- Tom Robbins, Jitterbug Perfume It is never too late to be what you might have been.
-- George Eliot People, like nails, lose their effectiveness when they lose direction and begin to bend.
-- Walter Savage Landor M "There cannot be a God because, if there were one, I would not believe that I was not He." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.
-- Albert Einstein Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf M
When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
-- Hunter S. Thompson Nature gave men two ends - one to sit on and one to think with. Ever since then man's success or
failure has been dependent on the one he used most.
-- George R. Kirkpatrick It is not because it is difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are
difficult.
-- Lucius Anneaus Seneca As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are
certain, they do not refer to reality.
-- Albert Einstein For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.
-- Clifton Fadiman M Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of
our passions, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.
-- John Adams They think they can make fuel from horse manure.... Now, I don't know if your car will be able to
get 30 miles to the gallon, but it's sure gonna put a stop to siphoning.
-- Billie Holliday This search for what you want is like tracking something that doesn't want to be tracked. It takes
time to get a dance right, to create something memorable.
-- Fred Astaire M
Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy-- the
mother.
-- Claudette Colbert "In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes." (Andy Warhol) Society is like a stew. If you don't stir it up every once in a while then a layer of scum floats to the
top.
-- Ed Abbey The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does
not stop until you get into the office.
-- Robert Frost "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar." (Helen Keller) M Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be
feasible.
- A Yale University management professor in response to student Fred Smith's paper prop Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You'd see a flock of birds come by, laughing hysterically!
-- Steven Wright M
