To heck with marrying a girl who makes biscuits like her mother--I want to marry one who makes dough like her father. Many a man has finally succeeded only because he has failed after repeated efforts. If he had
never met defeat he would never have known any great victory.
-- Orison Swett Marden To correct a natural indifference I was placed half-way between misery and the sun. Misery kept
me from believing that all was well under the sun, and the sun taught me that history wasn't
everythin If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker A narcissist is someone better-looking than you are.
-- Gore Vidal Football The story of a love is not important - what is important is that one is capable of love. It is perhaps
the only glimpse we are permitted of eternity.
-- Helen Hayes Feminists are OK, I just wouldn't want my sister to marry one It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.
-- Abraham Lincoln Football
Great innovations should not be forced on slender majorities.
-- Thomas Jefferson Marriage is a great institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
-- Marx Groucho, the film "Animal Crackers" "Death is always and under all circumstances a tragedy, for if it is not, then it means that life itself has become one." (Theodore Roosevelt) The second half of a man's life is made up of nothing but the habits he has acquired during the
first half.
Fyodor Dostoevsky (1821 - 1881) "I am not afraid of tomorrow, for i have seen yesterday and i love today!" (William Allen White) Football A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your
girdle when your hips stick.
-- Ogden Nash If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.
- J. Paul Getty Spinster: A bachelor's wife. Football
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
-- Chinese Proverb The best reason I can think of for not running for President of the United States is that you have
to shave twice a day.
-- Adlai Stevenson Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.
-- Ken Dodd My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her. It was very good of God to let Carlyle and Mrs Carlyle marry one another and so make only two people miserable instead of four, besides being very amusing. Football "We already have the statistics for the future: the growth percentages of pollution, overpopulation, desertification. The future is already in place." (Günther Grass, Winner of the Nobel Prize for Li "Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and
ethical infants.
-- General Omar Bradley Football
"...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes) Success is just a matter of attitude.
-- Darcy E. Gibbons In the blithe days of honeymoon,
With Kate's allurements smitten,
I lov'd her late, I lov'd her soon,
And call'd her dearest kitten.
But now my kitten's grown a cat,
And cross like other wives.
If ever I get married again it would have to be under an anaesthetic.
-- Marie Tonkin The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and
remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't
work and the Football Infatuation is when you think that he's as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger,
as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is
when you r The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may
well be another profound truth.
-- Niels Bohr Sex is like bridge: If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
-- Charles Pierce Football
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -- Socrates "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." (Groucho Marx) I have lost friends, some by death, others through sheer inability to cross the street.
-- Virginia Woolf Government is like a baby. An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of
responsibility at the other.
-- Ronald Reagan, Saturday Evening Post, 1965 Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of
hers.
-- Anonymous Football Govern a family as you would cook a small fish - very gently.
-- Chinese Proverb Love is the same as like except you feel sexier.
-- Judith Viorst In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.
-- Robert Frost Football
ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Honor's a good brooch to wear in a man's hat at all times.
-- Jonson, Ben Keep in mind that neither success nor failure is ever final.
-- Roger Babson "I love to doubt as well as know." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) "To live in the hearts we leave behind is not to die." (Thomas Campbell) Football When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the
problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
-- Buckminster People may or may not say what they mean ... but they always say something designed to get
what they want.
-- David Mamet There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as
though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein Football
When you've spent half your political life dealing with humdrum issues like the environment... it's
exciting to have a real crisis on your hands.
-- Margaret Thatcher, on the Falklands Conflict "Dear World, I am leaving because I am bored. I feel I have lived long enough. I am leaving you with your worries in this sweet cesspool. Good luck." (George Sanders, suicide note) Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon
them.
-- Anonymous A man's reach should exeed his grasp, or else what's a heaven for?
-- Robert Browning Eternal boyhood is the dream of a depressing percentage of American males, and the locker
room is the temple where they worship arrested development.
-- Russell Baker Football "One of the great dangers in having a career is getting bored." (Itzhak Perlman) We have art to save ourselves from the truth.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist.
-- G. K. Chesterton Football
"I never learned from a man who agreed with me." (Robert A. Heinlein) Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is most important that you do it.
-- Gandhi Nothing says lovin' like marrying your cousin!
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show "The most beautiful things in the world are the most useless, peacocks and lilies, for instance." (John Ruskin) I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha Football And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
-- Abraham Lincoln The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would not be caught dead in otherwise.
-- Roger Simon Always talk to your wife while you're making love... if there's a phone handy. Football
The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the
purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
-- Anatole France The highest use of capital is not to make more money, but to make money do more for the
betterment of life.
-- Henry Ford My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no
character.
-- Charles Barkley, on hearing Tonya Harding proclaim herself "the Charles Barkley of fig "To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
-- Samuel Paterson Football It is important that students bring a certain ragamuffin, barefoot, irreverence to their studies; they
are not here to worship what is known, but to question it.
-- J. Bronowski, The Ascent of Man We can say 'Peace on Earth,' we can sing about it, preach about it or pray about it, but if we have
not internalized the mythology to make it happen inside us, then it will not be.
-- Betty Shabazz Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago Football
Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind
and understanding. If she says she would like to go out with the Dallas Cowboys, including the
coachin Correction: Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Rev. James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago "Don't let your ego get too close to your position, so that if your position gets shot down, your ego doesn't go with it." (Colin Powell) All you need is love.
-- The Beatles, song title "I love to doubt as well as know." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) Football For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.
-- Clifton Fadiman "The love of liberty is the love of others; the love of power is the love of ourselves." (William Hazlitt) "If it doesn't matter who wins or loses, then why do they keep score?" (Vince Lombardi) Football
You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler "The things we admire in men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understanding and feeling are the concomitants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest, sharpness, greed, acquisi "Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance it accumulates in the form of inert facts." (Henry B. Adams) Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
-- Al Capp "Education is a vacine for violence." (Edward James Olmos) Football "Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few." (George Bernard Shaw) To realize that you do not understand is a virtue;
Not to realize that you do not understand is a defect.
--Lao-Tzu, "Tao Teh Ching" In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice which is still very much practiced.
-- Helen Rowland Football
