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In marriage, the bridge gets a shower. But for the groom, it's curtains! A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
- Paul Erdos The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
-- Paula Poundstone Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
-- Bob Perelman Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you
underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell Birkenshaw "Some people must go to extremes to get the world in balance for themselves. Some can't bear bright lights, so wherever they go they search for the dark; they turn the lights down, anything to sustain "There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience and that is not learning from experience." (Archibald McLeish) Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
-- Red Buttons Birkenshaw
If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough.
- Mario Andretti When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is
when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.
-- Marcel Achard "Beauty awakens the soul to act." (Dante Alighieri, 1265-1321) "Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery." (Andy Warhol) I worship the quicksand he walks in.
- Art Buchwald Birkenshaw The person who is slowest in making a promise is most faithful in its performance.
-- Jean-Jacques Rousseau "Our destiny exercises its influence over us even when, as yet, we have not learned its nature: it is our future that lays down the law of our today." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) If men knew all that women think, they'd be twenty times more daring.
-- Alphonse Karr Birkenshaw
In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty.
-- Christopher Morley The paradox is really the pathos of intellectual life and just as only great souls are exposed to
passions it is only the great thinker who is exposed to what I call paradoxes, which are . . .
grand Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
-- Anonymous "Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time." (E. B. White) "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Birkenshaw Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
-- Oscar Wilde "A man who flies from his fear may find he has only taken a shortcut to meet it." (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien) Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. Birkenshaw
In America, anybody can be president. That's one of the risks you take.
-- Adlai Stevenson I'm not indecisive. Am I indecisive?
-- Jim Scheibel, mayor, St. Paul MN My other wife is beautiful. "He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches." (George Bernard Shaw) "Hold the fort! I am coming!" (General William Tecumseh Sherman) Birkenshaw "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." (Oscar Wilde) Birkenshaw
Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until December 24 to do his Christmas shopping. Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.
-- Woody Allen Morality consists in suspecting other people of not being legally married.
-- George Bernard Shaw "Now that we have everything we need, we discover that there is almost nothing that we have that we want." (John Cage, M, Writings 1967 - 1972) The only thing you will ever be able to say in the so-called 'social' sciences is: "some do, some
don't."
-- Ernest Rutherford Birkenshaw Honor lies in honest toil.
-- Grover Cleveland Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting someone else to do the work.
-- John G. Pollard A thing is not necessarily true because badly uttered, nor false because spoken magnificently.
-- St. Augustine Birkenshaw
Love is like the measles. The older you get it, the worse the attack.
-- Mary Roberts Rhinehart Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
- Henry Ford The innkeeper loves the drunkard, but not for a son-in-law.
-- Yiddish Proverb "If you meet a woman that smokes cigars ... marry her." (Arthur Lotti) I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it
does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it
ha Birkenshaw "We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly." (Bill Mahe Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best
to become the best you are capable of becoming.
-- John R. Wooden, Practical Modern Basketball "Liberty has never come from the government. Liberty has always come from the subjects of it. The history of liberty is a history of resistance. The history of liberty is a history of limitations of g Birkenshaw
As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy.
-- Abraham Lincoln Children are a poor man's riches.
-- English proverb If you are all wrapped up in yourself, you are overdressed
-- Kate Halverson I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up.
-- Barbara Bush, first lady, 1989 Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control. Birkenshaw Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
- Irving Kristol I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all
the time. That would be hypocrisy.
-- Oscar Wilde "The dancer's body is simply the luminous manifestation of the soul." (Isadora Duncan) Birkenshaw
"The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing." (John Powell) "Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas." (Anonymous) "If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way." (Mark Twain) Being in therapy is great. I spend an hour just talking about myself. It's kinda like being the guy on
a date.
-- Caroline Rhea It may be that the race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong -- but that is the way
to bet.
-- Damon Runyan Birkenshaw "If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat." (Mark Twain) Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Go away...I'm alright.
-- H. G. Wells, dying words Birkenshaw
The great man fights the elements in his time that hinder his own greatness, in other words his own freedom and sincerity." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) "When thou art at Rome, do as they do at Rome." (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra, 1547-1616) You can't learn too soon that the most useful thing about a principle is that it can always be
sacrificed to expediency.
-- W. Somerset Maugham Never be possessive. If a female friend lets on that she is going out with another man, be kind
and understanding. If she says she would like to go out with the Dallas Cowboys, including the
coachin In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is
simply one of those things which happen from time to time.
-- Edward P. Tryon Birkenshaw "Excellence is in the details. Give attention to the details and excellence will come." (Perry Paxton) I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congress, especially members of the House and
members of the Senate.
-- Dan Quayle, Former Vice-President When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the
problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
-- Buckminster Birkenshaw
A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
-- Navaho saying It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.
-- Harry Truman "If you believe everything you read, you better not read." (Japanese Proverb) Nature gave men two ends - one to sit on and one to think with. Ever since then man's success or
failure has been dependent on the one he used most.
-- George R. Kirkpatrick If someone offers you a breath mint, accept it.
-- H. Jackson Brown, Jr., Life's Little Treasure Book, on wisdom Birkenshaw The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines
staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you
ask th "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action." (Herbert Spencer) "If liberty and equality, as is thought by some, are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in government to the utmost." (Aristotle) Birkenshaw
Men have become the tools of their tools.
-- Henry David Thoreau Generations to come will find it difficult to believe that a man such as Gandhi ever walked the
face of this earth.
-- Albert Einstein He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that.
-- John Stuart Mill Beware you be not swallowed up in books! An ounce of love is worth a pound of knowledge.
-- John Wesley Never practice two vices at once.
-- Tallulah Bankhead Birkenshaw To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.
-- Lao Tzu When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
-- Sacha Guitry He who knows nothing, knows nothing. But he who knows he knows nothing knows something. And he who knows someone whose friend's wife's brother knows nothing, he knows something. Or something like that Birkenshaw
