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"Feeding is a very important ritual for me. I don't trust people who don't like to eat." (Gina Gershon) Choose a wife by your ear than your eye.
-- Thomas Fuller, 1732 "I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats." (Woody Allen, in regard to the KKK) Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.
-- Lewis Grizzard To take what there "is", and use it, without waiting forever in vain for the preconceived - to dig
deep into the actual and get something out of that - this doubtless is the right way to live.
-- H Education Husbands are awkward things to deal with; even keeping them in hot water will not make them
tender.
-- Mary Buckley Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.
-- Oliver Herford May the road rise to meet you. May the wind always be at your back. May the sun shine warm
upon your face, the rains fall soft upon your fields and, until we meet again, may God hold you in
the palm Education
Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.
-- Paul Boese The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains.The superior teacher demonstrates. The
great teacher inspires.
-- William Arthur Ward "We always get bored with those whom we bore." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge.
-- Edward Chilton May your wife be a witch who takes after her mother, and may you all live together in a one-room house. Education To read a writer is for me not merely to get an idea of what he says, but to go off with him and travel in his company.
Andre Gide He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
- Abraham Lincoln "The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." (David Russell) Education
The community stagnates without the impulse of the individual. The impulse dies away without
the sympathy of the community.
-- William James Love is stronger than justice.
-- Sting All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
-- Charlie Chaplin "I don't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones." (John Cage) "To make the individual uncomfortable, that is my task." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Education "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear." (Ambrose Redmoon) "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. Many worthwile careers in the
street-cleansing, fruit-picking and subway-guitar-playing industries have been founded on a lack
of u Education
"The only way to have friends is to be one." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at
the same time.
- Robin Williams, commenting on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair "Fear is a darkroom where negatives develop." (Usman Asif) Why bother with marriage? Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house. "It is neccessary to have wished for death in order to know how good it is to live." (Alexander Dumas) Education Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset It was the greatest of the imperfect ventriloquist acts: when his lips moved, her body sang.
-- Tom Robbins Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your position falls, your ego goes with
it.
-- Colin Powell Education
You have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth
without producing it.
-- George Bernard Shaw You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or
play.
-- WARREN BEATTY We haven't the money, so we've got to think.
-- Lord Rutherford If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
-- Johnny Carson Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress.
-- Gandhi Education Soul meets soul on lovers lips.
-- Percy Bysshe Shelley "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships." (Sharon Stone) "The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances." (Viktor E. Frankl) Education
"Better to be deprived of food for three days than tea for one." (Chinese Proverb) "I am interested in anything about revolt, disorder , chaos--especially activity that seems to have no meaning. It seems to me to be the road toward freedom ... Rather than starting inside, I start ou Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a
brand new ending.
-- Anonymous "Does wisdom perhaps appear on the earth as a raven which is inspired by the smell of carrion?" (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage.
-- Will Rogers Education blah "Some of the worlds greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible. unattributed" (Anonymous) I feel that if a person has problems communicating the very least he can do is to shut up.
-- Tom Lehrer "For others do I wait ... for higher ones, stronger ones, more triumphant ones, merrier ones, for such as are built squarely in body and soul: laughing lions must come." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Education
Nobody ever died of laughter.
-- Max Beerbohm Friends need not agree in everything or go always together, or have no comparable other
friendships of the same intimacy. On the contrary, in friendship union is more about ideal things:
and in that .. I am indebted to the cat for a particular kind of honorable deceit, for a greater control over
myself, for a characteristic aversion to brutal sounds, and for the need to keep silent for long
per All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
- Ambrose Bierce A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.
-- Edgar Watson Howe Education Honorable, adj. Afflicted with an impediment in one's reach. In legislative bodies, it is customary
to mention all members as honorable; as, ``the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur.'
-- Bierce, A "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins.
-- Heywood Brown Education
Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.
-- Harriet Beecher Stowe What's another word for "Thesaurus?"
-- Steven Wright "Fake is as old as the Eden tree." (George Orson Welles) Shotgun wedding: a case of wife or death The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal consistency of the women who
love me.
-- George Bernard Shaw Education Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on
a date.
-- Caroline Rhea Politics have no relation to morals.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Education
Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
-- Helen Keller I have read your book and much like it.
-- Moses Hadas, book reviewer Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
-- Colin Greene Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large
organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.
-- Dave Barry I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
-- Fran Lebowitz Education "Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies." (Gore Vidal) Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy "Defeat the fear of death and welcome the death of fear." (G. Gordon Liddy) Education
I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with naked fat
people.
-- Ed Bluestone Good hours, excellent pay, fun place to work, paid training, mean boss. Oh well, four out of five
isn't bad.
-- Help Wanted Ad, PA newspaper, 1994 Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing
popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.
-- Dave Barry You've no idea of what a poor opinion I have of myself, and how little I deserve it.
-- W.S. Gilbert We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.
- Vince Lombardi Education My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm lucky to have them. "The meeting of two personalites is like the contact of two chemical substances. If there is any reaction, both are transformed." (Carl Gustav Jung) "By seeing the seed of failure in every success, we remain humble. By seeing the seed of success in every failure we remain hopeful." (Mel Ziegler, founder of Banana Republic) Education
As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy.
-- Abraham Lincoln That's the way things come clear. All of a sudden. And then you realize how obvious they've been
all along.
-- Madeleine L'Engle I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is; I only know that people call
me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat.
-- Rebecca West, The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because
generally they are the same people.
-- G. K. Chesterton The church is the great lost and found department.
-- Robert Short Education "Politics is my hobby. Smut is my vocation." (Larry Flynt) A new idea is delicate. It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn; it can be stabbed to death by a joke
or worried to death by a frown on the right person's brow.
-- Charles Brower The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free. Education
