"Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo... There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.
-- Steven Wright "I fear we are not getting rid of God because we still believe in grammar." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious.
-- Oscar Wilde By County Don't look back -- something might be gaining on you.
-- Satchel Paige All over Washington today, the politicians and the power brokers are happy. In fact, if you listen
closely, you can hear the sound of champagne corks popping.
-- Paul Jacob, Term Limits Executive Di Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe By County
There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one
of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.
-- George Bernard Shaw "Of all mankind the great poet is the equable man." (Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, 1855) Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any
antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.
-- Alfred Hitchcock The trouble with children is that they are not returnable.
-- Quentin Crisp Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by heart and his friends can
only read the title.
-- Virginia Woolf By County Behind every great fortune there is a crime.
- Honore de Balzac We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.
-- George Bernard Shaw He who has lost honor can lose nothing more.
-- Publilius Syrus By County
Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the
time by watching the second hand of a clock.
-- Ben Hecht "What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) My wife ran off with my best friend last week. I miss him! Where there is love there is life.
-- Gandhi Television: A medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.
-- Ernie Kovacs By County In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.
- W.B. Prescott There's a saying among prospectors: "Go out looking for one thing, and that's all you'll ever find."
-- Robert Flaherty America's one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.
-- Bobcat Goldthwait By County
There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
- Frank Zappa The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going
to make fun of you.
-- Woody Allen A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There
are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's
reall By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -- Socrates You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true.
-- Richard Bach By County The possibility that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause
we believe to be just.
-- Abraham Lincoln This isn't right, this isn't even wrong.
- Wolfgang Pauli (1900-1958), upon reading a young physicist's paper Opera in English is, in the main, about as sensible as baseball in Italian.
-- H. L. Mencken By County
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman
is one who can find such a man.
-- Lana Turner It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
-- Vince Lombardi Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Gustav Jung The most savage controversies are about those matters as to which there is no good evidence
either way.
-- Bertrand Russell By County Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.
-- George Washington "Today was good. / Today was fun. / Tomorrow is another one." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) Most rock journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who
can't read.
-- Frank Zappa By County
Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run.
- Rudyard Kipling A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
- John D. Rockefeller I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
-- Groucho Marx I couldn't remember when I had been so disappointed. Except perhaps the time I found out that
M&Ms really do melt in your hand...
-- Peter Oakley The person who is slowest in making a promise is most faithful in its performance.
-- Jean-Jacques Rousseau By County "Everyone is a bore to someone. That is unimportant. The thing to avoid is being a bore to oneself." (Gerald Brenan) Marriage is a rest period between romances. It is not because it is difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are
difficult.
-- Lucius Anneaus Seneca By County
People may or may not say what they mean ... but they always say something designed to get
what they want.
-- David Mamet We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.
-- G. K. Chesterton There are only two things a child will share willingly communicable diseases and his mother's
age.
-- Modern Maturity After all, all he did was string together a lot of old, well-known quotations.
-- H. L. Mencken, on Shakespeare I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
-- Albert Einstein By County "One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "I've just had eighteen straight whiskies. I think that's the record." (Dylan Thomas, final words) Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.
-- John Heywood By County
Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's
family does too.
-- Anonymous The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a
lot less.
-- Brendon Behan Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for
appointment by the corrupt few.
-- George bernard Shaw "One of the great dangers in having a career is getting bored." (Itzhak Perlman) Old soldiers never die, they just fade away.
-- General Douglas MacArthur By County Fine art and pizza delivery: what we do falls neatly in between.
-- David Letterman I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.
-- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does
not stop until you get into the office.
-- Robert Frost By County
To keep your marriage brimming
With love in the marriage cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
Whenever you're right, shut up. -- Nash If you cannot be the master of your language, you must be its slave. If you cannot examine your
thoughts, you have no choice but to think them, however silly they may be.
-- Richard Mitchell, from "The market is not an invention of capitalism. It has existed for centuries. It is an invention of civilization." (Mikhail Gorbachev, June 8, 1990) He who knows nothing, knows nothing. But he who knows he knows nothing knows something. And he who knows someone whose friend's wife's brother knows nothing, he knows something. Or something like that Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
-- Karl Wallenda By County Marriage is more than four bare legs in a bed.
-- Hoshang N. Akhtar "The easiest kind of relationship is with ten thousand people, the hardest is with one." (Joan Baez) "Dream as if you'll live forever; live as if you'll die tomorrow." (James Dean) By County
"Inside of a ring or out, ain't nothing wrong with going down. It's staying down that's wrong." (Muhammad Ali) "Good taste is the first refuge of the non-creative. It is the last-ditch stand of the artist." (Marshall McLuhan) "To be great is to be misunderstood." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as
though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.
Rabbi Julius Gordon By County He who has lost honor can lose nothing more.
-- Publilius Syrus Silence is as full of potential wisdom and wit as the unhewn marble of a great sculpture.
-- Aldous Huxley The whole art of teaching is only the art of awakening the natural curiosity of young minds for the
purpose of satisfying it afterwards.
-- Anatole France By County
Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn'd.
-- William Congreve Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find
out how to do it.
-- Theodore Roosevelt "You know that being an American is more than a matter of where your parents came from. It is a belief that all men are created free and equal and that everyone deserves an even break." (Harry S. Tru "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." (Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.) Every major horror of history was committed in the name of an altruistic motive.
-- Ayn Rand By County If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
-- Abraham Lincoln Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and annoys the pig.
-- Anon. Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
-- Groucho Marx By County
