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Whoever is not a misanthrope at forty can never have loved mankind.
-- Sebastian Roch Nicolas Chamfort To be or not to be isn't the question. The question is how to prolong being.
-- Tom Robbins "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world, indeed it is the only thing that ever has." (Margaret Mead, 1901-78) "Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few." (George Bernard Shaw) A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
- Helen Rowland News and Media It is dangerous for a national candidate to say things that people might remember.
-- Eugene McCarthy "Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Walk beside me and just be my friend." (Albert Camus) I skate to where the puck is going to be, not to where it has been.
-- Wayne Gretzky News and Media
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
-- Erma Bombeck There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
- Frank Zappa "I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in grammar." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Guys are lucky because they get to grow mustaches. I wish I could. It's like having a little pet for
your face.
-- Anita Wise The wit of a graduate student is like champagne. Canadian champagne.
-- Robertson Davies News and Media Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine.
Sir Arthur Eddington (1882 - 1944) Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.
-- Robert Frost "For others do I wait ... for higher ones, stronger ones, more triumphant ones, merrier ones, for such as are built squarely in body and soul: laughing lions must come." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) News and Media
"I love Los Angeles. I love Hollywood. They're beautiful. Everybody's plastic, but I love plastic. I want to be plastic." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) Man and wife make one fool. Never practice two vices at once.
-- Tallulah Bankhead Go away...I'm alright.
-- H. G. Wells, dying words The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning
it.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton News and Media Do you not know, my son, with what little understanding the world is ruled?
-- Pope Julius III Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him. -- Rich Little "One pretty good definition of college is that it's a place where people are made to read difficult books." (Jonathan Franzen) News and Media
"Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Walk beside me and just be my friend." (Albert Camus) Like a prune, you are not getting any better looking, but you are getting sweeter.
-- N. D. Stice This is the fourth?
-- Thomas Jefferson, dying words The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and
ethical infants.
-- General Omar Bradley I know I'm not in government anymore. In fact I'm out of work.
-- Ronald Reagan, Former U.S. President, on a speaking tour of Japan, 1989 News and Media I'm for abolishing and doing away with redundancy.
-- J. Curtis McKay, Wisconsin State Elections Board There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977 Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. News and Media
Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
-- T. S. Eliot For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the
purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
-- Anatole France When a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up
something appropriate and do it.
-- E. W. Howe Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
-- Anonymous News and Media Now comes the mystery.
-- Henry Ward Beecher, dying words, March 8, 1887 Statistics have shown that mortality increases perceptibly in the military during wartime.
-- Alphonse Allais You will marry into an Indian tribe and become one big Hopi family. News and Media
The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline
luggage.
-- Mark Russell Hope, like faith, is nothing if it is not courageous; it is nothing if it is not ridiculous.
-- Thornton Wilder The first clergyman was the first rascal who met the first fool.
-- Voltaire Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.
-- Oscar Wilde The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.
-- Jilly Cooper News and Media "If I work toward an end, meantime I am confined to a process. The rainbow is more beautiful than the pot at the end of it, because the rainbow is now. And the pot never turns out to be quite what I e I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President "True friends, like diamonds, are precious and rare. False friends, like autumn leaves, are found everywhere." (Anonymous) News and Media
Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Great eaters and great sleepers are incapable of anything else that is great.
-- William Shakespeare, Henry IV "How is it that we never have time to do a job right, but we always have time to do it over?" (Anonymous) To die for an idea is to set a rather high price on conjecture.
-- Anatole France "The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." (William Blake) News and Media In literature as in love, we are astonished at what is chosen by others.
-- André Maurois "Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." (Blaise Pascal) Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
-- Jackie Mason News and Media
We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is a false opinion; and if we
were sure, stifling it would be an evil still.
-- John Stuart Mill Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. "I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of the freedom of the people by gradual and silent encroachments of those in power than by violent and sudden usurpations." (James Madison) The wise see knowledge and action as one; they see truly.
-- Bhagava Gita To expect defeat is nine-tenths of defeat itself.
-- Francis Crawford News and Media The days just before marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book. "Twelve magicians and two carnies have been shot dead doing the bullet catch. That's cool enough, but every night when we close our show with that trick and the loaded gun gets pointed in my face, it "I put on an act sometimes, and people think I'm insensitive. Really, it's like a kind of armor because I'm too sensitive. If there are two hundred people in a room and one of them doesn't like me, I' News and Media
Grad school is the snooze button on the clock-radio of life.
-- John Rogers, comedian (who holds a graduate degree in physics) "Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains.The superior teacher demonstrates. The
great teacher inspires.
-- William Arthur Ward If a man is considered guilty for what goes on in his mind, give me the electric chair for all my
future crimes.
-- Prince "If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change." (John A. Simone Sr.) News and Media "When you have nothing to say, say nothing." (Charles Caleb Colton) He who conquers himself is the mightiest warrior.
-- Confucius I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.
- Steven Wright News and Media
There are three kinds of death in this world. There's heart death, there's brain death, and there's
being off the network.
-- Guy Almes When you're experimenting you have to try so many things before you choose what you want,
and you may go days getting nothing but exhaustion.
-- Fred Astaire Men are strong only so long as they represent a strong idea. They become powerless when they
oppose it.
-- Sigmund Freud Old soldiers never die, they just fade away.
-- General Douglas MacArthur Behind every great fortune there is a crime.
- Honore de Balzac News and Media "The perception of beauty is a moral test." (Henry David Thoreau) "Use what talents you possess; The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." (William Blake) Sleep is that golden chain that ties health and our bodies together.
-- Thomas Dekker News and Media
"I never resist temptation, because I have found that things that are bad for me do not tempt me." (George Bernard Shaw) An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her. -- Agatha Christie Truth must necessarily be stranger than fiction, for fiction is the creation of the human mind and
therefore congenial to it.
-- G. K. Chesterton Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an
automobile.
-- Billy Sunday "I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio." (Joan Rivers) News and Media "The face is the soul of the body." (Ludwig Wittgenstein) They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist---
-- John B. Sedgwick, general, dying words, 1864 "I had discovered that a person does not have to be this or be that or be anything, not even oneself. One is free." (Walker Percy, The Moviegoer) News and Media
