Knowhere Guide to Chorlton - Informal information supplied by locals. With links to a noticeboard facility.
Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th Any sufficiently advanced bureaucracy is indistinguishable from molasses.
-- Anon. Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for
appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George bernard Shaw Let him who would enjoy a good future waste none of his present.
-- Roger Babson Guides and Directories "The act of policing is, in order to punish less often, to punish more severely." (Napoleon Bonaparte) If you are afraid of loneliness, do not marry. -- Chekhov "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) Guides and Directories
Love is an attempt to change a piece of the dream-world into reality.
-- Theodor Reik Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.
- Martin Fraquhar Tupper "Workers of the world unite; you have nothing to lose but your chains." (Karl Marx) The charm of history and its enigmatic lesson consist in the fact that, from age to age, nothing
changes and yet everything is completely different.
-- Aldous Huxley In matrimony, to hesitate is sometimes to be saved.
-- Samuel Butler Guides and Directories If we let people see that kind of thing, there would never again be any war.
-- Pentagon official, on why US military censored graphic footage from the Gulf War Marriage is the sole cause of divorce. Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon
compounds that crawl.
-- Mike Adams Guides and Directories
You have to kiss a lot of toads before you find a handsome prince.
-- American Proverb Anything too stupid to be said, is sung.
-- Voltaire Any sufficiently advanced bureaucracy is indistinguishable from molasses.
-- Anon. You can observe a lot by watching.
-- Yogi Berra The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved.
-- Mother Teresa Guides and Directories In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty.
-- Christopher Morley And in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make.
-- The Beatles, The last lyric of their last song When making public policy decisions about new technologies for the Government, I think one
should ask oneself which technologies would best strengthen the hand of a police state. Then, do
not allow Guides and Directories
Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance.
-- King George V The mind has exactly the same power as the hands: not merely to grasp the world, but to change
it.
-- Colin Wilson When a girl marries she exchanges the attention of many men for the inattention of one.
-- Helen Rowland I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
-- W. C. Fields Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches.
- the Duchess of Windsor, when asked what is the secret of a long and happy life Guides and Directories Nobody ever died of laughter.
-- Max Beerbohm "I love to doubt as well as know." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) "Guard with jealous attention the public liberty. Suspect every one who approaches that jewel. Unfortunately, nothing will preserve it but downright force. Whenever you give up that force, you are ine Guides and Directories
I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way
around Chinatown.
-- Woody Allen Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to
us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
-- Jeff Raskin Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity. It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
-- Oscar Wilde "Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at close of day. Rage, rage against the dying of the light." (Dylan Thomas) Guides and Directories They think they can make fuel from horse manure.... Now, I don't know if your car will be able to
get 30 miles to the gallon, but it's sure gonna put a stop to siphoning.
-- Billie Holliday Love is the delusion that one man or woman differs from another.
-- H. L. Mencken Adolescence is a period of rapid changes. Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent
ages as much as 20 years.
-- Anonymous Guides and Directories
LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the
influences under which he incurred the disorder... It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the
physician When I can no longer bear to think of the victims of broken homes, I begin to think of the victims
of intact ones.
-- Peter DeVries We see the brightness of a new page where everything yet can happen.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Book of Hours "It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so." (Mark Twain) If God does not exist, then everything is permitted.
-- Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Devils Guides and Directories "Careful?! Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a coat hanger while I was still in the womb?" (Trey Parker) Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.
-- Emily Dickinson He who limps is still walking.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec Guides and Directories
"As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Sleep is an excellent way of listening to an opera.
- James Stephens If you want a place in the sun, you've got to put up with a few blisters.
-- Abigail Van Buren If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one.
-- Mother Teresa Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
- Gail Godwin Guides and Directories I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage.
-- Will Rogers A man can do what he wants, but not want what he wants.
-- Arthur Schoperhauer The most savage controversies are about those matters as to which there is no good evidence
either way.
-- Bertrand Russell Guides and Directories
"I've just had eighteen straight whiskies. I think that's the record." (Dylan Thomas, final words) Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three
children and no theories.
-- John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester Black holes are where God divided by zero.
- Steven Wright A conclusion is the place where you got tired thinking.
-- Martin H. Fischer Giving a man space is like giving a dog a computer: the chances are he will not use it wisely.
-- Bette-Jane Raphael Guides and Directories You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone.
-- John Ciardi "In large states public education will always be mediocre, for the same reason that in large kitchens the cooking is usually bad." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The philosophy exam was a piece of cake -- which was a bit of a surprise, actually, because I
was expecting some questions on a sheet of paper.
-- Smith & Jones Guides and Directories
"A man who tells lies, like me, merely hides the truth. But a man who tells half-lies has forgotten where he put it." (Claude Rains, as Mr. Dryden, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) "Transport of the mails, transport of the human voice, transport of flickering pictures--in this century as in others our highest accomplishments still have the single aim of bringing men together." I have a great diet. You're allowed to eat anything you want, but you must eat it with naked fat
people.
-- Ed Bluestone The nation's honor is dearer than the nation's comfort; yes, than the nation's life itself.
-- Woodrow Wilson All television is children's television.
-- Richard P. Adler Guides and Directories Say goodbye to the oldies, but goodies, because the good old days weren't always good and
tomorrow aint as bad as it seems.
-- Billy Joel Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we learn. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of
fear and prejudices and the acceptance of love back in our hearts. Love is the essential reality
and I base my fashion sense on what doesn't itch.
-- Gilda Radner Guides and Directories
Soul meets soul on lovers lips.
-- Percy Bysshe Shelley When Baby's cries grew hard to bear I popped him in the Frigidaire. I never would have done so if
I'd known that he'd be frozen stiff. My wife said, "George, I'm so unhappy! Our darling's now
comple Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we learn. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of
fear and prejudices and the acceptance of love back in our hearts. Love is the essential reality
and If someone had told me I would be Pope one day, I would have studied harder.
-- Pope John Paul I "A new baby is like the beginning of all things--wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities." (Eda J. Le Shan) Guides and Directories Technology makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except over technology.
-- John Tudor I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked
me in the cellar.
-- Anonymous If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
-- Voltaire Guides and Directories
"This is the first age that's paid much attention to the future, which is a little ironic since we may not have one." (Arthur C. Clarke) "Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something." (Plato, 427 BC-348) The mathematician lives long and lives young; the wings of his soul do not early drop off, nor do
its pores become clogged with the earthy particles blown from the dusty highways of vulgar life.
-- The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it.
-- Jackie Gleason I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put
over my kitchen table.
-- Rodney Dangerfield Guides and Directories Giving a man space is like giving a dog a computer: the chances are he will not use it wisely.
-- Bette-Jane Raphael "I hear, I know. I see, I remember. I do, I understand." (Confucius, 551 BC-479) "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g Guides and Directories
