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Now is the time for all good men to come to.
-- Walt Kelly Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to.
-- Shane Leslie The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
-- ee cummings In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence. Therefore:
? In time, every post tends to be occupied by an employee who is incompetent to carry out its
duties.
? Work When yer in a funk, people in love are a royal pain in the patookus.
-- Portnoy, character in "Outland," comic strip by Berkely Breathed Accommodation The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted
in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism.
-- Heidi Hartmann, The Unha I am in total control, but don't tell my wife. The democratic theory is that if you accumulate enough ignorance at the polls, you produce
intelligence.
-- Philo Vance Accommodation
It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.
-- Abraham Lincoln Nothing is really work unless you would rather be doing something else.
-- James Matthew Barrie I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't.
-- Jules Renard "You can get help from teachers, but you are going to have to learn a lot by yourself, sitting alone in a room." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, On becoming a writer, NY Times 21 "Every great institution is the lengthened shadow of a single man. His character determines the character of the organization." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Accommodation Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.
-- Rose Franken Great innovations should not be forced on slender majorities.
-- Thomas Jefferson Dishonor will not trouble me, once I am dead.
-- Euripides Accommodation
He who receives an idea from me receives instruction for himself without lessening mine; as he
who lights his taper at mine receives light without darkening me.
-- Thomas Jefferson The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
- Niels Bohr 2,400,000 Americans play the accordian - hopefully not at the same time.
-- inside of a Pepsi cap Live your questions now, and perhaps even without knowing it, you will live along some distant
day into your answers.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke "Club Secretary: I say, Lawrence. You are a clown!
Lawrence: We can't all be lion tamers." (Thomas Edward Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia, 1962) Accommodation I drink no more than a sponge.
-- Francis Rabelais, Works. Book i. Chap. v. Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars
-- Les Brown Only the little people pay taxes.
-- Leona Helmsley, hotel owner and prison inmate, 1989 Accommodation
"Courageous, untroubled, mocking and violent--that is what Wisdom wants us to be. Wisdom is a woman, and loves only a warrior." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-- Albert Einstein Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute. If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get
married.
-- Katharine Hepburn I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University Accommodation Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
- Karl Wallenda A man in the house is worth two in the street.
-- Mae West America's one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.
-- Bobcat Goldthwait Accommodation
Life is not an easy matter.... You cannot live through it without falling into frustration and cynicism
unless you have before you a great idea which raises you above personal misery, above
weakness The gods gave man fire and he invented fire engines. They gave him love and he invented marriage. I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
-- Thomas Edison The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
-- George Bernard Shaw Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours.
-- Benjamin Disraeli Accommodation Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business.
-- Tom Robbins "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) Truth can be a dangerous thing. It is quite patient and relentless.
-- R. Scott Richards Accommodation
The authority of those who teach is often an obstacle to those who want to learn.
-- Cicero "Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What?! You too! Thought I was the only one.'" (Clive Staples Lewis) Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure.
- Ross MacDonald Our marriage would have worked if we hadn't lived together.
-- Joan Thompson Laundry increases exponentially in the number of children.
-- Miriam Robbins Accommodation Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
-- Karl Wallenda A man has to live with himself, and he should see to it that he always has good company.
-- Charles Evans Hughes He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.
-- Bertolt Brecht Accommodation
Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
-- T.S. Eliot "Crime like death is not confined to the old and withered alone. The youngest and fairest are too often its chosen victims." (Charles Dickens, 1812-70, Oliver Twist) Two souls with but a single thought,
Two hearts that beat as one.
-- Fredrich Halm Oregon Democratic Senate candidate Tom Bruggere, in describing his support for
comprehensive health care during a candidates' forum, said he supported "erection-to-
resurrection" coverage. He later a Always talk to your wife while you're making love... if there's a phone handy. Accommodation "When I was four years old they tried to test my IQ, they showed me this picture of three oranges and a pear. They asked me which one is different and does not belong, they taught me different was wro Assassins!
-- Arturo Toscanini, to his orchestra When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. -- Guitry Accommodation
This search for what you want is like tracking something that doesn't want to be tracked. It takes
time to get a dance right, to create something memorable.
-- Fred Astaire "If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z, X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut." (Albert Einstein) Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. A small family is soon provided for.
-- English Proverb "The most instructive experiences are those of everyday life." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Accommodation The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and
remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't
work and the The great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are going.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes "I've just had eighteen straight whiskies. I think that's the record." (Dylan Thomas, final words) Accommodation
Choose a wife by your ear than your eye.
-- Thomas Fuller, 1732 "Growth in wisdom can be measured precisely by decline in bile." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human) "In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be
feasible.
- A Yale University management professor in response to student Fred Smith's paper prop It is not good enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well.
-- Rene Descartes Accommodation "Better is the enemy of good." (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire, 1694-1778) Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
-- Scott Adams, The Dilbert Principle 2,400,000 Americans play the accordian - hopefully not at the same time.
-- inside of a Pepsi cap Accommodation
Sir, I would rather be right than be President.
-- Henry Clay, Speech, 1850, referring to the Compromise Measure "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) A friend is a gift you give yourself.
-- Robert Louis Stevenson "I run to see who has the most guts." (Steve Roland Prefontaine) Property may be destroyed and money may lose its purchasing power; but, character, health,
knowledge and good judgement will always be in demand under all conditions.
-- Roger Babson Accommodation Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise.
-- Samuel Johnson Truth often suffers more by the heat of its defenders than the arguments of its opposers.
-- William Penn If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams Accommodation
Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt.
-- Jose Ortega y Gasset Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
-- Gail Godwin I love cats because I love my home and after a while they become its visible soul.
-- Jean Cocteau Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
- Irving Kristol Accommodation I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. we are for the most part
more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers.
-- Thoreau "Great indebtedness does not make men grateful, but vengeful; and if a little charity is not forgotten, it turns into a gnawing worm." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Thus Spake Zarathustra) A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
-- John Ciardi Accommodation
