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Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
- Voltaire (1694-1778) on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan. Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.
-- George Washington "I never learned from a man who agreed with me." (Robert A. Heinlein) Use your own best judgment at all times.
-- The entire Nordstrom's Department Stores policy manual Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteeen.
-- Albert Einstein Bradford Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of
genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius.
-- Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
-- Mae West I regret that I have but one life to give for my country.
-- Nathan Hale Bradford
We haven't the money, so we've got to think.
-- Lord Rutherford The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
-- General George Patton A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their
graves obscure men whom timidity prevented from making a first effort.
-- Sydney Smith The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
-- B. F. Skinner Universities incline wits to sophistry and affectation.
-- Francis Bacon Bradford I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries." The girl at the counter said,
"Would you like some fries with that?"
-- Jay Leno It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them.
-- Pierre Augustin de Beaumarchais [You reporters] should have printed what he meant, not what he said.
-- Earl Bush, press aide to Richard Daley Bradford
The difference between false memories and true ones is the same as for jewels: it is always the
false ones that look the most real, the most brilliant.
-- Salvador Dali Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-
proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe
is "The act of policing is, in order to punish less often, to punish more severely." (Napoleon Bonaparte) And I shall love thee still my dear, Until my wife is wise. Dew knot trussed yore spell chequer two fined awl yore mistakes.
-- Brendan Hills Bradford "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." (Oscar Wilde) "It seems to me that there are two kinds of trickery: the 'fronts' people assume before one another's eyes, and the 'front' a writer puts on the face of reality." (Francois Sagan) Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them
good.
-- H.L. Mencken Bradford
"If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope. If you assume that there is an instinct for freedom, there are opportunities to change things, there's a chance for you t That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the
lessons that history has to teach.
-- Aldous Huxley "Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn; my God, do you learn!" (Clive Staples Lewis) Sleep is an excellent way of listening to an opera.
- James Stephens "Nothing is permanent but change." (Heraclitus) Bradford I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
-- Groucho Marx Do not let yourselves be discouraged or embittered by the smallness of the success you are likely
to achieve in trying to make life better. You certainly would not be able, in a single generation, to There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. -- James Holt McGavran Bradford
"Every act of violence increases the recruitment of terrorists. Iraq has been turned into a base of terror." (Noam Chomsky, from The Toronto Star, March 23, 2004) "If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive." (Samuel Goldwyn) "Wise men learn more from fools, than fools from the wise." (Anonymous) A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
-- Anonymous Whenever I date a guy, I think, is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
-- Rita Rudner Bradford Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
-- T. S. Eliot Let him who would enjoy a good future waste none of his present.
-- Roger Babson "Workers of the world unite; you have nothing to lose but your chains." (Karl Marx) Bradford
"To educate educators! But the first ones must educate themselves! And for these I write." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to
do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.
-- Anonymous Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
-- Red Buttons I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked
me in the cellar.
-- Anonymous I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
-- Katherine Cebrian Bradford He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose
-- Jim Elliott "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991) A man's wife has more power over him than the state has.
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson Bradford
I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
-- Fran Lebowitz I believe that mink are raised for being turned into fur coats and if we didn't wear fur coats those
little animals would never have been born. So is it better not to have been born or to have lived Thomas Jefferson--still surv...
-- John Adams, dying words Laundry increases exponentially in the number of children.
-- Miriam Robbins If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble.
-- Elbert Hubbard Bradford If I have not seen as far as others, it is because giants were standing on my shoulders.
-- Hal Abelson Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
-- Seen on a bumper sticker History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
-- Winston Churchill Bradford
Honor's a thing too subtle for wisdom; if honor lie in eating, he's right honorable.
-- Beaumont, Francis My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it. The best teacher is the one who suggests rather than dogmatizes, and inspires his listener with
the wish to teach himself.
-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton "When even one American--who has done nothing wrong--is forced by fear to shut his mind and close his mouth--then all Americans are in peril." (Harry S. Truman) "If liberty and equality, as is thought by some, are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in government to the utmost." (Aristotle) Bradford Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the
unpalatable.
-- John Kenneth Galbraith Every man knows his follies and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
-- Josh Billings If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not a poet
enough to call forth its riches; for to the creator there is no poverty and no poor indifferent p Bradford
Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
-- Gail Godwin I don't know exactly what democracy is. But we need more of it.
-- Anonymous Chinese Student, during protests in Tianamen Square, Beijing, 1989 Not to anticipate is already to moan.
-- Leonardo da Vinci Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of
the time.
-- E. B. White When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being
brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell, leap.
-- Cynthia H Bradford "Inside of a ring or out, ain't nothing wrong with going down. It's staying down that's wrong." (Muhammad Ali) "Frank and explicit; that is the right line to take when you wish to conceal your own mind and to confuse the minds of others." (Benjamin Disraeli, Sybil) "Any existence deprived of freedom is a kind of death." (General Michel Aoun) Bradford
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called
marriage.
-- James Holt McGavran "I love Los Angeles. I love Hollywood. They're beautiful. Everybody's plastic, but I love plastic. I want to be plastic." (Andy Warhol, Holy Terror: Andy Warhol Close Up) The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein The last good thing written in C++ was the Pachelbel Canon.
-- Jerry Olson Bradford "Everybody knows that if you are too careful, you become so occupied in being careful that you are sure to stumble over something." (Gertrude Stein) Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for the greatest fool may ask more than
the wisest man can answer.
-- Charles Caleb Colton "Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat." (Martin H. Fischer) Bradford
Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more
experiments you make the better. What if they are a little course, and you may get your coat
soiled or torn? Live out of your imagination, not your history.
-- Stephen Covey "People drag their progeny around with them like a ball and chain, like some terrible deadweight that hinders their every move - and that, as often as not, effectively winds up killing them." (Michel "The overman ... Who has organized the chaos of his passions, given style to his character, and become creative. Aware of life's terrors, he affirms life without resentment." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietz Education is the state-controlled manufacture of echoes.
-- Norman Douglas Bradford Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
-- Anonymous Grad school is the snooze button on the clock-radio of life.
-- John Rogers, comedian (who holds a graduate degree in physics) If it were weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
-- Rodney Dangerfield Bradford
