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Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday
afternoon.
-- Susan Ertz Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
-- George Santayana A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
- Sir Winston Churchill If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It's the worry
that gets you, not the loss of sleep.
-- Dale Carnegie Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of
genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius.
-- Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart Guides and Directories A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
-- Michel de Montaigne Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Before I married, I had three theories about raising children and no children. Now, I have three
children and no theories.
-- John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester Guides and Directories
"A thing of beauty is a joy forever." (John Keats) Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
- Jean-Paul Sartre Shotgun wedding: a case of wife or death What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
-- Woody Allen "If you light a man a fire, he will be warm for a day; if you light a man on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life." (Anonymous) Guides and Directories The days just before marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book. He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
- Abraham Lincoln If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.
-- Anne Bradstreet Guides and Directories
The real questions are the ones that obtrude upon your consciousness whether you like it or not,
the ones that make your mind start vibrating like a jackhammer, the ones that you 'come to terms
with The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
-- General George Patton One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is
terribly important.
-- Bertrand Russell Oregon Democratic Senate candidate Tom Bruggere, in describing his support for
comprehensive health care during a candidates' forum, said he supported "erection-to-
resurrection" coverage. He later a "I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in grammar." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Guides and Directories The second half of a man's life is made up of nothing but the habits he has acquired during the
first half.
Fyodor Dostoevsky (1821 - 1881) He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
-- Anonymous In a cat's eyes, all things belong to cats.
-- English Proverb Guides and Directories
"Wise men learn more from fools, than fools from the wise." (Anonymous) Ah, well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
-- Oscar Wilde, dying words The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain
terrible.
-- Jean Kerr The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. -- Groucho Marx Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
-- John Lehman, Secretary of the Navy, 1981-1987 Guides and Directories Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?
-- Virginia Woolf God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at
the same time.
- Robin Williams, commenting on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of
sin.
-- John Von Neuman Guides and Directories
"The monster a child knows best and is most concerned with [is] the monster he feels or fears himself to be. " (Bruno Bettelheim, child psychologist) I think 'Hail to the Chief' has a nice ring to it.
- John F. Kennedy when asked what is his favorite song The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
- Samuel Johnson blah "Sometimes it is said that man cannot be trusted with the government of himself. Can he, then be trusted with the government of others? Or have we found angels in the form of kings to govern him? Women: If they're not turning down your proposals for marriage, they're accusing you of
suspicious behavior in the women's lingerie changing room.
-- Cliff Clavin, character on "Cheers", U.S. Televi Guides and Directories There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the
instrument plays itself.
-- Johann Sebastian Bach I am become death, shatterer of worlds.
-- Robert J. Oppenheimer, citing from the Bhagavadgita, after witnessing the world's first nuclear
explosion My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
-- Christopher Morley Guides and Directories
Acting is the most minor of gifts and not a very high-class way to earn a living. After all, Shirley
Temple could do it at the age of four.
-- Katharine Hepburn This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises,
promotions, and other signs of appreciation.
-- Anonymous In the early sixties, we were strong, we were virulent...
-- John Connally, Secretary of Treasury under Richard Nixon, in an early 70s speech, as reported
in a contemporary "American Scholar" "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread." (Alexander Pope) Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo... Guides and Directories "The order of the world is always right - such is the judgment of God. For God has departed, but he has left his judgment behind, the way the Cheshire Cat left his grin." (Jean Baudrillard) He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
- Abraham Lincoln Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of
hers.
-- Anonymous Guides and Directories
In all recorded history there has not been one economist who has had to worry about where the
next meal would come from.
-- Peter F. Drucker Everything that can be invented has been invented.
- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899 Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
-- Anonymous "The dancer's body is simply the luminous manifestation of the soul." (Isadora Duncan) "The order of the world is always right - such is the judgment of God. For God has departed, but he has left his judgment behind, the way the Cheshire Cat left his grin." (Jean Baudrillard) Guides and Directories The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
-- Mark Twain "To err is human; to forgive, divine." (Alexander Pope) I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.... This is an ex-parrot.
-- John Cleese, Monty Python, British comedy television show Guides and Directories
Education is not filling a bucket, but lighting a fire.
-- William Yeats The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
- Von Clausewitz There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.
-- Steven Wright If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.
-- Marcus Aurelius It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims.
- Aristotle Guides and Directories The paradox is really the pathos of intellectual life and just as only great souls are exposed to
passions it is only the great thinker who is exposed to what I call paradoxes, which are . . .
grand "Be the change that you want to see in the world." (Mohandas Gandhi) Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony.
-- Oliver Herford Guides and Directories
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
- Henry Ford I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how
to make it interesting.
-- Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hal It is better to die on your feet than live on your knees.
-- Emiliano Zapata Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
-- Charles Schultz No woman marries for money; they are all clever enough, before marrying a millionaire, to fall in
love with him first.
-- Cesare Pavese Guides and Directories Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.
-- Hector Louis Berlioz With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.
-- Abraham Lincoln While we are postponing, life speeds by.
- Seneca (3BC - 65AD) Guides and Directories
The soul is healed by being with children.
-- Fyodor Dostoyevski It is always right that a man should be able to render a reason for the faith that is within him.
-- Sydney Smith "All our best men are laughed at in this nightmare land." (Jack Keroac) "Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance it accumulates in the form of inert facts." (Henry B. Adams) Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way
around the laws.
- Plato Guides and Directories "A man who flies from his fear may find he has only taken a shortcut to meet it." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first.
-- Billy Sunday Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais Guides and Directories
"We have to be able to criticise what we love, to say what we have to say 'cause if your not trying to make something better, than as far as I can tell, you are just in the way." (Ani Difranco) The greatest homage to truth is to use it.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson She felt in italics and thought in capitals.
-- Henry James The possibility that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause
we believe to be just.
-- Abraham Lincoln You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax--tomorrow you'll be afraid to
cough.
-- Pearl Williams Guides and Directories The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would not be caught dead in otherwise.
-- Roger Simon Can you imagine what I would do if I could do all I can?
-- The Artist Formerly Known As Prince History repeats itself; that's one of the things that's wrong with history.
-- Clarence Darrow Guides and Directories
