If it were weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
-- Rodney Dangerfield What luck for the rulers that men do not think.
-- Adolf Hitler "So little done, so much to do." (Cecil Rhodes) If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.
-- Anne Bradstreet Joy is but the sign that creative emotion is fulfilling its purpose.
-- Charles Du Bos Newcastle "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) "As a child, I thought I hated everybody, but when I grew up I realized it was just children I didn't like." (Philip Larkin) If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
-- Scott Adams Newcastle
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
-- Anonymous One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if
possible, speak a few reasonable words.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe I think we are drawn to dogs because they are the uninhibited creatures we might be if we weren't
certain we knew better.
-- George Bird Evans The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted
in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism.
-- Heidi Hartmann, The Unha Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.
-- Soren Kierkegaard Newcastle Marry in haste, repent in leisure.
-- Tilney What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
-- Woody Allen Sign in a marriage counselor's window: "Out to lunch - Think it over." Newcastle
Just buy a box of popcorn and a Coca-Cola and sit back and watch.
-- James Carville, Clinton advisor, offering advice for Democrats on the term-limits vote in the
House Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. Experience teaches only the teachable.
-- Aldous Huxley Golf is a good walk spoiled.
-- Mark Twain There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to
be a coincidence.
-- Jeremy S. Anderson Newcastle Life is a succession of lessons enforced by immediate reward, or, oftener, by immediate
chastisement.
-- Ernest Dimnet Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from
history.
-- George Bernard Shaw Laywers, I suppose, were children once.
-- Charles Lamb Newcastle
Sometimes you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right.
-- Jerry Garcia We need the iron qualities that go with true manhood. We need the positive virtues of resolution,
of courage, of indomitable will, of power to do without shrinking the rough work that must always
be Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.
-- Edward H. Land A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend upon the support of Paul.
-- George Bernard Shaw Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
- Mark Twain Newcastle You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler "The want of logic annoys. Too much logic bores. Life eludes logic, and everything that logic alone constructs remains artificial and forced." (André Gide) The advice your son rejected is now being given by him to your grandson. Newcastle
Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.
- Georg Lichtenberg Never tell. Not if you love your wife... In fact, if your old lady walks in on you, deny it. Yeah. Just
flat out and she'll believe it: "I'm tellin' ya. This chick came downstairs with a sign around A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
-- Helen Rowland Experience is not what happens to you; it's what you do with what happens to you.
-- Aldous Huxley This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold
of a hammer.
-- Will Rogers Newcastle Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.
-- Margaret Mead "Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be." (Ralph Waldo Emerson) If ever I get married again it would have to be under an anaesthetic.
-- Marie Tonkin Newcastle
Truth often suffers more by the heat of its defenders than the arguments of its opposers.
-- William Penn "Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet." (Mae West) If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wright "There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it." (Christopher Darlington Morley) Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing.
-- Oscar Wilde Newcastle A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
-- Gloria Steinem I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
-- W. C. Fields If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
-- Steven Wright Newcastle
At every crossroads on the path that leads to the future, tradition has placed 10,000 men to guard
the past.
-- Maurice Maeterlink I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
-- Bill Hoest What if it was cats who invented technology... would they have tv shows starring rubber sqeak
toys?
-- Douglas Coupland As for courage and will - we cannot measure how much of each lies within us, we can only trust
there will be sufficient to carry through trials which may lie ahead.
-- Andre Norton Teach a parrot the terms "supply and demand" and you've got an economist.
-- Thomas Carlyle Newcastle Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you.
-- John-Paul Sartre A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos He who receives an idea from me receives instruction for himself without lessening mine; as he
who lights his taper at mine receives light without darkening me.
-- Thomas Jefferson Newcastle
Once a boy becomes a man, he's a man all his life, but a woman is only sexy until she becomes
your wife.
-- Al Bundy, character on "Married with Children," U.S. television show One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do
what he was afraid he couldn't do.
-- Henry Ford Wisdom is knowing what to do next; virtue is doing it.
-- David Starr Jordan We are not in a position in which we have nothing to work with. We already have capacities,
talents, direction, missions, callings.
-- Abraham Maslow A kitten is chiefly remarkable for rushing about like mad at nothing whatever, and generally
stopping before it gets there.
-- Agnes Repplier Newcastle Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is most important that you do it.
-- Gandhi In the past decade or so, the women's magazines have taken to running home-handyperson
articles suggesting that women can learn to fix things just as well as men. These articles are
apparently based Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
-- Philip K. Dick Newcastle
You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone.
-- John Ciardi ARDOR, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, 1911 Hardly a year passes that fails to find a new, oft-times exotic, research method or technique
added to the armamentarium of political inquiry. Anyone who cannot negotiate Chi squares,
assess randomi Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like
what you are getting.
-- Anonymous Black holes are where God divided by zero.
- Steven Wright Newcastle Nobody ever died of laughter.
-- Max Beerbohm "Are you bored with life? Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart, live for it, die for it, and you will find happiness that you had thought could never be yours." (Dale "Failure is not an option!" (Ed Harris, as Gene Kranz, Apollo 13) Newcastle
Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.
-- Jim Backus "I should reproach him for not giving us enough evidence." (Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 1872-1970, what he would say to God if they 'met') There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
-- Will Rogers "The act of policing is, in order to punish less often, to punish more severely." (Napoleon Bonaparte) Newcastle Two souls with but a single thought,
Two hearts that beat as one.
-- Fredrich Halm If a man is talking in the forest, and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?
-- Jenny Weber Politics have no relation to morals.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli Newcastle
The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning
it.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton "Death where is thy sting? Love, where is thy glory?" (William Shakespeare) If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not a poet
enough to call forth its riches; for to the creator there is no poverty and no poor indifferent p Life is a succession of lessons enforced by immediate reward, or, oftener, by immediate
chastisement.
-- Ernest Dimnet Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by
committee meetings.
-- George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994 Newcastle "The intellect is always fooled by the heart." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) Now is the time for all good men to come to.
-- Walt Kelly "A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools." (Douglas Adams) Newcastle
