Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten.
-- Mark Twain If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams I like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.
-- Mae West Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.
-- Soren Kierkegaard Shropshire Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.
-- Irwin Corey I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up.
-- Barbara Bush, first lady, 1989 All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
- Ambrose Bierce Shropshire
"Death is always and under all circumstances a tragedy, for if it is not, then it means that life itself has become one." (Theodore Roosevelt) Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is.
-- Diane Ackerman He who laughs last thinks slowest.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker And gain is gain, however small.
-- Robert Browning Until the day of his death, no man can be sure of his courage.
-- Jean Anouilh Shropshire "Of all mankind the great poet is the equable man." (Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, 1855) Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Mature love says: "I need you because I
love you."
-- Erich Fromm That's the way things come clear. All of a sudden. And then you realize how obvious they've been
all along.
-- Madeleine L'Engle Shropshire
Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more
experiments you make the better. What if they are a little course, and you may get your coat
soiled or torn? The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.
- definition of happiness by John F. Kennedy To correct a natural indifference I was placed half-way between misery and the sun. Misery kept
me from believing that all was well under the sun, and the sun taught me that history wasn't
everythin Marriage: the only sport in which the trapped animal has to buy the license. Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of
opportunity.
-- George Bernard Shaw Shropshire "Humanity has won its battle. Liberty now has a country." (Marquis de Lafayette) Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any
antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.
-- Alfred Hitchcock The grand aim of all science is to cover the greatest number of empirical facts by logical
deduction from the smallest number of hypotheses or axioms.
-- Albert Einstein Shropshire
Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in
accordance with the dictates of reason.
-- Oscar Wilde If addiction is judged by how long a dumb animal will sit pressing a lever to get a 'fix' of
something, to its own detriment, then I would conclude that netnews is far more addictive than
cocaine.
Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility.
-- Dietrich Bonhoeffer If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith.
-- Albert Einstein Those parts of the system that you can hit with a hammer (not advised) are called hardware;
those program instructions that you can only curse at are called software.
-- Unknown author, Levitating T Shropshire By the time (the Leaning Tower of Pisa) was 10% built, everyone knew it would be a total
disaster. But the investment was so big they felt compelled to go on. Since its completion, it cost
a fortune "Some people wear their heart up on their sleeve. I wear mine underneath my right pant leg, strapped to my boot." (Ani Difranco) Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's
family does too.
-- Anonymous Shropshire
Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.
- Auric Goldfinger, in Goldfinger by Ian L. Fleming The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
-- G. K. Chesterton Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
-- Bob Perelman "There is no such thing as a person that nothing has happened to, and each person's story is as different as his fingertips." (Elsa Lanchester) Half of the American people never read a newspaper.
Half never voted for President.
One hopes it is the same half.
-- Gore Vidal Shropshire Dear Mrs, Mr, Miss, or Mr and Mrs Daneeka: Words cannot express the deep personal grief I experienced when your husband, son, father or brother was killed, wounded, or reported missing in action. -- C Consequences, schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich!
-- Chuck Jones-directed cartoon All science is concerned with the relationship of cause and effect. Each scientific discovery
increases man's ability to predict the consequences of his actions and thus his ability to control
futur Shropshire
I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in
charge, I believe everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about.
-- Hen It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
- Albert Einstein Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
-- John Galsworthy How is it that little children are so intelligent and men so stupid? It must be education that does it.
-- Alexandre Dumas fils A beauty is a woman you notice; A charmer is one who notices you.
-- Adlai Stevenson Shropshire A man has to live with himself, and he should see to it that he always has good company.
-- Charles Evans Hughes We never reflect how pleasant it is to ask for nothing.
-- Seneca There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as
though everything is a miracle.
-- Albert Einstein Shropshire
If a relationship is to evolve, it must go through a series of endings.
-- Lisa Moriyama All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
-- Edgar Allan Poe Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust.
-- Grover Cleveland It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.
-- Abraham Lincoln For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt Shropshire "The greatest pleasure in life is doing what others say you cannot do." (Anonymous) Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.
-- Edward H. Land He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
-- Anonymous Shropshire
A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Goethe I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
-- Elvis Presley "We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly." (Bill Mahe "A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men." (Roald Dahl) I owe the government $3400 in taxes. So I sent them two hammers and a toilet seat.
-- Michael McShane Shropshire Every flower must grow through dirt.
-- Anonymous Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.
- Mark Twain After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.
-- Aldous Huxley Shropshire
Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to.
-- Shane Leslie "No one lies so boldly as the man who is indignant." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for the appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George Bernard Shaw Imagination is the highest kite one can fly.
-- Lauren Bacall "I expect nothing. I fear no one. I am free." (Nikos Kazantzakis) Shropshire I was under medication when I made the decision not to burn the tapes.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President "It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so." (Mark Twain) "I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats." (Woody Allen, in regard to the KKK) Shropshire
The time is always right to do what is right.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr. Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of
the time.
-- E. B. White Intelligence has nothing to do with politics.
-- Londo Molari For the majority of People, smoking has a beneficial effect.
-- Dr. Ian G. Macdonald, Los Angeles surgeon, quoted in Newsweek , Nov.18th 1963. Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
-- John F. Kennedy Shropshire "Men are wise in proportion, not to their experience, but to their capacity for experience." (George Bernard Shaw) "I think all great innovations are built on rejections." (Louis-Ferdinand Céline) May you be too good for the world and not good enough for your wife. Shropshire
Women see better than men. Men see lazily, if they do not expect to act. Women see quite
without any wish to act.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from
history.
-- George Bernard Shaw Children should be like waffles--you should be able to throw the first one away.
-- Mary Alice Messenger The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault.
- Henry Kissinger In a great romance, each person plays a part the other really likes.
-- Elizabeth Ashley Shropshire We have to keep trying things we're not sure we can pull off. If we just do the things we know we
can do... you don't grow as much. You gotta take those chances on making those big mistakes.
-- Cybi Courage is the ladder on which all the other virtues mount.
-- Clare Boothe Luce Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get
money from it.
-- Stephen Leacock Shropshire
