Guildford Philharmonic Choir - Large choir founded originally to sing with the Guildford Philharmonic Orchestra. Information on upcoming concerts, how to join and the history of the choir.
Guildford Photographic Society - Gives a brief history, subscriptions, meetings, internal and external competitions held, pictures by members, and contacts.
David and Katie Corrie - Children's party entertainers. Describes their services and acts with FAQ.
Guildford Philharmonic Orchestra - Details of the current concert schedule, background information on the orchestra and its education outreach activities, and some musical puzzles.
"Sometimes I think it's another sign of the sad necessity of our crowded, lonely lives, an urgent hopeless reaching out to touch something real, a deep hunger for something authentic when everything s We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. -- Groucho Marx There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to
be a coincidence.
-- Jeremy S. Anderson This world is a comedy for those who think and a tragedy for those who feel.
-- Horace Walpole Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like
what you are getting.
-- Anonymous Arts and Entertainment Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.
-- Josh Billings "In every gathering of thirteen, expect one guest will turn out to be a Judas." (Aleister Crowley) I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.
-- Mark Twain Arts and Entertainment
Never go to bed angry. Stay up and fight.
-- Phyllis Diller "Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future." (Paul Boese) Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any
antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.
-- Alfred Hitchcock I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said,
"Would you like some fries with that?"
-- Jay Leno The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.
-- Frank J. Dobie, A Texan in England, 1945 Arts and Entertainment Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.
-- Samuel Butler There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you
yourself have altered.
-- Nelson Mandela, A Long Walk to Freedom There are three great friends: an old wife, an old dog, and ready money.
-- Benjamin Franklin Arts and Entertainment
"It ends not with a bang, but a whimper." (Thomas Stearns Eliot, aka T. S. Eliot, The Hollow Man) "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) It is always right that a man should be able to render a reason for the faith that is within him.
-- Sydney Smith Familiarity breeds contempt -- and children.
-- Mark Twain The telephone company is urging people to *please* not use the telephone unless it is absolutely
necessary in order to keep the lines open for emergency personnel. We'll be right back after this
bre Arts and Entertainment "I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in grammar." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Life is not an easy matter.... You cannot live through it without falling into frustration and cynicism
unless you have before you a great idea which raises you above personal misery, above
weakness Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl could want in her life, except for good
taste in men!
-- Wedding Toast Arts and Entertainment
Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and
blows up the bonfire.
-- François de La Rouchefoucauld We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.
-- George Bernard Shaw The days just before marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book. I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President Beauty as we feel it is something indescribable; what it is or what it means can never be said.
-- George Santayana Arts and Entertainment Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.
-- Franklin D. Roosevelt The Republicans have a new healthcare proposal: Just say NO to illness!
-- Mark Russell Arts and Entertainment
In the early sixties, we were strong, we were virulent...
-- John Connally, Secretary of Treasury under Richard Nixon, in an early 70s speech, as reported
in a contemporary "American Scholar" Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting someone else to do the work.
-- John G. Pollard We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. -- H.L. Mencken I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me. -- Dick Martin "A man must dream a long time in order to act with grandeur, and dreaming is nursed in darkness." (Jean Genet) Arts and Entertainment We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind
her stands his wife.
-- Groucho Marx Conceit causes more conversation than wit.
-- LaRouchefoucauld "All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his." (Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest) Arts and Entertainment
Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
- Elbert Hubbard There is no course of life so weak and sottish as that which is managed by order, method, and
discipline.
-- Michel de Montaigne A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands. -- Guitry A thing is not necessarily true because badly uttered, nor false because spoken magnificently.
-- St. Augustine "There is no quality in this world that is not what it is merely by contrast. Nothing exists in itself." (Herman Melville) Arts and Entertainment If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
-- Harry Shearer The Middle Eastern states aren't nations; they're quarrels with borders.
-- P. J. O'Rourke I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
-- Carol Leifer Arts and Entertainment
If you don't double-click me, I can't do anything.
-- John Aniston, on how computers have taken over his life In a cat's eyes, all things belong to cats.
-- English Proverb The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
- General George Patton "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear." (Ambrose Redmoon) Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
- H. G. Wells Arts and Entertainment "I have learned that to be with those I like is enough." (Walt Whitman) I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain
and bought jewelry.
-- Rita Rudner "Things do not change, we change." (Henry David Thoreau) Arts and Entertainment
All television is children's television.
-- Richard P. Adler Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the
source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity,
ign "The only way to have friends is to be one." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) Whenever you eliminate the inedible, whatever remains, however unpalatable, must be food.
-- Anonymous The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault.
- Henry Kissinger Arts and Entertainment "If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive." (Samuel Goldwyn) "Truth lies not only in a dream, but in many dreams." (Pier Paolo Pasolini, Italian poet, novelist and filmmaker) "The happy people are failures because they are on such good terms with themselves they don't give a damn." (Agatha Christie) Arts and Entertainment
Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. "Brevity is the soul of wit." (William Shakespeare) "Sometimes I think it's another sign of the sad necessity of our crowded, lonely lives, an urgent hopeless reaching out to touch something real, a deep hunger for something authentic when everything s The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the
purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
-- Anatole France There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
-- Will Rogers Arts and Entertainment "The formula for my happiness: a Yes, a No, a straight line, a goal." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "Education must have an end in view, for it is not an end in itself." (Sybil Marshall) Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and through the nose of the
gentleman.
-- Herbert Spencer Arts and Entertainment
Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than
you is a maniac.
-- George Carlin "Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) If I have seen farther than others, it is because I was standing on the shoulders of giants.
-- Isaac Newton I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
-- Woody Allen "The depth and strength of a human character are defined by its moral reserves. People reveal themselves completely only when they are thrown out of the customary conditions of their life, for only th Arts and Entertainment There is no one so bound to his own face that he does not cherish the hope of presenting another
to the world.
-- Antonio Machado I am beginning to suspect all elaborate and special systems of education. They seem to me to be
built upon the supposition that every child is a kind of idiot who must be taught to think.
-- Anne S "Everyone is a bore to someone. That is unimportant. The thing to avoid is being a bore to oneself." (Gerald Brenan) Arts and Entertainment
Its failings notwithstanding, there is much to be said in favor of journalism in that by giving us the
opinion of the uneducated, it keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community.
-- Oscar W "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is
not a conservative, has no brains.
- Sir Winston Churchill Honolulu, it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother.
-- Ken Dodd blah "This is the hardest of all: to close the open hand out of love, and keep modest as a giver." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Arts and Entertainment The health of the people is really the foundation upon which all their happiness and all their
powers as a State depend.
-- Benjamin Disraeli I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like
toxic waste.
-- David Bissonette A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
-- Helen Rowland Arts and Entertainment
