Otley and District Chamber of Trade and Commerce - Supporting the business community in the thriving market town and the area around. Information on meetings, seminars, news and contact details.
Almscliff Solutions - Providing ICT and information security services to small and medium sized companies. Includes profile, case studies and detailed virus listings.
Future Media - Specialise in design and development of websites, online marketing and e-commerce. Includes portfolio of case-studies.
The Woolsafe Organisation - Offer accreditation for businesses in the cleaning industry, and advice for consumers. Information about the scheme in the UK, Europe, and worldwide.
"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." (Groucho Marx) "It wasn't until I started reading and found books they wouldn't let us read in school that I discovered you could be insane and happy and have a good life without being like everybody else." (John W Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and
hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in
Heaven.
-- P. J The only thing you will ever be able to say in the so-called 'social' sciences is: "some do, some
don't."
-- Ernest Rutherford Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea -- massive, difficult to redirect, awe-
inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least
expect i Business and Economy Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find
out how to do it.
-- Theodore Roosevelt Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.
-- Samuel Goldwyn, immigrant-turned-famous-movie-producer, when told his son was getting
married "Dying is the most embarrassing thing that can ever happen to you, because someone's got to take care of all your details." (Andy Warhol, America, 1985) Business and Economy
Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress.
-- Anonymous Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
-- Colin Greene A human being is a part of the whole, called by us Universe, a part limited in time and space. He
experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest--a kind of
optic Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.
-- Groucho Marx It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
-- Vince Lombardi Business and Economy You've no idea of what a poor opinion I have of myself, and how little I deserve it.
-- W.S. Gilbert I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
-- Lewis Grizzard I hate mankind, for I think myself to be one of them, and I know how bad I am.
-- Samuel Johnson Business and Economy
This delivery driver carries no money. His wife has it all. They had a dispute about a night out with the boys. But he finally decided to let her go.
-- Anonymous Whatever women do they must do it twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily this
is not difficult.
-- Charlotte Whitton No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent.
-- Abraham Lincoln "He who cannot give anything away cannot feel anything either." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche) Business and Economy Launch out into the deep. One discovers by living in scorn of consequence.
-- Essie Summers "Marriage excuses no one the freak's roll-call." (Joe Orton, What the Butler Saw) May you be too good for the world and not good enough for your wife. Business and Economy
"It seems to me that almost all our sadnesses are moments of tension, which we feel as paralysis because we no longer hear our astonished emotions living." (Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poe Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche "And on the seventh day, God stepped back and said 'There is my creation, perfect in every way ... oh, damn it, I left pot all over the place. Now they'll think I want them to smoke it. Now I have to Do not assume that she who seeks to comfort you now, lives untroubled among the simple and
quiet words that sometimes do you good. Her life may also have much sadness and difficulty, that
remains fa In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.
-- Robert Frost Business and Economy Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of
the time.
-- E. B. White When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.
-- Clarence Darrow "The devil's agents may be of flesh and blood, may they not?" (Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, The Hound of the Baskervilles) Business and Economy
Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance.
-- King George V In every country and every age, the priest has been hostile to Liberty.
-- Thomas Jefferson "Being born is like being kidnapped. And then sold into slavery." (Andy Warhol) I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
-- Thomas Edison Call on God, but row away from the rocks.
-- Indian proverb Business and Economy The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
-- Honore de Balzac Hardly a year passes that fails to find a new, oft-times exotic, research method or technique
added to the armamentarium of political inquiry. Anyone who cannot negotiate Chi squares,
assess randomi Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
-- Mark Twain Business and Economy
Silence is as full of potential wisdom and wit as the unhewn marble of a great sculpture.
-- Aldous Huxley Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is most important that you do it.
-- Gandhi Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous
and dreadful.
-- Samuel Johnson "Do you know that places only yield up their secrets, their most profound mysteries, to those who are just passing through?" (Salman Rushdie, The Moor's Last Sigh) He who laughs last didn't get it.
-- Helen Giangregorio Business and Economy Live out of your imagination, not your history.
-- Stephen Covey "The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well meaning, but without understanding." (Louis Brandeis) Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we learn. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of
fear and prejudices and the acceptance of love back in our hearts. Love is the essential reality
and Business and Economy
The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
-- ee cummings You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little pot belly and a bald
spot.
-- Elayne Boosler I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
-- Thomas Edison I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.
- Thomas Jefferson When people go to work, they shouldn't have to leave their hearts at home.
-- Betty Bender Business and Economy I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
-- Fran Lebowitz >From the Far East I send you one single thought, one sole idea--written in red on every
beachhead form Australia to Tokyo--There is no substitute for victory!
-- General Douglas MacArthur Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
-- Don Stanford Business and Economy
Having children makes you no more a parent than having a piano makes you a pianist.
-- Michael Levine, Lessons at the Halfway Point Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in
accordance with the dictates of reason.
-- Oscar Wilde Public office is the last refuge of a scoundrel.
-- Boies Penrose, 1931 I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
-- Elvis Presley "The English have all the material requisites for the revolution. What they lack is the spirit of generalization and revolutionary ardour." (Karl Marx) Business and Economy What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?
-- Robert Schuller He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
-- Anonymous "We always get bored with those whom we bore." (François VI Duke (duc) de La Rochefoucauld, 1616-80) Business and Economy
Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony.
-- Oliver Herford "There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method." (Herman Melville, Moby Dick) We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
- Niels Bohr He who dies a thousand deaths meets the final hour with the calmness of one who approaches a
well remembered door.
-- Heywood Brown I would have made a good Pope.
-- Richard Nixon, U.S. President Business and Economy A sweetheart is a bottle of wine, a wife is a wine bottle.
-- Baudelaire "Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it." (George Bernard Shaw) My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music.
-- Vladimir Nabokov Business and Economy
Whatever you are from nature, keep to it; never desert your own line of talent. Be what nature
intended you for, and you will succeed; be anything else, and you will be ten thousands times
worse tha Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
-- Mae West Don't be so humble - you are not that great.
- Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat "Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom." (Raymonde Uy) "If liberty and equality, as is thought by some, are chiefly to be found in democracy, they will be best attained when all persons alike share in government to the utmost." (Aristotle) Business and Economy "I am convinced that it is not the fear of death, of our lives ending that haunts our sleep so much as the fear ... that as far as the world is concerned, we might as well never have lived." (Rabbi H Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same
thing nowadays.
-- Oscar Wilde I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way
around Chinatown.
-- Woody Allen Business and Economy
"Fear is a darkroom where negatives develop." (Usman Asif) The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.
-- Frank J. Dobie, A Texan in England, 1945 Public office is the last refuge of a scoundrel.
-- Boies Penrose, 1931 Life is not an easy matter.... You cannot live through it without falling into frustration and cynicism
unless you have before you a great idea which raises you above personal misery, above
weakness The course of true love never did run smooth.
-- William Shakespeare Business and Economy Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read.
-- Groucho Marx I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again.
-- Bart Simpson, young character from The Simpsons, U.S. animated television show We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.
-- Aesop Business and Economy
