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No one really listens to anyone else, and if you try it for a while you'll see why.
-- Mignon McLaughlin "Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational." (Charles Schultz) "You believe that flag burning shows disrespect towards those who have fought to preserve our freedoms. Punishing protestors shows an even more profound disrespect for the ideals that these people die "Kill a man, and you are a murderer. Kill millions of men, and you are a conquerer. Kill everyone, and you are a god." (Jean Rostand) Never moon a werewolf.
-- Mike Binder Brighouse The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
-- B. F. Skinner Actually, the only memory I have of being a Cub Scout was trying to get my hat back. That was all
I did. Run back and forth at my bus stop going "Quit it."
-- Jerry Seinfeld Joy is but the sign that creative emotion is fulfilling its purpose.
-- Charles Du Bos Brighouse
"It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else." (John W Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives.
-- John Stuart Mill "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.
-- Lewis Grizzard Whatever you are, be a good one.
-- Abraham Lincoln Brighouse Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100-foot clipper.
-- Unknown history student Silence is as full of potential wisdom and wit as the unhewn marble of a great sculpture.
-- Aldous Huxley He who has a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'.
- Friedrich Nietzsche Brighouse
If excessive smoking actually plays a role in the production of lung cancer, it seems to be a minor
one.
-- Dr. W.C. Heuper of the National Cancer Institute, as quoted in the New York Times on Apri For best results: wash in cold water separately, hang dry and iron with warm iron. For not so good
results: drag behind car through puddles, blow-dry on roofrack.
-- Laundry instructions on a shirt One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if
possible, speak a few reasonable words.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
-- Albert Einstein Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
-- Oscar Wilde Brighouse If the headache would only precede the intoxication, alcoholism would be a virtue.
-- Samuel Butler There is nothing so wrong in this world that a sensible woman can't set it right in the course of an
afternoon.
-- Giraudoux "Crime like death is not confined to the old and withered alone. The youngest and fairest are too often its chosen victims." (Charles Dickens, 1812-70, Oliver Twist) Brighouse
Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else.
-- George Bernard Shaw The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.
-- Paul Ehrlich This is a test. It is only a test. Had it been an actual job, you would have received raises,
promotions, and other signs of appreciation.
-- Anonymous A man can do what he wants, but not want what he wants.
-- Arthur Schoperhauer The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism
is the equal sharing of miseries.
-- Winston Churchill Brighouse The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be
feasible.
- A Yale University management professor in response to student Fred Smith's paper prop "If liberty and equality, as is thought by some, are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in government to the utmost." (Aristotle) Nothing average ever stood as a monument to progress. When progress is looking for a partner it
doesn't turn to those who believe they are only average. It turns instead to those who are forever
sea Brighouse
A university professor set an examination question in which he asked what is the difference
between ignorance and apathy. The professor had to give an A+ to a student who answered: I
don't know and Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
-- Thomas Jones "The first question I ask myself when something doesn't seem to be beautiful is why do I think it's not beautiful. And very shortly you discover that there is no reason." (John Cage) "We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police." (Jeff Marder) If all these sweet young things were laid end to end, I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised.
-- Dorothy Parker Brighouse The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.
- definition of happiness by John F. Kennedy An understanding heart is everything is a teacher, and cannot be esteemed highly enough. One
looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our
human No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in.
-- Anon. Brighouse
"Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery." (Andy Warhol) Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
-- Anonymous "You make 'em, I amuse 'em." (Theodor Seuss Geisel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss, 1904-1991, on children) Happiness is nothing more than health and a poor memory.
-- Albert Schweitzer The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart.
-- Robert G. Ingersoll Brighouse I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all
over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University History repeats itself; that's one of the things that's wrong with history.
-- Clarence Darrow I have been attacked by Rush Limbaugh on the air, an experience somewhat akin to being
gummed by a newt. It doesn't actually hurt, but it leaves you with slimy stuff on your ankle.
-- Molly Ivins Brighouse
Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
- Voltaire (1694-1778) on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan. "To educate educators! But the first ones must educate themselves! And for these I write." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no
religious basis is necessary. Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear
of "We the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution." (Abraham Lincoln, 1809-65) It was just him and me. He fought with honor. If it weren't for his honor, he and the others would
have beaten me together. They might have killed me, then. His sense of honor saved my life. I
didn' Brighouse Love, I find, is like singing. Everybody can do enough to satisfy themselves, though it may not
impress the neighbors as being very much.
-- Zora Neale Hurston A scar nobly got, or a noble scar, is a good livery of honour; so belike is that.
-- Shakespeare, William Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through
self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
-- Helen Keller Brighouse
"We're an embarrasment to college graduates across America." (James Douglas Morrison, lead singer of The Doors) Change before you have to.
-- Jack Welch The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.
-- Kin Hubbard Wit is educated insolence.
- Aristotle A dollar saved is a quarter earned.
-- John Ciardi Brighouse Colleges are places where pebbles are polished and diamonds are dimmed.
-- Robert G. Ingersoll, (seen attributed to "R.S. Ingersoll" - a typo?) Long engagements give people the opportunity of finding out each other's character before
marriage, which is never advisable.
-- Oscar Wilde Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
-- Thomas Jones Brighouse
Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy-- the
mother.
-- Claudette Colbert "I'm basically an optimist in life but this doesn't prevent me from deducing as a scientist that we are probably doomed." (Vladimir Chaloupka, physicist, University of Washington, regarding mankind's Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
-- Chinese Proverb Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
- Mark Twain A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.
Robert Frost (1874-1963) Brighouse I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
-- Lewis Grizzard There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never
were, and ask why not?
-- Robert Francis Kennedy A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes.
-- Joseph Addison Brighouse
There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a
natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend A great deal of talent is lost to the world for want of a little courage. Every day sends to their
graves obscure men whom timidity prevented from making a first effort.
-- Sydney Smith The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this
is true.
-- James Branch Cabell, The Silver Stallion We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.
-- G. K. Chesterton >From error to error one discovers the entire truth.
-- Sigmund Freud Brighouse We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.
-- G. K. Chesterton It is important that students bring a certain ragamuffin, barefoot, irreverence to their studies; they
are not here to worship what is known, but to question it.
-- J. Bronowski, The Ascent of Man Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
- Ambrose Bierce Brighouse
Bachelor: the only man who has never told his wife a lie. I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
-- W. C. Fields Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can
never tell.
-- Joan Crawford You will marry into an Indian tribe and become one big Hopi family. Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes Brighouse It is always right that a man should be able to render a reason for the faith that is within him.
-- Sydney Smith Infatuation is when you think that he's as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger,
as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is
when you r Oregon Democratic Senate candidate Tom Bruggere, in describing his support for
comprehensive health care during a candidates' forum, said he supported "erection-to-
resurrection" coverage. He later a Brighouse
