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If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them
missionaries for dinner.
-- H. L. Mencken He who has lost honor can lose nothing more.
-- Publilius Syrus We can do no great things; only small things with great love.
-- Mother Teresa Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
- Saint Augustine He who knows nothing, knows nothing. But he who knows he knows nothing knows something. And he who knows someone whose friend's wife's brother knows nothing, he knows something. Or something like that Transport "The only things worth learning are the things you learn after you know it all." (Harry S. Truman) Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not
there, I go to work.
- Robert Orben There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
-- Will Rogers Transport
The unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the
bad ones.
-- W. Somerset Maugham "College professors are the people who can't hack it in the real world." (William Thomas) Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
- Voltaire (1694-1778) on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan. The lover knows much more about absolute good and universal beauty than any logician or
theologian, unless the latter, too, be lovers in disguise.
-- George Santayana "Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences." (Isadora Duncan) Transport Beware you be not swallowed up in books! An ounce of love is worth a pound of knowledge.
-- John Wesley The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to
heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need
more supervision.
-- Lynn Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.
-- Oscar Wilde Transport
blah "A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) "Talent does what it can; genius does what it must." (Edward Robert Bulwer-Lytton) History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
-- Winston Churchill The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is
that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one.
-- Anonymous The imaginary friends I had as a kid dropped me because their friends thought I didn't exist.
-- Aaron Machado Transport The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and
science.
-- Albert Einstein Weaseling out of things is good. It's what separates us from the other animals....except weasels.
-- Homer Simpson, character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show And now, in keeping with Channel 40's policy of always bringing you the latest in blood and guts,
in living color, you're about to see another first -- an attempted suicide.
-- Chris Hubbock, who sh Transport
Art and science have their meeting point in method.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.
-- Robert Frost Parents are the bones upon which children sharpen their teeth.
-- Peter Ustinov God help the man who won't marry until he finds a perfect woman, and God help him still more if
he finds her.
-- Benjamin Tillett I must follow the people. Am I not their leader?
-- Benjamin Disraeli Transport "This is slavery, not to speak one's thought." (Euripides) Hardly a year passes that fails to find a new, oft-times exotic, research method or technique
added to the armamentarium of political inquiry. Anyone who cannot negotiate Chi squares,
assess randomi One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do
what he was afraid he couldn't do.
-- Henry Ford Transport
"Do you know that places only yield up their secrets, their most profound mysteries, to those who are just passing through?" (Salman Rushdie, The Moor's Last Sigh) Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft...and the only one that can be mass
produced with unskilled labor.
-- Wernher von Braun "One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries." (A. A. Milne) I want to die in my sleep like my friend.... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his
car.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker What is the answer? In that case, what is the question?
-- Gertrude Stein, dying words Transport Trust, but verify.
-- Ronald Reagan Husbands are like fires. They go out if unattended.
-- Zsa Zsa Gabor For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.
-- Clifton Fadiman Transport
My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, And so made sure that she would stay, In better spirits night and day. Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress.
-- Anonymous Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and
cautious, but because it has been playful, rebellious, and immature.
-- Tom Robbins "Brevity is the soul of wit." (William Shakespeare) Sign in a marriage counselor's window: "Out to lunch - Think it over." Transport That is the best -- to laugh with someone because you think the same things are funny.
-- Gloria Vanderbilt "The last Christian died on the cross." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with
typewriters.
- Frank Lloyd Wright Transport
The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely the one who dropped it.
-- Lou Holtz blah "It is a grand mistake to think of being great without goodness and I pronounce it as certain that there was never a truly great man that was not at the same time truly virtuous." (Benjamin Fran Wit is educated insolence.
- Aristotle The gods too are fond of a joke.
-- Aristotle And I shall love thee still my dear, Until my wife is wise. Transport Dreams never hurt anybody if you keep working right behind the dreams to make as much of
them become real as you can.
-- Frank W. Woolworth Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You'd see a flock of birds come by, laughing hysterically!
-- Steven Wright Women are the only exploited group in history to have been idealized into powerlessness.
-- Erica Jong Transport
If I tell a lie it's only because I think I'm telling the truth.
-- Phil Gaglardi, Minister of Highways, British Columbia, Canada True friendship can afford true knowledge. It does not depend on darkness and ignorance.
-- Henry David Thoreau "Club Secretary: I say, Lawrence. You are a clown!
Lawrence: We can't all be lion tamers." (Thomas Edward Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) Work is the curse of the drinking class.
-- Oscar Wilde Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
-- Anonymous Transport In the end, everything is a gag.
- Charlie Chaplin "Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh." (George Bernard Shaw) Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise.
-- Samuel Johnson Transport
Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West "The sickness of our times for me has been just this damn thing that everything has been getting smaller and smaller and less and less important, that the romantic spirit has dried up, that there is n I think of my wife and I think of Lot, and I think of the lucky break he got. "There are no uninteresting things, only uninteresting people." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) Transport The better part of valor is discretion.
-- William Shakespeare 1564-1616 from King Henry the Fourth, Part I Do or do not. There is no try.
-- Yoda, character in the movie The Empire Strikes Back Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Transport
A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
-- Walter Winchell The empires of the future are the empires of the mind.
-- Winston Churchill I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.
- Steven Wright Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
-- Mark Twain Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
-- Anonymous Transport The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
-- Clarence Darrow And gain is gain, however small.
-- Robert Browning 2,400,000 Americans play the accordian - hopefully not at the same time.
-- inside of a Pepsi cap Transport
There's no problem so awful that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse!
-- Calvin He didn't say that. He was reading what was given to him in a speech.
-- Richard Darman, director of OMB, explaining why President Bush wasn't following up on his
campaign pledge that there would be "To avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, be nothing." (Elbert Hubbard, American author, 1856-1915) It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
- Oscar Wilde If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.
-- Virginia Woolf Transport She felt in italics and thought in capitals.
-- Henry James We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.
-- George Bernard Shaw The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
- Emile Zola Transport
