ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
-- Carl Sandburg I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
-- Henny Youngman Musical people always want one to be perfectly dumb at the very moment when one is longing to
be perfectly deaf.
-- Oscar Wilde The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
- Von Clausewitz By Region "In every gathering of thirteen, expect one guest will turn out to be a Judas." (Aleister Crowley) If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams There are no days in life so memorable as those which vibrated to some stroke of the
imagination.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson By Region
It is not good enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well.
-- Rene Descartes Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 We can do not great things - only small things with great love.
-- Mother Theresa Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
-- John Lehman, Secretary of the Navy, 1981-1987 Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday
afternoon.
-- Susan Ertz By Region The first duty of a lecturer: to hand you after an hour's discourse a nugget of pure truth to wrap up
between the pages of your notebooks, and keep on the mantlepiece forever.
-- Virginia Woolf I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
-- Thomas Edison It was a day like this Marco Polo left for China. What are your plans for today?
--Loesje By Region
"Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer." (Jack Handey) "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain -- and most fools do." (Dale Carnegie) "Every Man and every Woman is a Star." (Aleister Crowley) I hate mankind, for I think myself to be one of them, and I know how bad I am.
-- Samuel Johnson "Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) By Region There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. -- James Holt McGavran Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree
to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. you only need a heart full
of grac "God is dead: but considering the state Man is in, there will perhaps be caves, for ages yet, in which his shadow will be shown." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, The Joyful Wisdom) By Region
Love is the dawn of marriage, and marriage is the sunset of love.
-- French saying Good hours, excellent pay, fun place to work, paid training, mean boss. Oh well, four out of five
isn't bad.
-- Help Wanted Ad, PA newspaper, 1994 "All grown-ups were once children, though few of them remember it." (Antoine de Saint Exupéry) "Crime like death is not confined to the old and withered alone. The youngest and fairest are too often its chosen victims." (Charles Dickens, 1812-70, Oliver Twist) I think every woman is entitled to a middle husband she can forget.
-- Adela Rogers St. John By Region The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.
-- Anonymous Just buy a box of popcorn and a Coca-Cola and sit back and watch.
-- James Carville, Clinton advisor, offering advice for Democrats on the term-limits vote in the
House The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.
-- Frank J. Dobie, A Texan in England, 1945 By Region
"The most exciting attractions are between two opposites that never meet." (Andy Warhol) Assassins!
-- Arturo Toscanini, to his orchestra University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
-- Henry Kissinger Ambition is not a vice of little people.
-- Michel de Montaigne Give me a museum and I'll fill it.
-- Pablo Picasso By Region I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-- Albert Einstein "Deep down, no one really believes they have a right to live. But this death sentence generally stays tucked away, hidden beneath the difficulty of living. If that difficulty is removed from time to t The health of the people is really the foundation upon which all their happiness and all their
powers as a State depend.
-- Benjamin Disraeli By Region
Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
-- Mark Twain I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like
toxic waste.
-- David Bissonette Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
-- Mother Teresa A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon
them.
-- Anonymous By Region A person should never be ashamed to own that he is wrong, which is but saying in other words
that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.
-- Alexander Pope Life is to be fortified by many friendships. To love and to be loved is the greatest happiness of
existence.
-- Sydney Smith Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the
consequences.
-- Isadora Duncan By Region
A kitten is chiefly remarkable for rushing about like mad at nothing whatever, and generally
stopping before it gets there.
-- Agnes Repplier Grad school is the snooze button on the clock-radio of life.
-- John Rogers, comedian (who holds a graduate degree in physics) Only the little people pay taxes.
-- Leona Helmsley, hotel owner and prison inmate, 1989 A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
-- Carl Sandburg A man's reach should exeed his grasp, or else what's a heaven for?
-- Robert Browning By Region Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: I would not live forever, because
we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live
forever, If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.
-- Alphonse Karr Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
-- Albert Einstein By Region
"What is tolerance? -- it is the consequence of humanity. We are all formed of frailty and error; let us pardon reciprocally each other's folly -- that is the first law of nature." (Francois Marie Ar A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
-- Gloria Steinem He who knows nothing, knows nothing. But he who knows he knows nothing knows something. And he who knows someone whose friend's wife's brother knows nothing, he knows something. Or something like that "How wondrous familiar is a fool!" (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) My father was a minister. I had to make up for the lack of sin.
-- Milwuakee mayor, on why he became a politician By Region A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.
-- John Ciardi The nation's honor is dearer than the nation's comfort; yes, than the nation's life itself.
-- Woodrow Wilson The Middle Eastern states aren't nations; they're quarrels with borders.
-- P. J. O'Rourke By Region
The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-- Albert Einstein "There is no quality in this world that is not what it is merely by contrast. Nothing exists in itself." (Herman Melville) The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
- Clinton aide George Stephanopolous speaking on Larry King Live The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same
time, and still retain the ability to function.
-- F. Scott Fitzgerald I dislike arguments of any kind. They are always vulgar, and often convincing.
-- Oscar Wilde By Region The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have
to shave twice a day.
-- Adlai Stevenson It was the greatest of the imperfect ventriloquist acts: when his lips moved, her body sang.
-- Tom Robbins "Common sense and education are highly compatible; in fact, neither is worth much without the other." (Donald G. Smith) By Region
Why don't you write books people can read?
-- Nora Joyce, to her husband James "Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under." (Henry Louis Mencken) "We have so little presumption that we should like to be known in the world, even to those who come after when we are no more. We have so little vanity that the esteem of five people, say six, amuses "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.
-- Wehrner von Braun By Region Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
-- Aldous Huxley Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.
-- George Bernard Shaw Cliches should be avoided like the plague.
-- Anon. By Region
True thinkers are characterised by a blending of clearness and mystery.
-- Victor Hugo Age does not make us childish, as some say; it finds us true children.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe We need a president who's fluent in at least one language.
-- Buck Henry As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy.
-- Abraham Lincoln People may or may not say what they mean ... but they always say something designed to get
what they want.
-- David Mamet By Region "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." (Groucho Marx) A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
-- Sidney Goff Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one
thing.
-- Abraham Lincoln By Region
