Watching the debate this afternoon it was apparent they loved term limits in the House -- as
Brutus loved Caesar.
-- Bill Moyers In marriage, the bridge gets a shower. But for the groom, it's curtains! Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too.
-- H. L. Mencken If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.
-- Alphonse Karr "Pay no attention to what the critics say; there has never been set up a statue in honor of a critic." (Jean Sibelius) Computers and Internet There is nothing more notable in Socrates than that he found time, when he was an old man, to
learn music and dancing, and thought it time well spent.
-- Michel de Montaigne "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
-- Henry Kissinger Computers and Internet
We have drugs to make women speak, but none to keep them silent.
-- Anatole France The imaginary friends I had as a kid dropped me because their friends thought I didn't exist.
-- Aaron Machado A friend is a gift you give yourself.
-- Robert Louis Stevenson "Conform and be dull." (J. Frank Doble) Don't trust anyone over 30 who used to say "Don't trust anyone over 30."
-- Anonymous Computers and Internet The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault.
- Henry Kissinger Where there is marriage without love, there will be love without marriage.
-- Benjamin Franklin I have lost friends, some by death, others through sheer inability to cross the street.
-- Virginia Woolf Computers and Internet
The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.
-- Franklin D. Roosevelt "I would rather die standing than live on my knees!" (Emiliano Zapata) And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly,
what is essential is invisible to the eye.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupery An act of love that fails is just as much a part of the divine life as an act of love that succeeds, for
love is measured by fullness, not by reception.
-- Harold Loukes I have always dressed according to certain Basic Guy Fashion Rules, including:
* Both of your socks should always be the same color
* Or they should at least both be fairly dark
-- Dave Barry Computers and Internet Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.
-- Oscar Wilde An economic forecaster is like a cross-eyed javelin thrower: they don't win many accuracy
contests, but they keep the crowd's attention.
-- Anonymous "One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Computers and Internet
Never judge a book by its movie.
-- J. W. Eagan May your wife be a witch who takes after her mother, and may you all live together in a one-room house. A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one.
-- Kin Hubbard Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.
-- Chinese Proverb "The most instructive experiences are those of everyday life." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Computers and Internet If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.
- J. Paul Getty "Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking." (H. Jackson Brown (Jr.) Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is
merely a good excuse not to play football.
-- Fran Lebowitz Computers and Internet
If you don't double-click me, I can't do anything.
-- John Aniston, on how computers have taken over his life I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.
-- Francois-Auguste Rodin, when asked how he managed to make his remarkable statues If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile.
-- Lynda Barry Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
-- George Clemenceau Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
-- Mae West Computers and Internet A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
-- Michel de Montaigne "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to take it off of you." (Francois Sagan) "Those who feel certainty are stupid and those with any imagination or understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Computers and Internet
The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
- Lucille S. Harper The paradox is really the pathos of intellectual life and just as only great souls are exposed to
passions it is only the great thinker who is exposed to what I call paradoxes, which are . . .
grand There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as
though everything is a miracle.
-- Albert Einstein Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner I married beneath me. All women do.
-- Lady Nancy Astor, attributed Computers and Internet "What is tolerance? -- it is the consequence of humanity. We are all formed of frailty and error; let us pardon reciprocally each other's folly -- that is the first law of nature." (Francois Marie Ar The mind has exactly the same power as the hands: not merely to grasp the world, but to change
it.
-- Colin Wilson The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
- Niels Bohr Computers and Internet
Most people are more comfortable with old problems than with new solutions.
-- Anonymous In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update
would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every
computer that th Weaseling out of things is good. It's what separates us from the other animals....except weasels.
-- Homer Simpson, character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show My mother-in-law broke up my marriage. My wife came home from work one day and found me in
bed with her.
-- Lenny Bruce "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) Computers and Internet Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i "Murderers have been known to find that young girls give them more trouble than anybody else." (Jean Cocteau, Les Enfants Terribles) Every major horror of history was committed in the name of an altruistic motive.
-- Ayn Rand Computers and Internet
A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
-- Albert Einstein The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of
mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
-- Rita Mae Brown blah "If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves." (Thomas Alva Edison) Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you
have to do, when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not.
-- Aldous Huxley Computers and Internet "Paper should be edible, nutritious. Inks used for printing or writing should have delicious flavors. Magazines or newspapers read at breakfast should be eaten for lunch. Instead of throwing one's mai Marriage is a rest period between romances. "Genius without education is like silver in the mine." (Benjamin Franklin) Computers and Internet
No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman.
-- Honore de Balzac Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater.
-- Albert Einstein Shotgun wedding: a case of wife or death Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark
in one another.
-- Kenny Ausubel Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same
direction.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry Computers and Internet When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his
cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that
Uncl I hate it in friends when they come too late to help.
-- Euripides Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes Computers and Internet
Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. Many worthwile careers in the
street-cleansing, fruit-picking and subway-guitar-playing industries have been founded on a lack
of u The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.
-- Kin Hubbard For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
-- Virginia Woolf Intelligence has nothing to do with politics.
-- Londo Molari Usenet is like Tetris for people who still remember how to read.
-- Button from the Computer Museum, Boston, MA Computers and Internet It was the greatest of the imperfect ventriloquist acts: when his lips moved, her body sang.
-- Tom Robbins blah "Each friend represents a world in us; a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only in meeting them that a new world is born." (Anais Nin) My father was a minister. I had to make up for the lack of sin.
-- Milwuakee mayor, on why he became a politician Computers and Internet
"As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i It is no use walking anywhere to preach unless our walking is our preaching.
-- St. Francis of Assisi Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
- Henry David Thoreau "Don't let your ego get too close to your position, so that if your position gets shot down, your ego doesn't go with it." (Colin Powell) Computers and Internet "If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) When looking back, usually I'm more sorry for the things I didn't do than for the things I shouldn't
have done.
-- Malcolm Forbes "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free." (Emma Lazarus) Computers and Internet
