Craven Pothole Club - Based in the Craven area of North Yorkshire with HQ at Ivy Cottage, Horton-in-Ribblesdale.
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
-- Erma Bombeck Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open.
-- Thomas Dewar "Even a stopped clock is right twice a day." (Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach) Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson It is with true love as it is with ghosts; everyone talks about it, but few have seen it.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld Horton-in-Ribblesdale "The concerned investment banker is the one who blows the horn on his Mercedes as he drives through a red light." (Anonymous) Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and
illiterate sport fishermen.
-- P. J. O'Rourke May you live happily ever after with a poor, ugly, shrewish wife. Horton-in-Ribblesdale
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100-foot clipper.
-- Unknown history student Knowledge is the intellectual manipulation of carefully verified observations.
-- Sigmund Freud Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-
Box.
-- Wil Shriner Democracy is a form of government in which it is permitted to wonder aloud what the country
could do under first-class management.
-- Senator Soaper Horton-in-Ribblesdale If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded.
-- Maya Angelou Value your words. Each one may be the last.
-- Stanislaw J. Lec When you don't know that you don't know, it's a lot different than when you do know that you
don't know. He knows now that he doesn't know. Last year, he didn't know that.
-- Bill Parcels, New Engla Horton-in-Ribblesdale
We got to roll with the punches, play all of our hunches, make the best of whatever comes your
way. Forget that blind ambition, learn to trust your intuition -- plowing straight ahead, come what
may Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same
thing nowadays.
-- Oscar Wilde There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of
bread.
- Mahatma Gandhi Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
-- Woody Allen That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the
lessons that history has to teach.
-- Aldous Huxley Horton-in-Ribblesdale I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about 'short' and 'cheap'? -- Phyllis Diller Realism is a corruption of reality.
-- Wallace Stevens Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get
money from it.
-- Stephen Leacock Horton-in-Ribblesdale
When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find
that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our
pain "If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there is an instinct for freedom, there are opportunities to change things, there's a chance for you t If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be called research, would it?
-- Albert Einstein Time is at once the most valuable and most perishable of all our possessions.
-- John Randolph Experience is the name every one gives his mistakes.
-- Elbert Hubbard Horton-in-Ribblesdale It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel.
-- Robert Frost No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. -- Honore de Balzac Horton-in-Ribblesdale
blah "A subject for a great poet would be God's boredom after the seventh day of creation." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Giving a man space is like giving a dog a computer: the chances are he will not use it wisely.
-- Bette-Jane Raphael Hey, you can't fight in here! This is the war room!
-- Dr. Strangelove It depends on your definition of asleep. They were not stretched out. They had their eyes closed.
They were seated at their desks with their heads in a nodding position.
-- John Hogan, Commonwealth If all these sweet young things were laid end to end, I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised.
-- Dorothy Parker Horton-in-Ribblesdale It takes a great deal of history to produce a little literature.
-- Henry James It was just him and me. He fought with honor. If it weren't for his honor, he and the others would
have beaten me together. They might have killed me, then. His sense of honor saved my life. I
didn' Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.
-- Albert Camus Horton-in-Ribblesdale
"Mothers spend a lifetime excising from their sons the influence of their fathers." (Arthur Lotti) Don't bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than
yourself.
-- William Faulkner "It seems to me that there are two kinds of trickery: the 'fronts' people assume before one another's eyes, and the 'front' a writer puts on the face of reality." (Francois Sagan) The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is
not read.
-- Oscar Wilde "One pretty good definition of college is that it's a place where people are made to read difficult books." (Jonathan Franzen) Horton-in-Ribblesdale Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago .. I am indebted to the cat for a particular kind of honorable deceit, for a greater control over
myself, for a characteristic aversion to brutal sounds, and for the need to keep silent for long
per A hippo does not have a sting in its tail, but a wise man would still rather be sat on by a bee.
-- Polish proverb Horton-in-Ribblesdale
History is more or less bunk.
-- Henry Ford The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a
lot less.
-- Brendon Behan Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they translate into their own
language and forthwith it is something entirely different.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back.
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, g Horton-in-Ribblesdale If ever I get married again it would have to be under an anaesthetic.
-- Marie Tonkin The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.
-- Virginia Woolf "If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they don't want to hear." (George Orwell) Horton-in-Ribblesdale
There is a coherent plan in the universe, though I don't know what it's a plan for.
-- Fred Hoyle I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
-- Anonymous Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.
-- Samuel Goldwyn, immigrant-turned-famous-movie-producer, when told his son was getting
married "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." (Herbert Spencer) Horton-in-Ribblesdale Once all struggle is grasped, miracles are possible.
-- Mao Tse-tung You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler I think one of the reasons I'm popular again is because I'm wearing a tie. You have to be different.
-- Tony Bennett, 1995 Horton-in-Ribblesdale
Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine.
Sir Arthur Eddington (1882 - 1944) Trust everybody, but cut the cards.
-- Finley Peter Dunne "The brighter you are, the more you have to learn." (Don Herold) The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one
is.
-- Arnold Bennett The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.
-- George Bernard Shaw Horton-in-Ribblesdale blah "To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift." (Steve Roland Prefontaine) You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
-- Indira Gandhi Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking
campaign Horton-in-Ribblesdale
It is not good enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well.
-- Rene Descartes Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and through the nose of the
gentleman.
-- Herbert Spencer Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
-- George Bernard Shaw In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is
simply one of those things which happen from time to time.
-- Edward P. Tryon "The purpose of Compulsory Education is to deprive the common people of their commonsense." (Gilbert Keith Chesterton) Horton-in-Ribblesdale "I run to see who has the most guts." (Steve Roland Prefontaine) Let him who would enjoy a good future waste none of his present.
-- Roger Babson "All women love the men they fear. All women kiss the hand that rules them." (Lionel Atwill) Horton-in-Ribblesdale
A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him. -- Rich Little There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards - only physics a Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.
- Albert Giacometti (sculptor) The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.
-- Frank J. Dobie, A Texan in England, 1945 Horton-in-Ribblesdale "A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you." (Bert Leston Taylor) I am in total control, but don't tell my wife. Love is blind and marriage is the institution for the blind.
-- James Graham Horton-in-Ribblesdale
