In marriage, the bridge gets a shower. But for the groom, it's curtains! Say goodbye to the oldies, but goodies, because the good old days weren't always good and
tomorrow aint as bad as it seems.
-- Billy Joel Life is not an easy matter.... You cannot live through it without falling into frustration and cynicism
unless you have before you a great idea which raises you above personal misery, above
weakness Where there is marriage without love, there will be love without marriage.
-- Benjamin Franklin There is no one so bound to his own face that he does not cherish the hope of presenting another
to the world.
-- Antonio Machado Guides and Directories "My daughter has never forgiven me. for what, I don't know, because for years, she won't speak to me. She blackens my name in the press and makes me think abortion is an excellent idea." (Klaus Kinsk Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as
children.
-- Libby Gelman-Waxner Change is not merely necessary to life, it is life.
-- Alvin Toffler Guides and Directories
Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
-- Karl Marx, dying words to his housekeeper He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke.
-- Terry Cohen I belong to Bridegrooms Anonymous. Whenever I feel like getting married, they send over a lady in a housecoat and hair curlers to burn my toast for me. -- Dick Martin "A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized." (Fred Allen) People, like nails, lose their effectiveness when they lose direction and begin to bend.
-- Walter Savage Landor Guides and Directories It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
-- Woody Allen Mary had a little lamb and the doctor fainted.
-- Anonymous Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by heart and his friends can
only read the title.
-- Virginia Woolf Guides and Directories
A person is not given integrity. It results from the relentless pursuit of honesty at all times.
-- Anon. Jake liked his women the way he liked his kiwi fruit: sweet yet tart, firm-fleshed yet yielding to the
touch, and covered with short brown fuzzy hair.
-- Jonathan S. Haas Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious.
-- Oscar Wilde Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark
in one another.
-- Kenny Ausubel "Someday there will be girls and women whose name will no longer mean the mere opposite of the male, but something in itself, something that makes one think not of any compliment and limit, but only o Guides and Directories Obstacles cannot crush me. Every obstacle yields to stern resolve. He who is fixed to a star does
not change his mind.
-- Leonardo da Vinci, Notebooks Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
- Mel Brooks The grand aim of all science is to cover the greatest number of empirical facts by logical
deduction from the smallest number of hypotheses or axioms.
-- Albert Einstein Guides and Directories
It is amazing at how small a price may the wedding ring be placed upon a worthless hand; but, by
the beauty of our law, what heaps of gold are indispensable to take it off!
-- Douglas Jerold, 1858 "Thanks to my solid academic training, today I can write hundreds of words on virtually any topic without possessing a shred of information, which is how I got a good job in journalism." (Dave Barry) The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning
it.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton Man is a natural polygamist. He always has one woman leading him by the nose and another
hanging on to his coattails.
-- H. L. Mencken When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is
when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.
-- Marcel Achard Guides and Directories I like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.
-- Mae West You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's
arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
-- Jonathan Carroll, Outside The great tragedy of science, the slaying of a beautiful theory by an ugly fact.
-- Thomas Henry Huxley Guides and Directories
A really busy person never knows how much he weighs.
-- Ed Howe Only the little people pay taxes.
-- Leona Helmsley, hotel owner and prison inmate, 1989 They will say you are on the wrong road, if it is your own.
-- Antonio Porchi Launch out into the deep. One discovers by living in scorn of consequence.
-- Essie Summers "Those who feel certainty are stupid and those with any imagination or understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970) Guides and Directories Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft...and the only one that can be mass
produced with unskilled labor.
-- Wernher von Braun "Nothing has been purchased more dearly than the little bit of reason and sense of freedom which now constitutes our pride." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Love is the same as like except you feel sexier.
-- Judith Viorst Guides and Directories
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
-- Albert Einstein Realism is a corruption of reality.
-- Wallace Stevens Conceit causes more conversation than wit.
-- LaRouchefoucauld I didn't have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.
-- Mark Twain "If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way." (Mark Twain) Guides and Directories Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
-- Anonymous Teaching is not a lost art, but the regard for it is a losttradition.
-- Jacques Barzun "Do you know that places only yield up their secrets, their most profound mysteries, to those who are just passing through?" (Salman Rushdie, The Moor's Last Sigh) Guides and Directories
"The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." (William Blake) You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler "A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men." (Roald Dahl) The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.
-- Blaise Pascal, Pensées, trans. A.J. Krailsheimer His ignorance is encyclopedic
- Abba Eban Guides and Directories Facts are the enemy of truth.
- Don Quixote - Man of La Mancha A lover tries to stand in well with the pet dog of the house.
-- Moliere For a male and female to live continuously together is...biologically speaking, an extremely
unnatural condition.
-- Robert Briffault Guides and Directories
The west wasn't won on salad.
-- ND Beef Council, billboard advertisement, 1990 In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been
widely regarded as a bad move.
-- Douglas Adams When women go wrong, men go right after them.
-- Mae West "We're all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don't make any big ones." (Andrew A. Rooney) I'm worried that the universe will soon need replacing. It's not holding a charge.
-- Edward Chilton Guides and Directories The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.
-- Paul Ehrlich Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteeen.
-- Albert Einstein Stung by the splendour of a sudden thought.
-- Robert Browning Guides and Directories
"There is no quality in this world that is not what it is merely by contrast. Nothing exists in itself." (Herman Melville) I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.
- Cicero "O' What may man within him hide, though angel on the outward side!" (William Shakespeare) I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and
intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
- Galileo Galilei For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate,
the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
-- Rainer Maria Ril Guides and Directories Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage, they are giving evidence at an
inquest.
-- H. L. Mencken The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
-- Honore de Balzac I will try to follow the advice that a university president once gave a prospective commencement
speaker. "Think of yourself as the body at an Irish wake" he said. "They need you in order to have
th Guides and Directories
Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more open. You're able to
benefit from the unique viewpoints of others, without being crippled by your own judgment.
-- Ralph Mars If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?
-- Harry Shearer "One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Health food makes me sick.
-- Calvin Trillin Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
- Gail Godwin Guides and Directories If there is any one proof of a man's incompetence, it is the stagnant mentality of a worker who,
doing some small routine job in a vast undertaking, does not care to look beyond the lever of a
machi The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.
-- Blaise Pascal, Pens&eactue;es, trans. A.J. Krailsheimer You can not apply mathematics as long as words still becloud reality.
-- Hermann Weyl Guides and Directories
Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe What luck for the rulers that men do not think.
-- Adolf Hitler We think caged birds sing, when indeed they cry.
-- John Webster I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a
woman.
-- Virginia Woolf This is the miracle that happens every time to those who really love; the more they give, the more
they possess.
-- Rainer Maria Rilke Guides and Directories Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
- Henry David Thoreau Politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it.
-- Tom Robbins Men have become the tools of their tools.
-- Henry David Thoreau Guides and Directories
